Bonus Blind Vice: The Sad Tale of Strippa Rip-Ya
It's a horrible, unforgivable crime when a man hits a woman. But a tragedy that's perhaps even harder to swallow is why a woman sticks around after she's used like a punching bag. That's the horrific scene Strippa Rip-Ya—a woman who usually tells the dudes right where to get off—is now finding herself in.
Makes some amount of sense, sadly, because something's keeping that woman from being the ol' reliable show-stopper that once made her a controversial household word. Rip-Ya just doesn't shock and entertain quite as electrically as she used to.
And another problem is...
Strippa's friends are too afraid to tell her she should ditch her no-good man, pronto! They think she won't like hearing it (and also won't like finding out how many of her amigas are hip to the crap that's going down).
Jeez! We say go ahead and risk the fact that Strippa just may not like receiving that message, tough! Chance the damn friendship to save her soul (and possible life), we say. We also suggest Ms. R-Y heed this advice right around the same time she calls the cops.
But so far, Strippa's told the couple of friends she's discussed her domestic abuse with that it's "not that bad." And that he just "pushes me around once in awhile."
Two things: Strippa's pals suspect she is covering up, greatly, for how much abuse the talented performer really is having to endure. And they think it will only get worse.
They are correct. Get help now, Strippa. Please, we beg of you.
And It Ain't: Diane Lane, Beyoncé, Brooke Mueller
As of 3/3/12:
Eliminated for Strippa: Diane Lane, Beyonce, Brooke Mueller, Kelly Ripa, Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears, Lea Michele, Lady Gaga, Oprah Winfrey, Dianna Agron, Celine Dion, Demi Moore, Mariah Carey, Gwen Stefani, Miranda Lambert, Brooke Burke, Megan Fox, Kendra Wilkinson, Natalie Portman, Heidi Klum.
Eliminated for Casear: Matthew Broderick, Mark Consuelos, Josh Kelley
8/13 - Ted says that SRY's husband is a celebrity, but does NOT have a BV nickname.
8/18 - Ted has given the husband a nickname - Caesar Anchovy-Arse.
12/3 - Ted says that SRY is a pop diva.
3/8 - Ted says that CAA is the father of SRY's children.
Please use the label below for a link to our posts on the other Strippa and Caesar BVs.
Top suspects: Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony