Blind Vice! Drugged-Out Diva Says No To Rehab!Top suspect:
Meet Soheila Stuff-It. She probably won't remember meeting you, but what difference does it really make?
‘Cause that's the way Soheila likes it—drugged up halfway to Brigadoon to escape the burdens of being the downtrodden diva that she is. And when she's not partaking in a dabble of this or a hit of that, you'll likely find her drowning at the bottom of a bottle.
It's all terribly, terribly sad. Which is why Ms. Stuff-It's peeps are desperate to get the star into treatment stat. To which the always stubborn Soheila says:
Hell, no!
See, Soheila hasn't exactly had an easy go of it lately (despite the fact that she has the most gorgeous hair!).
But instead of trying to get better or, ya know, even just talking about her issues, S2 prefers to handle things her own way. And a trip to rehab is so not on her To Do list anytime soon. Or ever, if Soheila has anything to say about it.
Which, actually, she does.
See, Ms. Stuff-It isn't a pushover. In fact, she's made a name for herself in this town by being a tough chick who doesn't back down.
Which is why we're so sad to see her destroying herself…again.
That's the other terribly, horribly sad thing about all this. This isn't the first time Soheila has spiraled. It's all happened before and even though she slapped a smile back on her face and chitchatted about how fab she was feeling, underneath Soheila was the same damaged, messed up broad she was before.
To which we say: Hey, Soheila, relapse happens. Heck, it's practically expected. But it's time you give up your pride—and partying—and straighten yourself out.
We have far more faith in you than, say, Morgan Mayhem or Mimi Kitten. And we just hate seeing you be so blasé about your life, babe.
Oh, and if you stop hooking up with bisexual men, Soheila, that too just might lead you on the way to recovery, just a suggestion!
AND IT AIN'T: Angelina Jolie, Kim Richards, Mischa Barton
Friday, January 27, 2012
Blind Vice! Drugged-Out Diva Says No To Rehab!
New from Ted today -
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Blind Vice: Chuck Finger Dingle Returns...
New BV from Ted Friday Jan 20 -
Blind Vice: Sexual Carnivore Charlotte Switches Teams for a Great Movie Role!
We've already all fallen in love with Charlotte "Chuck" Finger-Dingle and her sexually impressive resume of bedding Hollywood's power gals. This particular beauty seems to thrive and simply glow inside the more women she beds, but guess what?
Chuck's also got a hot career going, which actually means more to her than her ambitious (and athletic) love life, so Charlotte just added something very different to her woman-eating Hollywood climb:
A man.
Yep, that's right! And, of course, not just any man, but a very, very powerful and über-talented man!
One who just happens to be directing Charly in her latest project. But that's not all.
Wanna know what's really weird about this one? No, not that Chuck has so seamlessly switched from women to men just for the sake of a great role (trust us, lots of celebs have made that switch in this town for far less than a spectacular role), but the fact that Chuck's new man has a woman who's totally OK with this arrangement!
Uh, are we watching a real-life episode of Sex and the City, only with Chucky's lover's other half doing the same thing Samantha would?
Apparently.
Either that or the director's woman knows full well that Charly's first preference is for the ladies, and she'll be bored diddling the director dude soon enough.
Only problem is, the way Charly's hanging all over her lover in public (not to mention in private), that sexual fade-out doesn't appear to be occurring anytime soon.
AND IT AIN'T: Jennifer Lawrence, Naya Rivera, Dakota Fanning
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Blind Vice: Loveless Topher Lusts Away the Hours!
New from Ted yesterday, January 13 -
Blind Vice: Loveless Topher Lusts Away the Hours!
Isn't it funny when somebody like Strawberry Snort 'Em appears to have it all: Devoted and cute BF? Check. Cool digs? Beyond-average talent? Check. Back-stabbing besties? Check! But when the love affair busts up, Strawberry stops eating and starts snorting even more, so sad!
