Friday, August 27, 2010

Blind Vice: Wet 'n' Wild Parrish Dries Himself Off

New from Ted today -

Taylor Lautner (The Twilight Saga's "Jacob") -- Rolling Stone Magazine Cover PosterBlind Vice: Wet 'n' Wild Parrish Dries Himself Off

If any of Parrish Maguire's close (and all very beautiful) friends are wondering why their blushing-boy companion has been on the rag as of late, we can tell you: He's been duly chastised by his "people," and he ain't happy about it.
For some silly reason, Parrish's peeps were in an uproar about their client liking to get his sexy on with porn stars at private pool parties or liking to tag around his tortured BF at parties while he made goo-goo eyes at all the (other) pretty boys.
Parrish's advisors therefore advised:
"Reel it in, or else."
P-stuff, all crimson cheeks and quivering lower lip, did not question what the else referred to. He very well knew: The sizeable investment his employers had made in him would suddenly disappear faster than Lindsay Lohan's 9-to-5 gigs.
Also intimated to Mr. Maquire, who's gotten quite used to being the hot-stuff flavor of the month, was a reminder that he was hardly the first choice for the plum position he now enjoys.
Consequently, P.M. has been pulling the sour stuff on his close friends, taking out the frustration of no longer being able to get his gay on quite so openly on those unlucky enough to enjoy the gorgeous dude's myriad perks. As a result, partying it up with Parrish ain't at all what it used to be.
So, suffice it to say: Since P has had to zip his pants, his lip ain't following suit.

And It Ain't: Chris Hemsworth, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ryan Gosling

Links to 3 previous Parrish Maguire BVs:
1 - Jan 2010 including a full list of who has been eliminated
2 - March 2010
3 - June 2010

And here is the 5th, most recent PM BV from Sept 2010.

Top suspect: Taylor Lautner

* Proven by timeline of Ted's dates he was and wasn't a BV: Taylor Lautner

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

New BV Superstar Gallery

Ted has made a new Blind Vice Superstar Gallery!

He really just added 5 new people on to the old gallery of 25.  The 5 new people are: Nicole Kidman, Kristen Stewart, Robin Leach, Eva Longoria, and Alec Baldwin.  We already new about 3 of these.  The only new info is about Robin Leach and Eva Longoria.  We already knew the others were Blind Vices before this.

So, this confirms our beliefs that Robin Leach is Moisty Mohr.  Ted said that Moisty Mohr is one of the people in the gallery.  That's a reveal!  And Eva Longoria is still a top suspect for Secretia Ohio.  (See labels at the right.) 

 Here is the new one with 30 superstars.  And for a refresher here is the old one from 9/11/09, with the first 25 superstars.
Also, here is our discussion on the 1st list of 25.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Blind Vice: Harland Fuss' Triumphant Return!

And oldie but goodie returns!  New from Ted yesterday -

Blind Vice: Harland Fuss' Triumphant Return!

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN ORLANDO BLOOM NEW MOVIE POSTER(Size 27"x39")How interesting how low our Toothy-Tile-era, wildly talked about bisexual Blind boy Harland Fuss chose to lay for several years. So much so, he decided to go and get married! Gosh, do you think Harland really isn't into the boys, anymore?
Well, you know, certain habits die hard:
See, Harland just decided—based on his continued ho-hum career performance—that he needed to amp things up a bit. And if he couldn't haul out any more blockbuster projects, he'd simply try the get-married-and-procreate path. After all, that sometimes works for fading, closeted gay stars who are looking for a tabloid leg-up with their popularity, right?
Uh, not always, as poor Fey Oiled-Tush has discovered. But, we digress.
Harland just hasn't been able to quash his man-on-man desires (hard as he's tried, poor thing). And what with his career hitting the back-burner 'n' all, he decided not that long ago that he'd do the domestic dance, find a chick to fake-tango with and see if he could muster back up that ol' bedroom eyes thing. Onscreen, mind you.
Because the deal is (and, trust, there is a deal here, folks) that Harland's beard was promised a career-boost herself, in the arrangement. And she, like a lot of desperate wannabes in this business, bit. In fact, she chomped on the behind-the-scenes opportunity so fast, Mr. Fuss, always a more thoughtful dude than Tinseltown's used to, wondered what the hell he'd gotten himself into.
But it was far too late to go back on his devil-dealing scenario.
And It Ain't: John Krasinski, Ryan Reynolds, Jerry O'Connell

Here is the link to our discussion on the old Harland Fuss BV from Oct 2004, including a list of who has been eliminated.

* Top suspect: Orlando Bloom

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Blind Vice: Sloppy Sexts Put Baller in Tiger Territory!

New from Ted yesterday -

Blind Vice: Sloppy Sexts Put Baller in Tiger Territory!

Family HuddleYou didn't think Tiger Woods was the only "nice guy" athlete playing way dirty behind the scenes, did ya?
Meet Pepper Harthman, an all-American ball player, praised for his charitable work and family-man demeanor. At least that's the public's opinion of this idolized star and, clearly, appearances aren't always what they seem if you've wound up in our Blind Vice section.
But, poor Pepper just doesn't know how to curb his naughty desires:
Good-lookin' Pep, like most famous athletes, just can't keep it in his über tight pants. So what else is new, right?
Well, the fact that he's got a doting family, as well as an apple-pie image, doesn't exactly helps things here. Also problematic to Pepper's PR image would be his myriad cheating hook-ups while he's on the road and one of those chicks who's now blabbing about it!
How unfortunate it is when a girl who you've been sticking it to—and who has messages to prove such—is threatening to go to the media with these electronic boobie-traps? Uh, then Mr. Harthman, it's time to get out your checkbook.
Which is exactly what we're hearing Pepper and his handlers may be scrambling to do.
Harthman's teammates (owners included) know about his extracurricular activities and are way worried what will happen when this all gets exposed, because, trust us, it is.
"It's only a matter of time before it all comes out," says our super worried sports source on the inside.
P.H.'s team is one of the best of the best, thanks to Harthman's skills, and they all know how quickly that will go away if their star's good-guy demeanor is shattered. His head will never be in the game, and considering he is one of the most valuable players, you can kiss those championship rings goodbye.
Woods is the prime example! We're approaching a year since Tiger's escapades were exposed, and the onetime all-star has hardly recovered.
So can money really fix Pepper's probs? Clock's a tickin', and we're dying to find out.

And it Ain't: Kobe Bryant, Matt Hasselbeck, Roger Clemens

Update 12/17/11 - Ted has eliminated Kobe Bryant, Matt Hasselbeck, Roger Clemens, Lebron James, Lance Armstrong, David Beckham, Wayne Rooney, Brett Favre, all major league baseball players, Cole Hamels, Drew Brees, Troy Polamalu, Tony Parker, Tiki Barber, Jay Cutler, Tony Romo.

* Top suspects:  Eli Manning

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Buzzfoto Blind Item #374

This B list comedian/actor didn’t leave patrons laughing when he left a restaurant several nights ago. The poor guy who has been struggling with sobriety showed up to dinner already half plastered and continued to drink throughout the night. He was escorted out before dessert for pulling down his pants and rubbing up against a waiter.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

We're on Twitter and Facebook!

Hey everyone.  Interrupting your gossip for a little announcement.  We are now on Twitter!  Follow us if you are too.

Also, for those on Facebook, please stop by our page and "Like" us if you haven't already.

Thanks y'all!

Friday, August 13, 2010

Blind Vice: Bernie Screws Only Herself in the End!

New from Ted today -

TransformersBlind Vice: Bernie Screws Only Herself in the End!

It's the oldest story in Hollywood: sex for hire. But unlike some other Blind Vice candidates we've covered over the sleazy years, Bernadine Couch-Butt's Tinseltown rise didn't involve any sex that was contractually required. Bernie snagged her big, successful horny director man the old-fashioned way: wearing a nightie. Yep, a see-through job just happened to be what Bernadine was wearing when they first met, lucky for Bernie.
Because she's now well on her way to donning equally lusty outfits in...
A meaty role in Attack of the Mopey Mothballs, her lover's latest über-gizmoed-out mega hit!
Funny, though, nobody'll ever really remember Bernie, once Mothballs V, VI and VII come out, a fact Bernadine's blithely dismissing from her pretty little head. But Bernie and big director man are still going at it—on the set, on call, on the funny stuff, whenever and wherever! Who needs to think about things like a future when you're getting laid and you're famous all at the same time, right?
Well, Bernie sure should.
Nobody's getting hurt in this adults-only game; neither lover has a steady partner. But what's totally rich in this typical Hollywood story is how totally fried Bernie's going to get once she's tossed aside, as she will be.
We're only going by experience here when we say this. You see, every one of Bernie's legions of predecessors have not only been ruthlessly discarded by their horny hiring dude, but they've been tarnished and black-listed, as a result.
Only one of these women has survived the taint and gone on to make a name for herself.
Not great odds for our poor, gorgeous Ms. Couch-Butt.

And It Ain't: Ashley Greene, Blake Lively, Vanessa Hudgens

Update 8/16 - Ted says "No B.V. for the babe who survived this sleezy scheme".

* Top suspects: Rosie Huntington-Whiteley (featuring Michael Bay and ?)

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Mini Twilight blind

Twilight (Two-Disc Special Edition)Today in the Awful Truth, Taryn Ryder slipped in this little mini Twilight blind at the end of her article about the new movie Vampires Suck.

