Lainey - Warning signs

I know, we missed this from a week ago.  There has been a lot going on!  Here is Lainey's riddle from April 15 -

Warning signs

They hooked up real fast. And everything has been at top speed ever since. From initial attraction to exclusivity to super, super serious, they’ve been inseparable, and she’s totally in love and he’s definitely into her too but he’s also really, really into partying. They were both recently at a private event. Everyone was happy, everyone was celebrating, and then he starts making out with another guy. He was also totally f-cked up when it happened. He gets f-cked up a lot. It’s definitely a problem – one that he won’t acknowledge and that she doesn’t want to see because she’s too blissed out. Eventually though it’ll catch up with him and them. For years there have been warning signs with this guy. And it’s affected all of his past relationships. She can’t seem to avoid the dark ones.

Top suspects: Katy Perry and Orlando Bloom

Blind Vice: Loveless Topher Lusts Away the Hours!

New from Ted yesterday, January 13 -

Blind Vice: Loveless Topher Lusts Away the Hours!


Isn't it funny when somebody like Strawberry Snort 'Em appears to have it all: Devoted and cute BF? Check. Cool digs? Beyond-average talent? Check. Back-stabbing besties? Check! But when the love affair busts up, Strawberry stops eating and starts snorting even more, so sad!
But, this Vice isn't about Strawberry, it's about a dude who never, ever wants to be in Strawberry's lovelorn position: Topher Hairy-Tuchus.
And even though Topher's determined to not get caught in love again (he's had a couple of bad breakups), he's not at all averse to getting caught in lust:
As we first told you,Topher's into the anonymous sex thing. And whereas we used to think it was just because Mr. Hairy-Tuchus, like many men in Hollywood, is just a plain ol' closeted actor, well, that's not the only reason he likes to get it on with other guys on the down low.
"He's just done with love, that's all. It's not so much his career, which is what everyone thinks," says a pal who knows Topher both personally, and professionally.
Whoa. So Topher's not so designing in the love department as much as we first thought? Amazing!
Because Topher sure has been giving us all a run for his red-carpet money lately with various sexy ladies by his side—and then some.
"No, no, no," added our Topher source. "He's just horny. And permanently non-committed. It's really that simple. The chicks are a cover for his [sex], not so much his career, get it?"
Do we ever. And here we thought Hairy-Tuchus was some kind of grand, scheming Toothy Tile, who knew!
Just remember, Toph, play safe!
And It Ain't: Ashton Kutcher, Jamie Foxx, Ryan Gosling

Please refer to the link below for our posts on the previous Topher Hairy Tuchus BVs, including a full list of who has been eliminated.

(also see the post on the Strawberry SnortEm BV)

Bonus Blind: Marrying Man Screwing Around Already!

New from Ted today -

Bonus Blind: Marrying Man Screwing Around Already!

Men are dawgs, period, plain and simple. It's a familiar refrain heard ‘round the Awful Truth, so get used to it.

Take Altar-Ego Salami, for example. He's an arguably handsome man of some fame (and talent) who fairly recently got married—or engaged, we're not saying, sorry! But let's put it this way: The announcement of said fact was splashed heartily across many a celeb site.

You know how we goss types are, right? We just get wet in the keyboard whenever something like that goes down. Only thing that gets us more excited is when all that domestic lovey stuff goes wrong, right?

Oh, yeah!

And Altar-Ego is already cheating right and friggin' left on his unsuspecting honey, which is just colossally unbelievable, if you ask us, because Salami is being pretty sloppy about his horning around. He's doing it in very visible, highly desirable hotels. You know, places where lotsa celebs go. And who else goes to places like that?

People who love to talk about people who go to places like that! In other words, it's hardly been a secret that AES has been going in and out of his suites more than his lady companions. He's not being discreet about it. Or quiet.

And the stupid girl who's marrying (or just married) Mr. S thinks she's met the lover of her life. Well, maybe she has, but she's also met the lover of many other babes' lives.

Good thing the arrogant (stupid) prick didn't plan for a prenup—this way, his put-upon woman can sue the tight pants off him later on!

It Ain't: Nick Lachey, David Annable, Nick Cannon

Update Dec 23 - Ted has also eliminated Paul Wesley, Michael C. Hall

Current top suspect: Russell Brand
Other guesses: Eric Johnson, Brian Austin Green, Pete Wentz, Eddie Cibrian

Blind Vice: Keep Your Friends Close, Druggies Closer!

New from Ted today -

Blind Vice: Keep Your Friends Close, Druggies Closer!

We know we promised we wouldn't talk about Morgan Mayhem anymore—until she cleans up her act, that is, which she so totally is not doing—so we apologize for bringing the dreaded M2 back into the mix. Had to.

The good news? This Blind Vice isn't entirely about nasty old Morgs, it's more about the young Hollywood bestie that's getting the Mayhem 101 in "How to Be Bad."

Meet Strawberry Snort'Em, a rising diva known for her mildly wild ways, who's picked up one of M.M.'s nastier habits…
Coke, a Mayhem fave (tho she'd tell you otherwise, obviously).
You wouldn't know it, but S.S. and M2 are quite close—as in share-a-gay-BFF close, the ultimate bond in H'wood. Thing is, Strawberry knows Morgan's rep and wouldn't be caught anywhere near her.
Even on Twitter, where Morgs desperately tries to chat our newest B.V. vixen up but never gets as much as a pity @reply.
But when Strawberry doesn't think she'll be caught, she's got absolutely no problem getting Morgan-level wild! And for a chick who's so friggin' concerned about what people think of her, S.S. isn't so discreet about her bathroom behaviors.
Maybe she figured it was an unspoken code of T-town? "What goes on in the bathroom, stays in the bathroom…"
Well, a few someones are blabbing.
Fellow clubbers on this specific night were too pleased to spot S.S. and M2 snorting away in the trendy L.A. hot spot's posh bathrooms.
And while Morgan went on to much more tabloid-talked-about antics that night (as she always does), Strawberry avoided the press and instead pissed off the other partyers with her coked-up craziness.
Strawberry was completely out of control, dish our club sources, telling us S2 was even climbing on statues within the club. S2's got a name that carries clout in Hollyweird, so security obviously didn't step in to stop her, even though the other club-hoppers were complaining.
Hey, this is Hollywood, people, if you don't like the way the starlets play, get out of the damn clubs, right?
With Morgan as a role model, we're terrified of what may become of sweet Strawberry Snort'Em. Cross your fingers, folks, because we'd hate to see S2's career—and personal life (what would her dude think?)—go down the drain like Morgan's.

It Ain't: Hayden Panettiere, Miley Cyrus, Ashely Greene

We know that Morgan Mayhem = Lindsay Lohan.  See our labels on the right for more Morgan Mayhem posts.

* For Strawberry Snort'Em:
Update 4/20/12 - Ted has eliminated Hayden Panettiere, Miley Cyrus, Ashley Greene, Kirstin Dunst, Lisa Marie Presley, Amanda Bynes. 

Current top suspect: Katy Perry