But, this Vice isn't about Strawberry, it's about a dude who never, ever wants to be in Strawberry's lovelorn position: Topher Hairy-Tuchus.
And even though Topher's determined to not get caught in love again (he's had a couple of bad breakups), he's not at all averse to getting caught in lust:
As we first told you,Topher's into the anonymous sex thing. And whereas we used to think it was just because Mr. Hairy-Tuchus, like many men in Hollywood, is just a plain ol' closeted actor, well, that's not the only reason he likes to get it on with other guys on the down low.
"He's just done with love, that's all. It's not so much his career, which is what everyone thinks," says a pal who knows Topher both personally, and professionally.
Whoa. So Topher's not so designing in the love department as much as we first thought? Amazing!
Because Topher sure has been giving us all a run for his red-carpet money lately with various sexy ladies by his side—and then some.
"No, no, no," added our Topher source. "He's just horny. And permanently non-committed. It's really that simple. The chicks are a cover for his [sex], not so much his career, get it?"
Do we ever. And here we thought Hairy-Tuchus was some kind of grand, scheming Toothy Tile, who knew!
Just remember, Toph, play safe!
And It Ain't: Ashton Kutcher, Jamie Foxx, Ryan Gosling
Friday, January 6, 2012
Blind Vice: Jerry Rock-Butt's Bitter Heart!
Happy new year! We are getting caught up on the first week of the new year. So much gossip already - Divorces, engagements, and pregnancies! We'll be covering all of it... let's start with Justin Timberlake shall we? Here's Ted's latest Blind Vice, from today in Awful Truth.
Please refer to the label below for a link to our posts on the previous JRB and CJ BVs, including a full list of who has been eliminated.
Top suspects: still Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel
(older ex-girlfriend: NOT Britney Spears. Top suspect = Cameron Diaz)
Blind Vice: Jerry Rock-Butt's Bitter Heart!
Über-talented and fab Jerry Rock-Butt is publicly known for being a superstar, but privately, he's known for his super moods. Most recently? Even though Jerry's life is currently all roses—professionally and romantically—those who know Mr. Rock-Butt most personally are fully aware that he's been a bit down, as of late.
Pray tell, why?
Because as he gets closer and closer to sealing the deal with his current girlfriend, only the stud's best pals know that Jerry's true heart still lies with a super hot ex girlfriend Jer came very close to marrying.
Back when Jerry and this curvy gal were a hotter-than-hot couple, Jerry's mama was incensed that her baby boy was hooking up with an older chick who wasn't so far in age from her own!
Well, maybe incensed is too strong of a word to use at first, but it sure as hell wasn't once the ex and Jer started talking marriage! Mama Rock-Butt practically hit the roof! It was only a matter of time, then, before Jerry and this more voluptuous GF of his not only stopped talking marriage, but they broke up altogether.
And the mama's boy has seriously missed his old flame ever since, particularly now that he's on the verge of marrying blah GF Chutney Jones, who when compared to the vibrant, always-horny lover from his past, gets blown right outta the water. Babes are beyond different.
And nobody knows this more than Jerry, who fears he may have lost the love of his life.
Everybody can cry now, if they want, but I say this is just karma for letting your mommy arrange your love life.
And It Ain't: Justin Theroux, Mark Walhberg, Matthew Morrison
Please refer to the label below for a link to our posts on the previous JRB and CJ BVs, including a full list of who has been eliminated.
Top suspects: still Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel
(older ex-girlfriend: NOT Britney Spears. Top suspect = Cameron Diaz)
Friday, December 23, 2011
Blind Vice! Rockstar Reeks of Playboy Ways!
New from Ted today -
Blind Vice! Rockstar Reeks of Playboy Ways!
You'd think that buckets of moolah, tons of adoring fans and a hot chick at your side would be enough.
Not so for Lesley Grotto, one of those swoon-worthy rock star types with the slick moves and killer abs. See, Les has all of that (including a knockout gal most dudes would kill to canoodle with) but—surprise! surprise!—he wants more, more, more.