As for whether Lanter has had any negative feedback from the cast about their new movie, he says not yet.
"I'm not even sure if they all know about it."
Well some do...we heard one New Moon cast member was quite catty when she ran into the babe who is playing "her" in Vampires Suck. But surely you all don't want to hear about that, right?

Read the rest of the article and Taryn's interview with Matt Lanter here.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Gossip Boy - 8.3.10

From The Gossip Boy last week -

Famewhore Farrah spends most of her time in front of the cameras. If not filming, then being "caught" by paparazzi while she spends quality time with her offspring. Farrah holds a strong front up while out and has been struggling to maintain the career that she wants, though her box-office numbers have dove down almost as fast as her weight. FF is also a back stabbing whore who sleeps with any man that she can get her claws in. Her latest beau was a set-up that she had planned for a long time. No matter that he had a wife and a baby on the way. But once his wife lost the baby, she sank her claws in and snatched him away. FF has a dark and twisted past, one that she has tried to distance herself from for years. But the problem is that Famewhore had a baby at a very young age with a man that she NEVER should have been sleeping with. Farrah gave the baby up for adoption and has tried to make up for it ever since. But word on the street is that FF's little love child is gunning for her. Farrah could never deny it, the girl looks like Farrah cloned herself. But FF knows that no matter what she has done in the present, if her little secrets came out her entire reputation would be flushed. Not to mention that her hunky honey would probably take half of his and roll out. Quite a web we weave, Famewhore Farrah. Should have kept those secrets locked up like Fort Knox, because your people are talking. And if they are worried, you should be too.
It's not: Cameron Diaz, Nicole Kidman, Katie Holmes


* Top suspect: Angelina Jolie

Buzzfoto Blind Item #365

Getting caught up on some from last week.  This one is from 8/3/10 -

Buzzfoto Blind Item #365
This Disney star was seen downing some Vatrex in the bathroom of a recent club. The star was under 21 and probably shouldn’t have been at the club in the first place.
Not Miley Cyrus.

Buzzfoto Blind Item #366

From 8/4/10 -

Buzzfoto Blind Item #366
This aging star who recently got a part in film with other vintage names, is so excited to be reintroduced into the business, he went on a gigantic cocaine bender over the weekend. He invited hoards of young girls back to his hotel room and the group partied all night.
Not Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Buzzfoto Blind Item #367

From last week, 8/5/10

Buzzfoto Blind Item #367
This actor, whose big break came from an HBO series thought it would be a good idea to expand his repertoire three weekends or so ago. We’re not talking so much about his acting career, we’re talking about his sinful behavior. He told sources later he was investigating for a role, but he decided to cruising in a local park. Instead of finding a partner, he found someone who offered him loads of drugs. He took them, but only for his ‘acting role’ of course.
Not Jonathan Rhys Meyers.

Buzzfoto Blind Item #368

From Buzzfoto today -

Buzzfoto Blind Item #368
This young and talented actress is going to star in a movie where the role requires she do something drastic to her appearance. She refused to do it at first because it requires a shaved head. No wigs or makeup, but really shaving off her hair. The movie is said to get some Oscar buzz, so she talked it over with PR and is going to do it. The only sad thing is, the person who she is secretly dating right now has threatened to dump her if she does. No joke. We think she’s better off without him.
Not Leighton Meester.

CDAN - 8.6.10

From Crazy Days and Nights last week -

Four For Friday

#1 #2 & #3- This C list movie actress who used to be right on the verge of A list at one time has been in this space before. After a short break she has restarted her S&M service for the discerning celebrities. One of her new employees is a favorite of this A list celebutard who is married to a B+/A- list movie actress. The reason she is a favorite? Looks like his wife, but does things his wife does not.

#1 - C list movie actress
#2 - Celebutard
#3 - B+/A- movie actress

#4 & #5 - This B- movie actor is a very good looking guy. Well most people think he is. I think he looks like he takes steroids. Anyway. His celebutante wife is usually stuck to his side like glue. One day she wasn't though and he came home with the gift that keeps on giving. She will never ever leave him though because she worked and worked to get him to marry her after a string of other celebrity relationships did not quite get her to the altar.

#4 - Actor
#5 - Wife


Friday, August 6, 2010

Blind Vice: The TV Cast That Vices Together, Stays Together!

New from Ted today...

The Vampire Diaries: The Complete Second SeasonBlind Vice: The TV Cast That Vices Together, Stays Together!

