Monday, May 3, 2010

Bonus Blind Vice: Which Young Star's X-Tra Naughty?

Bonus BV from Ted today...

Bonus Blind Vice: Which Young Star's X-Tra Naughty?

Zac Efron Yearbook 2010You know what a lot of celebs do when they're trapped in the closet? Drugs. And lots of 'em.
A young Toothy Tile had to do line after line just to get through sex with a chick (you know, in an attempt to prove to himself he was straight) and now we're hearing another young homolicious babe is going through similar motions.
Anyone remember cutie Jackie Bouffant?
Jackie, the über-yum young-ish star who has a red-hot career (and bod, just FYI), seems to be dabbling in the hard stuff. But it's not coke.
While out on the town recently Jackie the stud was rolling—and we don't mean in some pimped-out caddy. He was superhigh on ecstasy.
J.B. was hitting a celeb-infested soiree filled with cameras, paparazzi and reporters, so natch that meant his beard was in tow for the photo ops.
And how did Bouffant get through the evening? By popping a few of those teeny colored pills in his mouth so his adorable smile wouldn't fade throughout the event.
Totally sad. Or not?
Thing is, Jackie really does enjoy his gal-pal (they've known each other for a while), but he hardly wants to rip off her stylish clothes off. And yes, Jackie's PR candy is most certainly aware of both of her man's habits—the drugs and dudes. But Missus Bouffant doesn't mind all that much. Jackie certainly is the bigger name out of the pretty pair, so she won't be letting her golden ticket to the tabloids go anywhere.
Ironic, though, how Jack's audience might be more shocked about the whole ecstasy thing than gay thing, which may not stay hidden for too much longer since J.B.'s pals can't stop blabbing about his way fun rolling ways around town.
Wonder which secret will come out—pun intended—first?

And it ain't: Jensen Ackles, Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake

The link to the previous Jackie Bouffant from August '09 is here including a full list of who has been eliminated.  And here is the most recent JB BV from December 2010.

Top suspect: Zac Efron

* Proven by timeline of Ted's dates he was and wasn't a BV: Zac Efron


duffgrl said...

The top guess for the previous JB blind was Zac Efron...going to see if I can find any photos from HWood parties last wkend...

Unknown said...

Could it be a clue that all three of the "it ain'ts" names start with a "J"? Or just coincidence?

duffgrl said...

possibly-looking for clues to someone other than Zac Efron but- he and Vanessa Hudgens were at the US Hot Hollywood party together in LA this past weekend...

Brittany said...

Just to throw this out there, What about Penn Badgley?

MM said...

My first guess was Efron. Esp. since there are already gay rumors about him, but he has a squeaky clean image, so it would shock fans that he's doing E.

Barton Fink said...

You know, a standard idea in these blinds is that a gay person would have such trouble standing in front of cameras with a woman that he would have to take drugs to get through it. I'm sorry, that's stupid. An actor could easily take anyone's hand and smile into a camera. These blinds confuse "being gay" with "being a psychotic who has an intense contempt for women," and the two categories are separate.

blurry vice said...

Barton Fink -
The person who writes the Awful Truth is Ted Casablanca who is gay himself FYI. If you have a problem you can address that to him.

Anyway, I am still on the Zac Efron train for this one. All of the hints from the last one pinted to him and still do for this. He seems to say the same things about Vanessa Hudgens in his column as he does "Missus Bouffant" in this one.

blurry vice said...

I would like to point out that Ted said that Zac Efron was NOT a BV as of 8/27/09, but that he would be soon, the day before the first Jackie Bouffant BV. Then when asked in January 2010 he answered yes that he was a BV and that it was recent. Be my guest to look at the blind vices that occurred during that time frame that he was not eliminated for. This one fits for him.

The Spie said...

Let's look at all of the new male BV identities since August 28th and see if Efron fits any of them:

Maxwell Meat-Mingle: Ted implies heavily that this is a new BV identity for a Revealed BV, plus the physical description doesn't fit Zefron. He's out.

Topher Hairy-Tuchas: No "lauded movies" on Zefron's CV, and Ted said Topher's not part of a franchise, so he's out.

Whore-Hey Hoeman: Doesn't fit at all. He's out.

Schlamm Butt-Wiggle: Ted implies that he's much older than Zac, and considering that the leading candidates for him are Kurt Russell and Tim Robbins...he's out.

Stinky Carrot-Crotch: "Not exactly a lady-killer" is not exactly a description of Zefron. He's out.

Dumbo Pecs: Married to Slink-a-Rella Jiggle. He's out.

Rocky Trailer (gender questionable): Twilight blind. He/she/it is out.

Adam Pounce-Prick: Ted's hinted him to be Gerard Butler, plus the description doesn't fit. He's out.

Quidget Barks-a-little and Harry Fun-Tanked: Both married. They're out.

Nelly Fang: Plays a vampire. He's out.

Parrish Maguire: This is the only other possibility for Efron other than Jackie. Efron was the second-most-popular guess for Parrish after Taylor Lautner. Efron hasn't been AIAed for Parrish. However, Efron doesn't fit the "repeater on a TV show" clue that Ted offered for Parrish, while Lautner does. Not a solid He Isn't, but not the favorite candidate.

So, Efron has to be one of two BV identities, either Jackie Bouffant or Parrish Maguire, and the preponderance of evidence points toward Jackie.

Unknown said...

Zac and Vanessa were just pictured at the LA Family Housing Gala on 4/21. Here is a picture, you can decide if you think he is high!!