Especially when it comes to chicks. ‘Cause let's be honest...
Lesley is a straight up dawg!
You wouldn't know it though because when he's around his "special" lady (especially when there are cameras around) Lesley is the image of a doting boyfriend—ya know, lovey dovey kisses and all the "awwww"-inducing crapola.
But when she's out of sight, she's definitely out of mind too.
Which leaves Lesley to do what he does best: sweet talking the panties off of any (and every) chick in sight.
"He's a total d-bag," one of the pretty party gals who attended one of the many booze-soaked event that Grotto frequents bitched to us. "He's all over chicks at these parties and flirts with everyone."
Continues our blabbermouth babe: "But as soon as he's with his woman he's a whole different man, all committed and monogamous."
Sounds smarmy. Well, actually, that totally sounds like half the other dudes in Tinseltown.
Here's the real Q though: If his lady found out would be really even care? We kinda think not.
AND IT AIN'T: Jason Mraz, Kanye West, Bruno Mars
Friday, December 16, 2011
Blind Vice: During Awards Season, the King Forgets His Queen Days
New BV from Ted today. Schlong returns...
Blind Vice: During Awards Season, the King Forgets His Queen Days
Some dudes like Crotch Uh-Lastic and Toothy Tile, we really feel for. These are movie stars who truly do only like other guys, even though they also (just as much) want to be renowned film actors. So they play the game (well, Toothy does).
But then there's mischievous bisexual King Schlong, who can take boys—or go without them.
So, what's King's current sexual bent? And could the dog-eat-dog awards season have something to do with King's choice?
Girls, girls, girls and yes, yes, yes.
You see, truth be known, King's always fooled around with both sexes (as recently as this year, too!). But it's really not what drives King ultimately romantically—and certainly not come the career-defining months from Emmys to Oscars.
"That boy will no sooner go around boys when these awards are still out than Alec Baldwin will apologize to American Airlines," said one of King's myriad Biz colleagues, who knows full well that Schlong has long been a free spirit and doesn't want to be tied down to either sex, in any capacity.
But this maverick sensibility, we're told, is wholly heterosexually infused, at this time of the year because what King wants more than domestic happiness is...big ol' trophy-time recognition. "Like, bad," is how it was put to us.
Jeez. Kinda sounds like that old stereotype people are always applying to women only in this town, like, she slept her way to the top.
Apparently, King's desperately trying it out, too.
But will it work?
And It Ain't: Alex Pettyfer, Kellan Lutz, Alec Baldwin
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Blind Vice! Crafty Carol Anne Sausage-Snatcher Plans For a Surprise Baby!
New from Ted Monday Dec 12 -
Blind Vice! Crafty Carol Anne Sausage-Snatcher Plans For a Surprise Baby!
You all remember Carol Anne Sausage-Snatcher, right?
She was the chick who couldn't quite keep her hands to herself despite the fact that she has an oh-so-loving (and pretty damn hunky) guy at home.
Well, Car has had a change of heart. And it all has to do with her best gal-pal, Carmelita Salami-Climber.
Let's back up a bit: Remember how Carm's close friends were worried that her dude wasn't up to snuff?
Well they were right and he hit the road, leaving Carmelita to nurse her broken heart (trust us, that split is so not worth a Vice in itself).
Here's the thing: While Carol Anne lets her bestie cry on her shoulder, she's secretly scheming how to keep her own relationship together...ya know, so she doesn't end up like her forever alone amigo.
That's right: Carol Anne is getting her s--t together!
And the first plan of action? Get herself knocked up pronto.
Carol Anne has convinced herself that if she can get her man to get her preggo, everything will shape up in their sometimes rocky relaysh. As in, she'll stop parting and then they'll stop fighting.
How terribly old fashioned of her, no?!
And It Ain't: Naya Rivera, Jennifer Aniston, Blake Lively
Lainey - Cash Only
New from Lainey yesterday Dec 14 -
Top suspect: Lindsay Lohan
Cash Only
SO easy.