Here's an Awful Truth first: This entire friggin' cast is in on the Vice! But instead of focusing on the entire group, we decided to introduce you to the three biggest troublemakers, 'cause we know they'll be making future appearances.
So let's welcome Buella Bland, Kelly Guten-Shoes and Drew Smolder 'n' Such to our Vicey vault for some truly Teddy O'Bong-type behavior...
But before we get to the ganja goodness, let's set the scene for this trio and their night out on the town. See, Buella, Kelly and Drew work extra hard to maintain their fame. Trust, it's a full-time gig aside from their full-time jobs as, you know, actors.
So it's only fair that when the trio clocks out from another long day on the 9 to 5 (or whatever hours they happen to be shooting their sometimes-sexy scenes), they get a little R and R.
And when they relax, they always bring along the rest of the folks they work with. Thoughtful, don't you think? So refreshing to see a cast (and crew, no less) full of folks who actually like each other—whether Vice-induced or not.
On this particular night, BB, KGS and DS2 took the gang out to celebrate one of their fave directors, and where better to create some mildly wild memories than a strip club? Dudes and ladies, alike, packed the place to peep some babes grinding on the pole and flashing their hoo-has.
And when that director—who, no doubt, has just as much reason to need some dubious downtime as his star threesome—innocently asked the cast if anyone might happen to have a little bit of weed, the answer was a resounding hell yes!
Buella, Kelly and Drew even had pipes and other paraphernalia on ‘em—because there's nothing like kickin' back with some g-string types and some not-quite-legal smokes...not when you're young and hot, that is, which they totally are.
See, we're not exactly surprised by this kind of behavior from Kell and Drew, totally chill if you know what we mean, but Buella, on the other hand, can be a downright bitch. Tightass, too.
With all that pot puffin', you'd think her nasty ‘tude would improve, but no. Jeez!

And It Ain't: The Office, Gossip Girl, 30 Rock
* Top suspects: The cast of Vampire Diaries

*Proven by timeline of when Ian Somerhalder was and was not a Blind Vice: The cast of Vampire Diaries.

(one of the males is definitely Ian Somerhalder.  See comments section for reader Spie's proof of this timeline.)

Also included in this BV: Nina Dobrev, Paul Wesley

NY Post-Just Asking 8/5/10

Which network executive was fired for overusing his casting couch? The horny TV honcho was demanding oral sex in exchange for roles on his shows and had a fling with an actress known for her accessibility . . . Which popular Manhattan restaurant had a problem when a rat scurried out of the kitchen across the dining room floor and over a woman's foot? The lady shrieked and ran out, while the eatery went silent as other customers sat in disbelief.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Bonus Blind Vice: The Sad Tale of Strippa Rip-Ya

New from Ted today -

Jennifer Lopez~ Jennifer Lopez Poster~ Rare Poster!!~ Approx 24" x 35"Bonus Blind Vice: The Sad Tale of Strippa Rip-Ya

It's a horrible, unforgivable crime when a man hits a woman. But a tragedy that's perhaps even harder to swallow is why a woman sticks around after she's used like a punching bag. That's the horrific scene Strippa Rip-Ya—a woman who usually tells the dudes right where to get off—is now finding herself in.
Makes some amount of sense, sadly, because something's keeping that woman from being the ol' reliable show-stopper that once made her a controversial household word. Rip-Ya just doesn't shock and entertain quite as electrically as she used to.
And another problem is...
Strippa's friends are too afraid to tell her she should ditch her no-good man, pronto! They think she won't like hearing it (and also won't like finding out how many of her amigas are hip to the crap that's going down).
Jeez! We say go ahead and risk the fact that Strippa just may not like receiving that message, tough! Chance the damn friendship to save her soul (and possible life), we say. We also suggest Ms. R-Y heed this advice right around the same time she calls the cops.
But so far, Strippa's told the couple of friends she's discussed her domestic abuse with that it's "not that bad." And that he just "pushes me around once in awhile."
Two things: Strippa's pals suspect she is covering up, greatly, for how much abuse the talented performer really is having to endure. And they think it will only get worse.
They are correct. Get help now, Strippa. Please, we beg of you.

And It Ain't: Diane Lane, Beyoncé, Brooke Mueller

As of 3/3/12:
Eliminated for Strippa: Diane Lane, Beyonce, Brooke Mueller, Kelly Ripa, Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears, Lea Michele, Lady Gaga, Oprah Winfrey, Dianna Agron, Celine Dion, Demi Moore, Mariah Carey, Gwen Stefani, Miranda Lambert, Brooke Burke, Megan Fox, Kendra Wilkinson, Natalie Portman, Heidi Klum.
Eliminated for Casear: Matthew Broderick, Mark Consuelos, Josh Kelley

8/13 - Ted says that SRY's husband is a celebrity, but does NOT have a BV nickname.
8/18 - Ted has given the husband a nickname - Caesar Anchovy-Arse.
12/3 - Ted says that SRY is a pop diva.
3/8 - Ted says that CAA is the father of SRY's children.

Please use the label below for a link to our posts on the other Strippa and Caesar BVs.

Top suspects: Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony