Sunday, November 21, 2010

Vintage BV: Hussy Purr & Drinkel Manslut

Here's another vintage BV couple, from 2006.   [And here's the thing, people.  This is yet ANOTHER one that people thought this was Jess and Nick.  However, we know that they can each have only ONE nickname and not unliminted as people thought a few years ago.  So who do you think this was about???]
Update 11/23/10 - Nick Lachey was said to NOT have a BV yet, so this couple and other BV couples can NOT be them.

One Rattling Blind Vice - March 16, 2006

Oh, Hussy Purr, every day I come a wee bit closer to understanding why you change moods more often than hairstyles. Sometimes, a story unfolds slowly. What we know is Hussy and her onetime perma-man-candy, Drinkel Manslut, may be no longer. And zillions of theories abound, citing everything from HP's unconventional love life to Drink's roving eyes, hands, etc. Alas, while I'm sure neither Hussy nor Drinkel deserves to be canonized anytime soon, I've learned from excellent sources that it was her misbehavior that put them into "get away from me once and for all" land. And to top it off, I'm told Hussy put her man into a hissy overdrive with an announcement that's straight out of Jerry Springer: I'm pregnant. And you ain't the daddy. I'm sure she put it more gently, of course, but whatev. Not that Hussy ever seemed much of a conniver, mind you. Were she not so famous, none of this scandalicious horror would seem so shocking. But Hussy is. And so is the father. So, don't expect to see any pics of her preggers in the tabs anytime soon. 'Cause you won't. Any guesses why? 

And it ain't: Sienna Miller/Jude Law, DJ AM/Nicole Richie, Miss Piggy/Kermit the Frog

Eliminated: Sienna Miller/Jude Law, DJ AM/Nicole Richie, Miss Piggy/Kermit the Frog, Cameron Diaz/Justin Timberlake, Lindsay Lohan/Wilmer Valderrama, Paris Hilton/Stavros Niarchos

Top suspects: Carmen Electra/Dave Navarro, Denise Richards/Charlie Sheen


blurry vice said...

Jessica Simpson Nick Lachey

"Bulging Briefs!
Rumors schmumors. Let's see. What's floatin' around town. Britney preggers again? Prolly. More on that tomorrow. Can't wait, huh? But how 'bout that Jessica Simpson preggers? Now that one's infinitely more plot thickening, as it would explain (a) why Nick Lachey has been awfully gal-friendly as of late, total recovery hookups in every sense o' the word, I'm sure, and ( cool.gif why Nick's good bud Mr. Matt Leinert was steallar, if not superstellar in the UT-USC game.

My Desk Austin insisted to moi that Matty wasn't up to par because he had been babysitting Nick's shattered ego the night before. This male brewery-bonding occurred immediately after N.L. discovered his ex is reportedly not missing him in the least, has moved on in a big way, said buds superclose to all good-lookin' parties.

Desk Austin is adamant about the dish reported above. Keep in mind, D.A. has never been wrong before--they told me about Jen hooking up with Brad down there, way back when, not to mention certain exquisitely scrumptious bongo-in-the-night deets.

Ah, well."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is the One Rattling Blind Vice about Justin Timberlake and Cameron Diaz? Please say yes!

Dear Beggar:
I can't! Because they would sue me! And because Cameron's not the gal who found herself preggers and threw it in the face of her ex! Bummer! Think, uh, a tad more horizontal and less vertical in the chica department."

"Dear Ted:
Is this last week's One Rattling Blind Vice about Paris Hilton and Stavros Niarchos? It has to be them. I guess life's not that simple for Paris...or maybe it is!

Dear Heiress Huncher:
Hate to burst your detective bubble, but Paris and Stavros it ain't (although they do seem so over). But you're on the right follicle track, fer sure."

"Dear Ted:
Are Hussy Purr and Drinkel Manslut from One Rattling Blind Vice Lindsay Lohan and Wilmer Valderrama? I'm heavy with anticipation.
New York City

Dear Weighed Wonderer:
Too teeny, too cutesy, babe. Not even really that close of a guess. Think far more elegantly bubblicious, and you just may see the dazzling light."

Unknown said...

random but maybe this is heath ledger and michelle williams? according to the BV list, they were both had been subjects before. and heath was in a movie in 2006 called candy so the perma-man-candy thing made me think of it. not sure though because the list said his BV had to do with drugs so IDK

Fish said...