Who was paid $15,000 in cash this week in exchange for frolicking around in her bikini on the beach? That’s a lot of cash money for you and me, true. But for them? It’s change. It’s really, really not much. In that world, it’s almost nothing. Consider that Tori Spelling supposedly charges at least 4 times that for a photo op with her kids and you get a sense of how low this piece of sh-t is scraping these days. She used to be able to throw that much away on a night out.
Oh and by the way, it had to be cash. She was super hard up for the cash. What are some of the things one might pay for in cash only?
Top suspect: Lindsay Lohan
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Blind Vice: Brucey's Juicy Double Life!
New BV from Ted on Fri Dec 9. A newcomer! -
Blind Vice: Brucey's Juicy Double Life!
Brucey Huskers is a gorgeous star. Brucey's hot. Brucey has a super-bitchin', manly body. Brucey hangs with other equally luscious-lookin' Tinseltown (and Blind Vice star) celebrities, who he's gotten mucho intimate with.
So, why is Brucey having trouble getting some lovin' lately?
Oh, wait. That rumor that he's not getting any since his big Hollywood split turns out to be...
Just that, a rumor!
"Don't you realize that this explains everything a little bit more clearly?" said one of the dudes who hangs thisclose alongside the humpy celebrity, who's gone back to getting it on with guys (something he did before his latest sexy starlet romance), since his latest publicized romance went sour.
"Ever stop to think why these 'relationships' of his don't last," asked Brucey's equally handsome bud, rhetorically. "Only a guy who's into guys would go out with the women this guy's gone out with," bitched the Huskers hanger-on.
Now, if you're able to follow the logic here, it pretty much makes sense: Brucey hooks up with Hollywood gals who are gorgeous but who he knows he has zilcho in common with. Everyone's shocked when it doesn't work out, as both parties are almost always super hot! Leaving the public breathless and waiting for the next hetero hook-up.
So, what gives?
Just that Brucey wants to keep getting in on with the guys even though he tells even himself it's the chickers he's really wanting.
Uh, so not the case.
But, Brucey will be the last to know this.
AND IT AIN'T: Ashton Kutcher, Sean Penn, Charlie Sheen
Saturday, December 3, 2011
Blind Vice: Why Are Gals Passing On Well Equipped Player?
New BV from Ted Friday...
Blind Vice: Why Are Gals Passing On Well Equipped Player?
Poor, poor Smokey Shooter. First, he and his gal couldn't really work out the domestic thing, then he and his honey called it quits, oh, no!
They were such a cute couple. But you'll either be really sad or really happy to hear Smokey's wasted no time in moving on from his ex lady-love. Only problem being his new love interests all seem to have the same two complaints about the good-lookin' actor with a fair amount of movie cred:
Actually, make that one and a half complaints, because some gals aren't so bothered by one of this dude's, uh, problems, as it were. Namely, that he's just too big. And we're not talkin' just the guy's ego, honeys.
Add to that sometime painful attribute the fact that Smokey has a fondness for solving his flatulence issues while in bed with his various women.
Result? Some gals pretend not to notice. Others scold Smokey with mock disbelief. Few are so upset they don't give Smokey another go. In fact, make that all.
Which is probably why Smokey's never seemed to really care about giving his women warning, once he finds himself on the verge of breaking wind.
OK, I understand why a lotta gals put up with crap like not lifting the toilet seat, but, why more babes don't give this babe grief for acting like he's in a Jim Carrey movie is beyond me.
Does size really matter that much?
And It Ain't: Ryan Reynolds, Hugh Hefner, Leonardo DiCaprio
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Page Six - Just Asking
From NY Post Nov 28 -
Which supposedly sober rock star was spotted at a high-end gala schmoozing the tables and surreptitiously swilling all the other guests’ wine? . . .
Which mogul was shaking with rage at his assistant when the peon took too long to run into Shake Shack to get him a burger while the boss man waited in his Town Car? . . .
