Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Bonus Blind: A-List Beard Was High School Boozer!

From Monday Oct 4 -


Bonus Blind: A-List Beard Was High School Boozer!


Poor Priscilla Desert. That goody-two-shoes mass-marketed image of hers just may crumble sooner than folks think.
Speak NowNot only has the über-talented Pris already happily agreed to let herself be used as a People cover-ready beard for one of her gay-boy boyfriends, now it turns out Miss P. has a past:
Turns out P.D. really liked to get her booze on back in those days, and many of Priscilla's so-called "friends" from the lunchroom are starting to talk about it, big time.
One of those massively paid campers that follow Pris around like flies to Beverly Hills crap should do something about this nastiness, already. In fact, I think they already have. We've noticed that the more tips we get about Pris's fondness for boys and the booze, along comes another fakey magazine story about what a right-on and humble religious girl Priscilla happens to be.
Jeez. When's the public going to stop being as gullible as the legal types who keep accepting Lindsay Lohan's excuses? Wake up, people!
And, uh, Priscilla, get a clue (not to mention a spine): You know there are people in the world who happen to believe in God and think it's OK to date boys and have drinks, too.
And it Ain't: Miranda Cosgrove, Jasmine Villegas, Demi Lovato




Here is the link to the previous Priscilla Desert Blind Vice from January 2010.


Top suspect: still Taylor Swift.


As of 3/30/11 - Ted has eliminated Blake Lively, Nikki Reed, Emily Osment, Miranda Cosgrove, Jasmine Villegas, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, Hayden Panettiere, Julianne Hough, Lindsay Lohan, Renée Zellweger, Mila Kunis

* Proven to be Priscilla Desert by timeline of dates that she was not a BV and then confirmed as one: TAYLOR SWIFT


29 comments:

roseyf said...

Not that I think high school drinking is deserving of a Vice, but this is just confirming that it's Taylor. There were stories a while ago about her Myspace page and comments between her HS friends and TS about drinking.

Here's one:
http://socialbutterflies.wordpress.com/2009/06/07/taylor-swift-drunk-as-hell/

You can still go look at her page and go back to the first few pages of comments, and tell that there's some implied drinking going on. (2005-ish, which makes her 15/16)

I consider this one pretty much solved now.

Brittany said...

Did she have a nose job? I followed the link above and in the photos something is a little different now.

Jessica said...

Swifty for sure! I kind of love that she has a little edge, though drinking is pretty mild for Hollywood.

mo-mo said...

Yeah, this BV is pretty tame, but I agree that it might've just been another way to confirm Parrish Maguire as Taylor Lautner. This one is def Taylor Swift.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Do Strawberry Snort 'Em and Priscilla Desert know each other? Is there any tension between Ms. Desert and Me-Me Dallas?
—Caroline

Dear Feeling Pris-sy:
No and no...Why do you ask?"

Tara said...

Was there ever any tension between Taylor and Miley? I don't think so, considering they dated different JoBros, if I am not mistaken. Someone must think MeMe is Demi Lovato.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You say that Priscilla Desert is experienced with boys more so than Parrish Maguire, but has she gone all the way with the boys she has dated, because she seems to be quite virginal?
—Evie

Dear P-Squared:
Virginal shmirginal, have you read anything I've had to say about Pris? It's all an act, doll. And she's nailing it."

sistah2 said...

Does TS pretend to be super religious? I dont think so. This might be her, but i dont think shes actively marketed herself as a religious freak, I just think she is supposed to be pretty normal

roseyf said...

I don't think she is super religious, but she's said repeatedly in several interviews that she has never drank or smoked, and kind of markets herself as the anti-Miley.

Here's a link to a video of her saying she never "rebels" and has never had a drink.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HxCN307Vn8

It's a little hypocritical and I can see how it'd be "BV material" to her tween/teen fans.

Caz1310 said...

Taylor is a perfect example of a singer marketed to a select target group. Of course she's done the usual stuff teenagers do. She couldn't keep her 17-year old prom queen image for too many years...wonder what her record company is going to do image-wise from here? Saw a blind article where a "virginal" (image) singer has done a really racy photo shoot and the record company is freaking out how to handle/market it...this could her her?

blurry vice said...

http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/the_awful_truth/b207475_are_taylor_swift_jake_gyllenhaal_really.html

- priscilla bearding again, this time for toothy

Caz1310 said...

Does anyone have any insight into why Taylor is bearding again... for toothy of all people? Am I missing something why she doean't have any real relationships (Mayer the Player doesn't count as one). I don't find her interesting as a BV other than being mystified by someone with the whole world at her feet, could pick any partner she wanted would be bearding.

The Spie said...