I think this is definately Jessica Simpson. This was around the time that she was filming Employee Of The Month with Dane Cook in New Mexico. There was a March 8 picture (one week before this blind) of her in which she had a fake pregnant belly and engagement ring on.

Also that summer she and Cook continued to deny they were a couple.

PS - Blurry Vice - love your details and deductions.

Unknown said...

Imagine what the public perception of Jessica Simpson is if for every Blind Vice, she is a prime suspect? She's the top guess for at least four Items.

blurry vice said...

Hmm... Michelle Williams, maybe.

I put the jessica and nick labels on this post and the others people think is her, just to have all of the many contenders for jessica lumped together when you click on her label. None are confirmed at all.

Unknown said...

Oh, Blurry, I understand that, but I'm just saying inevitably someone suggests JS for a Vice. In other news, Nick Lachey has never been a Vice?!

hw said...

I saw that about Nick today too!! That means whatever vice Jessica is it doesn't name him!

That said, I think the Michelle Williams guess would be a good one, except Matilda looks A LOT like Heath Ledger.......

Unknown said...

I still think that Jessica`s vice was just her being John Mayer`s toilet and aborting his baby. Don`t know if I`m remembering this correctly but I seem to recall Ted saying that Jess was not the main vicer but a sideliner. With Lachey not being a vice subject it makes me think this all the more. Does anyone remember Ted saying this or am I crazy?

The Spie said...

If Ted says that someone's been a BV, it usually means they've been given a BV name. If it's an unnamed supporting player, he'll get cagey and start putting heavy equivocations in there, like he did for Jackson Rathbone. Ted usually signifies the difference between being a named supporting player and an unnamed one, explicitly mentioning that someone is a BV but doesn't have a BV of their own (viz. Taylor Swift back in March).

Ted said that Jess is a BV. To me, that means she has a BV name. The unnamed supporting blonde ditz in the Super Duper Cooper BV is Simpson, no doubt, but it isn't her Vice. I just don't know if that means that Simpson's BV post-dates January 2008, or if Ted was hiding her status in order to make Super Duper Cooper less obvious.

Heck, right now, I'm just happy that he said Lachey wasn't a BV. That cuts down on the number of Simpson BV possibilities tremendously.

Rita, Montreal said...

I don't know if this is Jessica, Ted talks about hair styles and mood swings. Jessica had always had one.

this one got me thinking though about Pink. In 2006, she separated from her husband, alleging that he has cheated on him. Carey however, never said one bad think about her. After the separation, and around the time of this vice, he was filming that horrible celebrity reality show. During one of the episodes, he refused to trash his ex, but stated though quite firmly that they are done and he wishes her the best.

Brittany said...

Pink doesn't fit this timeline. She just got married like a month before this BV.

Whoever this is, the woman is thicker and shorter than Cameron D. and is blond from the clues. And also no one who was pregnant at the time or shortly after this was posted. Ted alludes that she had the baby aborted.

My guess is Heather Locklear and Richie Sambora.

Elle said...

As of 5 /24/10 Charlize Theron was not a BV. One down!

blurry vice said...

no on nick 11/22
"Dear Ted:
Let's talk happy engaged couples. Have either Vanessa Minnillo or Nick Lachey ever been a B.V.? And do you think they will make it to the altar, beyond and

produce some dimpled offspring?

Dear Newlyweds, Round 2:
No Vices here—both are way too boring for that. But yes, I think they'll definitely swap I do's; they've only been dating forever. The real question is who

will race to the altar first:, him or the former Mrs. Lachey."

Rita, Montreal said...

To Blurry: there is a new BV out today, Nov. 26th, THAT IS SO MUCH JESSICA SIMPSON, I wouldn't call it a blind at all, not even suffers of myopia!

This is going to put a stop to all other Jessica Simpson guesses and lead us in new directions. Can't wait for you to post it!

Happy Thanksgiving to our American Friends.

.debbie. said...

The girls get to posting when they can - they're all busy, lets give them a break...

I like the Locklear/Sambora guess, mostly because I can't think of anyone who fits the Blind better.

blurry vice said...

Rita, it's up. But it's not Jessica. She is already a BV that has not been revealed. At least this week Ted clarified that Nick has never been one. Now we know that they are not a "couple" BV. So Jessica is Impenna Never Trated.

Unknown said...

For the record, I think that "Drinkel Manslut" has got to be the best BV name ever LOL!!!