Another Lainey reveal! - Diddy

Wow, Lainey is giving us Thanksgiving treats. Another semi-reveal today about Diddy ... referencing "Star Treatment" from September.

Here is what Lainey said today:

You are a douche
This is Diddy in a new ad for his new fragrance I Am King that will be plastered in Times Square.
I Am King?
No! You Are Douche. You Are SUCK.
Oh, and it gets worse. Much worse.
When describing the ad, Diddy offered these enlightening words:
"When you see Barack Obama, you see a strong, elegant black man and when people see my ad, it's almost like that's the trend.”
Diddy = Barack Obama?
Sit the f-ck DOWN B List!
Barack Obama wouldn’t tell people not to make eye contact. Barack Obama wouldn’t tell hotel staff to kowtow in his presence and be honoured to breathe his air. Barack Obama wouldn’t make a 100 people wait during what was promised to be a live interactive interview and cancel at the last minute for no reason.
But Diddy would. And Diddy did.
And who are the f-cking idiots spending money on this sh-t?

Diddy reveal!

Lainey-Star Treatment

Star Treatment
How does he roll? Private plane on someone else’s dime with specific requests about the type of aircraft…like it’s not enough to bypass commercial flying, you need to fly in a particular model. But that’s just the beginning. He can only travel in matching (like MATCHING!) SUVs with police escort. Three of them. One left empty. And then a sedan. Why the sedan? Because his lower level staff are not allowed to ride in SUVs. They are beneath SUVs. His staff must also stay in a hotel separate from his.Then there’s eye contact. No eye contact under any circumstances. If his driver happens to have to idle for more than 15 seconds with him in the car – say they’re packing up gear, or waiting for a delivery – the driver must exit the vehicle until the fleet is ready to move. Speaking to him of course is out of the question. Speaking in his vicinity is even worse. The only voice he wants to hear is his own. You can talk…but only when he gives you permission. There’s actually a hand signal for that. It comes from his manager. Hotel staff learn this lesson quickly. Imagine asking someone if he wants fresh towels and have him stare back at you, behind sunglasses, not answering, the silence filling up the room like a flood, how small that person must feel, that person who works and busts her ass for minimum wage, not even to be acknowledged, to feel the message from a millionaire that she is not worth engaging? Not even a nod? If he walks past you in the hall, you must turn your back. If you don’t turn your back he’ll stop walking. His team will stand in a wall around him for fear that you might breathe on him. Worse still, they will harass you. They will intimidate you. They will treat you like a criminal and report you to make sure you are punished.All of this and more, communicated without shame, without embarrassment, executed as though it’s the most natural way to behave … these are His Rules.
Posted on Thursday, September 18, 2008 at 9:03 AM

Update Sept 24: Lainey has eliminated Prince, Justin Timberlake, Tom Cruise, Mike Myers, Snoop Dogg.

** Update Oct 29 - Lainey has basically outed this to be Diddy... (P-Diddy.. or Puff Daddy, or Puffy, AKA Sean Combs).
* And again revealed here on Nov 26!!!