Caz: It's the perfect storm. Both sides get what they want out of the bearding, which is lots and lots of delicious publicity and an image of heterosexuality for the bearded. What does Swift get out of it? She gets what she wants in a perfectly safe environment, along with a good bit of Hollywood networking (she's only 20, remember, and still has a major multimedia career in front of her, so it can't hurt to build friendships and professional relationships).

As for why she's bearding in the first place, maybe she's career-drive and not looking for romance, but her audience expects her to at least be looking for love. Bearding is the safest option.

I think this can be summed up in one word: Robsten.

a.butterfly said...

Taylor and Perry are friends, aren't they? So he says that Strawberry and Priscilla aren't friends which would mean that (most likely) Strawberry isn't Perry.

Dammit, I hate Katy Perry and was really hoping that she was a coked out skank.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
When will my two doggies hear more about their favorite Blind Vices, Priscilla Desert and Me-Me Dallas? Will another teen in their circle join the Blind Vice club soon?
—Hannah

Dear Doggy Lady:
You already do! Both are in the blogs practically every day. Ya'll just aren't keepin' your doggy ears and eyes out for the clues."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
With Taylor Swift being all over the news lately with her new album release, it has me wondering: Has she ever cracked under pressure? Does she have her own Blind Vice hidden away somewhere?
—Emma

Dear Blinded by the Blond:
Taylor will never crack—that's one tough little mother. And yes, of course, she has a Blind all to her own, already, that's a given!"

- We can now do a timeline verficiation of PD as Taylor Swift I believe! Spie? :)

blurry vice said...

Timeline: Taylor swift -

Dec 09 was not a BV.
March 24 and 29 2010 not starring role in a BV but played a supporting role in one.
Now, Nov 10 2010 has starred in her own BV.

Priscilla Desert!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Why is Taylor Swift always dating guys that gossip sites love? She's dated/been seen with Joe Jonas, Corey Monteith, Taylor Lautner, John Mayer and now Jake Gyllenhaal. Is she such a fame seeker, or do they pursue her? Is this all only about publicity?
—Laura

Dear Country Darling:
Please, T.Swift doesn't need to seek fame. Her record-breaking voice does that all on its own. The guys, however, each serve different purposes. Like being spotted on bowling dates with Corey, a wholesome Glee guy, right after she was caught making out with John Mayer in Nashville wasn't a coincidence."

The Spie said...

Blurry: Got called out of town suddenly. Will do confirmation tomorrow on this one. Should be easy.

The Spie said...

Sorry about the delay. Got called out of town to confirm a new job and had to do a thousand-mile round trip, and now I'm in the middle of recovering from said trip and packing (Space Bags: Worth The Money). So let's do this while I'm at a good break point:

Taylor Swift was said by Ted not to be a Blind Vice on December 9th, 2009. Ted stated that she was a Blind Vice on November 10th, 2010. At this point, I will ignore Ted's statements in March about Swift being a supporting player in another BV; they will only come into play if we have multiple candidates remaining after the basic elimination.

Here are the BVs in chronological order, ignoring all BV identities that pre-date December 9th, 2009, and all obvious male BVs...you know, this is the first time I've done this with a female BV, so I'm sure that there will be a number of Devil's Advocate positions to consider...

Priscilla Desert: Bearded for Parrish Maguire, who has been confirmed to be Taylor Lautner. Two solo BVs since. We know all about Tay-Squared. In Blurry's words, Ding Ding Ding.

Secretia Ohio: Married to Chester Shorts-Off. Not TSwift.

Roxy Couture: Married to Stud-Bucket LeBoeuf. Not TSwift.

Henrietta Hardball: Married to Elijah Schwad. Not TSwift.

Cruella St. Shackles: Married to Marky Sweet-Puss. Not TSwift.

(Please note March 5th and the Nevis Divine/Barrington Bang-Me BV. This is the only possibility within the period for a "supporting role", namely as Nevis' unnamed girlfriend. However, Nevis is confirmed as Robert Pattinson, and there's no connection between RPattz and TSwift.)

Hilly Ho-Tox: We know she's Heidi Montag. Ted made absolutely certain everyone knew she was Heidi Montag. Not TSwift.

Pat Poisonpuss: Revealed as Lea Michele. Not TSwift.

Strawberry Snort'Em: Has a reputation for clubbing and partying. Buddies with Morgan Mayhem; they share a gay BFF. TSwift has no common gay friends with Lindsay Lohan, as far as is known. She also seems like the type who'd be averse to risking going clubbing while still underage. Not totally eliminated, but it really doesn't fit. Chances are less than 5%.

Venetia Vag-O-Matic: In a recent big hit movie and a long-standing lesbian relationship. Neither really fit TSwift. I'll call this one as Not TSwift.

Polly Luscious-Locks: Has been in multiple hit movies, which would seem to eliminate TSwift. But the AIAs...Miley and Selena? It does make you think. I'll not say Eliminated, but will put it at less than 10%.

Misha Mayhem: Morgan's sister, and we all know who Morgan is. Not TSwift.

Valyrie Tress-Trap: Plays a vampire. Not TSwift.

Jerry Menage-e-No: Another longstanding lesbian relationship and movie star. See Venetia Vag-O-Matic.

Strippa Rip-Ya: Married to Caesar Anchovy-Arse. Not TSwift.

Buella Band and possibly Kelly Guten-Shoes: In the same TV cast as Drew Smolder-n-Such, who has been proven to be Ian Somerhalder. In other words, Vampire Diaries cast members. Not TSwift.

The Spie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Spie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Spie said...

Okay, the first part of it vanished for some reason. I think it's a little too large, so I'll split that first part into two posts. Sorry for ruining the suspense.

Taylor Swift was said by Ted not to be a Blind Vice on December 9th, 2009. Ted stated that she was a Blind Vice on November 10th, 2010. At this point, I will ignore Ted's statements in March about Swift being a supporting player in another BV; they will only come into play if we have multiple candidates remaining after the basic elimination.

Here are the BVs in chronological order, ignoring all BV identities that pre-date December 9th, 2009, and all obvious male BVs...you know, this is the first time I've done this with a female BV, so I'm sure that there will be a number of Devil's Advocate positions to consider...

Priscilla Desert: Bearded for Parrish Maguire, who has been confirmed to be Taylor Lautner. Two solo BVs since. We know all about Tay-Squared. In Blurry's words, Ding Ding Ding.

Secretia Ohio: Married to Chester Shorts-Off. Not TSwift.

Roxy Couture: Married to Stud-Bucket LeBoeuf. Not TSwift.

Henrietta Hardball: Married to Elijah Schwad. Not TSwift.

Cruella St. Shackles: Married to Marky Sweet-Puss. Not TSwift.

(Please note March 5th and the Nevis Divine/Barrington Bang-Me BV. This is the only possibility within the period for a "supporting role", namely as Nevis' unnamed girlfriend. However, Nevis is confirmed as Robert Pattinson, and there's no connection between RPattz and TSwift.)

Hilly Ho-Tox: We know she's Heidi Montag. Ted made absolutely certain everyone knew she was Heidi Montag. Not TSwift.

Pat Poisonpuss: Revealed as Lea Michele. Not TSwift.

Strawberry Snort'Em: Has a reputation for clubbing and partying. Buddies with Morgan Mayhem; they share a gay BFF. TSwift has no common gay friends with Lindsay Lohan, as far as is known. She also seems like the type who'd be averse to risking going clubbing while still underage. Not totally eliminated, but it really doesn't fit. Chances are less than 5%.

The Spie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Spie said...

Sorry, the deleted comments were all mine. Blogger's going a bit crazy on me right now. So, I'll split the proof into three parts and see if that works.

Taylor Swift was said by Ted not to be a Blind Vice on December 9th, 2009. Ted stated that she was a Blind Vice on November 10th, 2010. At this point, I will ignore Ted's statements in March about Swift being a supporting player in another BV; they will only come into play if we have multiple candidates remaining after the basic elimination.

Here are the BVs in chronological order, ignoring all BV identities that pre-date December 9th, 2009, and all obvious male BVs...you know, this is the first time I've done this with a female BV, so I'm sure that there will be a number of Devil's Advocate positions to consider...

Priscilla Desert: Bearded for Parrish Maguire, who has been confirmed to be Taylor Lautner. Two solo BVs since. We know all about Tay-Squared. In Blurry's words, Ding Ding Ding.

Secretia Ohio: Married to Chester Shorts-Off. Not TSwift.

Roxy Couture: Married to Stud-Bucket LeBoeuf. Not TSwift.

Henrietta Hardball: Married to Elijah Schwad. Not TSwift.

Cruella St. Shackles: Married to Marky Sweet-Puss. Not TSwift.

(Please note March 5th and the Nevis Divine/Barrington Bang-Me BV. This is the only possibility within the period for a "supporting role", namely as Nevis' unnamed girlfriend. However, Nevis is confirmed as Robert Pattinson, and there's no connection between RPattz and TSwift.)

Hilly Ho-Tox: We know she's Heidi Montag. Ted made absolutely certain everyone knew she was Heidi Montag. Not TSwift.

Pat Poisonpuss: Revealed as Lea Michele. Not TSwift.

The Spie said...

Part The Second:

Strawberry Snort'Em: Has a reputation for clubbing and partying. Buddies with Morgan Mayhem; they share a gay BFF. TSwift has no common gay friends with Lindsay Lohan, as far as is known. She also seems like the type who'd be averse to risking going clubbing while still underage. Not totally eliminated, but it really doesn't fit. Chances are less than 5%.

Venetia Vag-O-Matic: In a recent big hit movie and a long-standing lesbian relationship. Neither really fit TSwift. I'll call this one as Not TSwift.

Polly Luscious-Locks: Has been in multiple hit movies, which would seem to eliminate TSwift. But the AIAs...Miley and Selena? It does make you think. I'll not say Eliminated, but will put it at less than 10%.

Misha Mayhem: Morgan's sister, and we all know who Morgan is. Not TSwift.

Valyrie Tress-Trap: Plays a vampire. Not TSwift.

Jerry Menage-e-No: Another longstanding lesbian relationship and movie star. See Venetia Vag-O-Matic.

Strippa Rip-Ya: Married to Caesar Anchovy-Arse. Not TSwift.

Buella Band and possibly Kelly Guten-Shoes: In the same TV cast as Drew Smolder-n-Such, who has been proven to be Ian Somerhalder. In other words, Vampire Diaries cast members. Not TSwift.

The Spie said...

Part The Third:

Bernadine Couch-Butt: Actress involved in a casting couch situation with a movie creative force that's notorious for bedding and dumping. Not TSwift.

Bertha Rose: Has been nominated for an Oscar. Not TSwift.

Cass Stimulatia: A little too...sexually experienced to be TSwift, I think. But the virginal maintenance part does fit. The thing is, it's the only part that fits. TSwift doesn't have a "small domestic situation". Not TSwift.

Maribeth Bush: Best known for being an actress with multiple small-movie hits. Not TSwift.

(This brings us to October 6th and the first solo Priscilla BV. Remember that Ted said that TSwift has a solo BV to her name.)

Chiquita: Currently on a weekly hit TV show. Not TSwift.

She-Devil Dees: Involved with Hornius Thighs, "one of Hollywood's hottest stud-muffins", and Jerry Rock-Butt. JRB is almost certainly Justin Timberlake, and there's no connection between the two. The description of Hornius Thighs does not fit any of TSwift's SOs that we know do not have BVs (e.g., Lautner and Jakey are confirmed BVs). Not TSwift.

That brings us down to Priscilla Desert, Strawberry Snort'Em, and Polly Luscious-Locks. The latter two are simply not good fits for TSwift. No one has suggested her with any confidence for them. There have been no blatant contradictions in Bitch-Back regarding TSwift and Pris. Unless you can go Advocatus Diaboli for them, with evidence, I'm going to call this Solved.

Taylor Swift is Priscilla Desert.

The Spie said...

And a repost of Part The First since Blogger is simply not working properly for me right now (the post shows up and then disappears, and, yes, the deleted posts were my first attempt at this mess...):

Taylor Swift was said by Ted not to be a Blind Vice on December 9th, 2009. Ted stated that she was a Blind Vice on November 10th, 2010. At this point, I will ignore Ted's statements in March about Swift being a supporting player in another BV; they will only come into play if we have multiple candidates remaining after the basic elimination.

Here are the BVs in chronological order, ignoring all BV identities that pre-date December 9th, 2009, and all obvious male BVs...you know, this is the first time I've done this with a female BV, so I'm sure that there will be a number of Devil's Advocate positions to consider...

Priscilla Desert: Bearded for Parrish Maguire, who has been confirmed to be Taylor Lautner. Two solo BVs since. We know all about Tay-Squared. In Blurry's words, Ding Ding Ding.

Secretia Ohio: Married to Chester Shorts-Off. Not TSwift.

Roxy Couture: Married to Stud-Bucket LeBoeuf. Not TSwift.

Henrietta Hardball: Married to Elijah Schwad. Not TSwift.

Cruella St. Shackles: Married to Marky Sweet-Puss. Not TSwift.

(Please note March 5th and the Nevis Divine/Barrington Bang-Me BV. This is the only possibility within the period for a "supporting role", namely as Nevis' unnamed girlfriend. However, Nevis is confirmed as Robert Pattinson, and there's no connection between RPattz and TSwift.)

Hilly Ho-Tox: We know she's Heidi Montag. Ted made absolutely certain everyone knew she was Heidi Montag. Not TSwift.

Pat Poisonpuss: Revealed as Lea Michele. Not TSwift.

blurry vice said...

Spie - PERFECT! You are the pro at digging them up and analyzing.

SOLVED!

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