Which younger brother of an infamous socialite appears in a hardcore gay sex tape that’s making the rounds in the male modeling world?
Which supposedly sober rock star was spotted at a high-end gala schmoozing the tables and surreptitiously swilling all the other guests’ wine? . . .
Which mogul was shaking with rage at his assistant when the peon took too long to run into Shake Shack to get him a burger while the boss man waited in his Town Car? . . .
Which younger brother of an infamous socialite appears in a hardcore gay sex tape that’s making the rounds in the male modeling world?
Friday, November 25, 2011
Blind Vice! Starlet Prefers Locking Lips With Ladies Over A-List Dudes
New BV from Ted today -
Blind Vice! Starlet Prefers Locking Lips With Ladies Over A-List Dudes
Charlotte "Chuck" Finger-Dingle is young, über-gorge and has H'wood by the family jewels (metaphorically speakin', at least).
See, Chuck is still relatively fresh to the scene but she's managed to nab some of the splashiest flicks served up by the biggest studios and has certainly caught the eye of Tinseltown—and all the eligible bachelors in it too.
But all that steamy hetero chemistry Chuck has onscreen stays strictly in celluloid, ‘cause Chuck has a taste for...
The ladies, of course.
Chuck has sparked her fair share of rumored romances with T-town's hottest fellas (more than a fair share of which are also members of the Blind Vice Hall of Fame), but when it comes down to whose bed she's hopping in and out of, Charlotte prefers her lovers strictly chick.
Which isn't to say Chuck gets lonely during those long months on location.
Oh no, Chuck—with her fashionista figure and cheekbones to kill for—has plenty of ladies lustin' after her as well and makes sure to pluck only the hottest babe from the crowd to keep her, well, "entertained."
So while the tabloids plaster their covers with snapshots of Chuck and her ab-tastic male costars, the real juicy scandal is going on behind the scene where CF-D is getting hot and heavy with one lucky gal or another.
And her usual same-sex selection? Women with power—ya know, like directors or producers or any broad who's calling the shots.
How friggin' hot is that? Keep it up, Chuck, ‘cause even if you don't win an Oscar, you're certainly one of our new fave Vicers.
AND IT AIN'T: Ashley Greene, Lily Collins, Lea Michele
Lainey - They're creeping everyone out
Happy Thanksgiving fellow Americans! We are getting caught up with gossip. Here is a new Lainey blind riddle, written by her co-blogger Sarah On November 23 -
Top suspect:
They're creeping everyone out
This director doesn’t have a reputation for engaging in tomfoolery on his sets, and this starlet has no reputation at all, yet they’ve been raising eyebrows with their vaguely off-putting relationship, which is inching into “professionally inappropriate” territory. Their weird fascination with one another is making some folks wonder if they could become a liability while promoting their film. She’s infatuated but he’s playing Pygmalion, a scenario that always ends messily. Someone should warn her, bless her little heart.
Top suspect:
Saturday, November 19, 2011
IMDB Mystery Woman
I was going to make a post about this when I read the news article a few weeks ago. Makes a mini blind item. However, I just thought it was plain boring. Now this week, Ted made a post about it. So, if anyone wants to discuss this, here you go. Here is Ted's post ... discuss away!
Help Us Crack the Code: Who's the IMDB Mystery Woman?
You know we live to dish about anything mysterious here at the A.T.
So, when we got the scoop on the IMDb mystery woman, we had to start a little guessing game of our own.
Even though Amazon.com thinks they know whodunit, we think you Awful readers are the best detectives of all.
Here's what we do know:
The woman's original suit reveals she's an Asian woman, residing in Texas, who's around 40 years old.
We also know the woman claims she lost out on loads of roles after the site revealed her true age, so we're searching for a much younger-lookin' gal who's not at the top of her Tinsel Town game. Now onto the guessing...
Could it be Lucy Liu? Girl's career did peak after her role in Charlie's Angels, and she does look much younger than her real age, 43. But the gal has had a steady flow of jobs regardless of her birth date, so it seems unlikely she would resort to a lawsuit.
Or, what about Maggie Q? For starters, she's gorgeous, and her current IMDb profile reveals she's 32 years old. Come to think of it, a pretty face like that would be devastated if the world knew she was really pushing 40. Then again, she's got a solid gig as Nikita, so maybe she is 32, after all.
But maybe, Kelly Hu is a better guess? The one-time Miss Teen USA has been working in H'wood forever, but no doubt, she hasn't starred in a hottie role for some time. Plus, her age is listed as 43, and according to the mystery woman, that would make her, say, totally expired in Hollywood?
But if Kelly hasn't hit her expiration date, perhaps we should look at Sandra Oh? Girl's age is listed at 40 years old, but she doesn't seem the type to buy into the exhausting and sadly ridiculous (but true) H'wood ageism thing. On the other hand, maybe she's worried about a gig, post-Grey's Anatomy?
Or perhaps, this mystery woman has us all fooled and she's got just one measly 1988 movie-of-the week to her credit and she just started the whole friggin' thing for publicity?
Sound off, Awful readers, and let us know who you think the mystery woman is!
Friday, November 18, 2011
Blind Vice: Gay Star's Clueless Beard Walks In On a Shocker!
New BV from Ted today -
Blind Vice: Gay Star's Clueless Beard Walks In On a Shocker!
People have a right to live their lives, let's be clear about that. And that's why we do not out gay stars at AT, never have, never will.
But when matinee idols like Toothy Tile and Fey Oil-Tush choose to involve other, non-gay folks in their clandestine lives, it changes the rules.
For instance, Crescent Kumquat's latest beard was beginning to wonder why the heck the handsome star never laid a finger on her in private. Well, she just found out the reason the hard way:
When the gorgeous, tall stunner Crescent had been parading around to parties just happened to hop over to her man's place to surprise him (and she found that he was not only home, but, the place was pretty open). Only it was she who got the shock when she walked in on Crescent having sex with a dude!
And not just a little petting or oral action, either, babes, Crescent was right in the middle of getting done to him what the gorgeous, real-blonde chica had wished he would do to her!
Now, we gotta say we're starting to wonder just how much dope Crescent's doing these days, because not even outlandish sex Vice Super-stars like Toothy and Crotch Uh-Lastic take this many chances—you know, like leaving the house wide open while getting it on with a guy inside.
But then who'd have thunk the gf would come over for a surprise? Well, all the more reason to actually give these beards a little lovin' once in awhile, boys. Ya know, so they're not so damn horny!
But the discarded chica does get the last laugh, we must note. Won't be getting that nasty social disease Mr. Kumquat's known to have, whew!
Wonder if that latest blondie CC's been out with will be as lucky?
AND IT AIN'T: Tom Sturridge, Charlie Sheen, Robert Pattinson
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Blind Vice: Jackie Bouffant Cuts It So Close!
And this one was new from Ted on Friday Nov 11 -
Blind Vice: Jackie Bouffant Cuts It So Close!
Jackie Bouffant, still young, still beautiful, seems to have already run the Hollywood gamut in his brief career: boys, drugs, not to mention the requisite "beard." As in a red-carpet girlfriend he loves to trot out for the paparazzi and mainstream press.
But that was so yesterday.
Today, Jackie's got some totally homo cajones on him!
Just like Toothy Tile once sported the young man he adored, it looks like Jackie's showing off his, too! Hot!
At a recent very glitzy Hollywood event, Jackie was likewise very obvious. And trust us, Jackie's not a silly, stupid boy like Parrish Maguire, who doesn't always triple-check where he hooks up.
So what happened?
There Jackie was, A-list everybody all around him, hitting the top of the press line with his new boyfriend in tow. Only Mr. B. stopped just short of walking the carpet with cutie-pie BF, who has the most adorable curly coif and darling rosy cheeks.
Jackie, instead, had his dude walk around the carpet. And then guess what the TV and movie star did, once he finished walking the press line? He picked his boyfriend up at the end! It was totally like they were pulling some kind of playground game, too cute!
Only it was hardly grade-school stuff, once the newbie couple rejoined inside the party: With all the giggling and rubbing up against each other they were doing, who needed those outdoor heat lamps?
Funny thing, whenever an in-house photog tried to get Jackie and his man, the BF split faster than Brett Ratner chomps shrimp cocktail.
Smart man, he'll be by Jackie's side for years (or months) to come, we predict.
And It Ain't: Taylor Lautner, Chace Crawford, Robert Pattinson
Blind Vice: Sugar-Rod O'Keefe Chooses an Anti-Gay Director... on Purpose
Just getting caught up for the entire week... bear with us! This BV was from Tuesday Nov 8, from Awful Truth...
Blind Vice: Sugar-Rod O'Keefe Chooses an Anti-Gay Director... on Purpose
Sugar-Rod O'Keefe is nothing new in Hollywood. He's a star who makes a lot of money—and he loves spending it on hookers, both male and female. If you only knew how common this story is Tinseltown!
But something even less known than Sugar-Rod's sexual preference is how anti-gay most of O'Keefe's professional colleagues are, something Sugar not only doesn't mind but thrives on:
"He thinks it makes him less of a target for people thinking he's gay," said a longtime male hooker who's been paid by O'Keefe for years, "if he hangs out with guys who are telling homophobic jokes."
Hmmm. Guess this type of sexuality subterfuge makes guys who simply have beards for girlfriends look like down-right simpletons!
"He really does think this helps keeps the heat off him," added the guy prostitute, who added that Sugar-Rod indeed has a major thing for highly orchestrated sex, i.e., lots of "role playing."
So, guess it makes sense Mr. O'Keefe (who's been a top box-office draw at various points in his career) also likes to orchestrate his sexual politics in real life!
Which makes us wonder if those tacky gay jokes O'Keefe's director has been known to make aren't also to help get the gay-focus of his star?
You know, in a totally effed up Hollywood kind of way.
And It Ain't: Jake Gyllenhaal, Tom Cruise, Colin Farrell
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Blind Vice: Bi Guy Grabs Slutty Beard to Protect A-List Boyfriend
New from Ted yesterday -
Please see the label below for a link to the previous Nevis and Barrington BVs, including a full list of who has been eliminated as Nevis.
Top suspects:
Nevis Devine = Robert Pattinson
Barrington Bang-Me = Tom Sturridge
slutty beard = Sienna Miller
Blind Vice: Bi Guy Grabs Slutty Beard to Protect A-List Boyfriend
We knew something didn't make sense!
When the deliciously sexy (and untraditional) movie star Nevis Devine started hanging out less with his on/off boyfriend, the almost-as-handsome Barrington Bang-Me, we thought it was just the natural ebb of Nevis' libido.
He's more into girls than guys, after all.
But then we discovered the downtime between the guys was far more to do with Barrington's master plot! Oh, what a tangled web these bisexual boys can weave!
Not that long ago, Barrington hooked up with a pretty visible gal. This was right around the time people were started to wonder what the hell's going on with the two guys, anyway.
But, no more! Bare's new babe (who's been around almost as much as Nevis has, hmm...) took care of those rumors.
However—surprise, surprise—things are rotten between Barrington and the beard.
But, what really is a surprise is the fact that we just discovered: Mr. Bang-Me only took up with said honey because he didn't want to endanger Nevis's career, he didn't give a you-know-what about his own reputation.
Oh, my.
Is this love?
And It Ain't: Jake Gyllenhaal, Hugh Grant, Alexander Skarsgård
Please see the label below for a link to the previous Nevis and Barrington BVs, including a full list of who has been eliminated as Nevis.
Top suspects:
Nevis Devine = Robert Pattinson
Barrington Bang-Me = Tom Sturridge
slutty beard = Sienna Miller
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