This has to be someone with a wholesome image and some kind of tween-oriented fan base. It is not Twilight, and HSM/Disney fits perfectly. That would be why it would be more shocking that he was drugging than gay.

ItsAJ said...

The three "it ain't" names all begin with J, but they all end with an "-in" sound.

How about Kevin Jonas?? Nick and Joe have been ruled out, he hasn't!

ItsAJ said...

...oh no, wait. The first one said he is an Actor. Nevermind me so!

blurry vice said...

Thank you The Spie for going through that list!

Anonymous said...

Well, I think this could be Hayden Christensen. The AIA names all end in "en" sounds as his does, he's Canadian like Bieber. Also, the first blind indicated to me, that JB was somewhat older than Efron.

Lainey said this today about Hayden "He’s that same Efron/Pattinson androgen quality about him, and I guess it’s no accident that he was 8 years ago what they are now.

Time always mutes intensity but for those of who are too young or who can’t remember, for a while there he was the biggest deal ever. Handpicked by George Lucas. The young embodiment of one of the most iconic characters in film history. It never seemed like he was comfortable with all the It."

I think this is Hayden.

Unknown said...

I see your argument for HC, but I can't hop on the train just yet. I don't see tweens putting his poster up on their wall. Is he somewhat iconic? Sure, for Star Wars. But the fan base on that movie is not akin to anything remotely close to a pre/teenage girl. The only thing I can say is that I see he has been on the Disney channel just prior to landing Star Wars, which is something Ted identified as part of his resume in a BB from last year.

In addition, Ted says that a Jonas (forget which) is close but not right. Zac is much closer to a Jonas than Hayden Christensen. If it were HC, how would he be considered multi-talented? Does he sing or dance? Those are both things that we know Zefron does. Just asking!

blurry vice said...

Hayden Christensen was already a BV as of May '09. The first JAckie Bouffant BV was written in August '09.

Unknown said...

Hmm well Zac doesn't seem high in those pics from the Family Housing Gala - check the pupils - dead giveaway if you're munted.

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

although he may not be high in that particular picture, celebs sometimes use color contacts to hide their dialated pupils, so its no longer a dead giveaway

Anonymous said...

@Emilee, someone needs to teach Lilo that trick.

Unknown said...

@anony-2 lol i think lilo needs wayyy more help than some color contacts

Jolene Jolene said...

Barton Fink: In the blind, Ted says "A young Toothy Tile had to do line after line just to get through sex with a chick (you know, in an attempt to prove to himself he was straight)." He did not say he had to do drugs to get through walking the red carpet/public outing with a chick. Toothy was having sex with chicks when he was dating Kiki, who was never a beard. He was trying to prove to himself he was straight or bi, and she knew something was up and caught wind of his liking for boys eventually. So stop bitching, please. Thanks.

Oh, and JB is so Zac E.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You mentioned that Jackie Bouffant has a beard you referred to as Missus Bouffant. As such, I'm assuming that these two have actually walked down the aisle. Thanks for clarifying. Take care!

Dear Jackie's Girl:
You know what they say about assuming, right, darling?"

blurry vice said...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You talk about Vanessa being possessive of Zac. Why does he stay? Also, if it seems like everyone is talking about Nicole Kidman's weird forehead, why isn't she doing something about that mask-y face? Also giving you a shout-out from my kitty, Bella!

Dear Why Why Why:
Well Zac and Vanessa are totally in love, haven't you heard? Also, they look mucho cute together and get a lot of press, so that doesn't hurt, does it? As for Nic and her frozen forehead, she thinks it looks fabulous! It's like rock-hard youth."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Sadly, no pets here...too many allergies. Sad face. a guilty fan of Zefron and Vanessa, have the two ever been a BV? She had all that nudity stuff...we're talking some real BVs.

Dear Shocker:
Actually, she has...not. But Zac sure has!"

Anonymous said...

i'm new to this whole BV game, but is ZE supposed to be toothy tile or jackie bouffant.

he's a top suspect for both. how does that work LOL

personally, i'm not seeing it.

mariana said...

I'm kind of new to this BV thing, but I thought I'd try to give my two cents. I think Zac is really plausible but I'm not sure it's him because:

1. When answering the question about Disney, Ted said something to the effect of, it's not the obvious choice/answer? Zac would definitely be the "obvious answer."

2. On a past bitch-back, Ted said JB's beard had nothing really going for career wise or something to that effect. Vanessa has two movies coming out... doesn't exactly fit.

3. The fauxmancing other babeS around town. Allegedly, Zac and Vanessa have been dating since HSM 1 was filmed, during said time, Zac was still somewhat anonymous. It possible that they made up the "dating since the first movie" thing as a cover up, but it seems unlikely as they would have had to have EVERYONE involved lie for them as well (Kenny, costars, execs, etc.)

4. HSM1 was shot when Zac was 17. Gay semi-serious relationship at that age seems odd... quite possible but doesn't strike me as true. Also, didn't he date that girl from Summerland? The one who played Amber? So if she counted as BabeS, then that means his gay semi-serious relationship would have to have been before 16? Seems a little young/early. Based on this, I think JB is someone older. Possibly 27 and up or something? Ted calls JB "young-ish" and Zac at 22=young, in my opinon.

5. Finally, Frank Dangerfield... equally recognizeable and gorgeous... I don't think Jesse McCartney because Jesse was more famous than Zac.. Corbin Bleu could be possible but I find it a stretch. Corbin's attractive but I wouldn't go as far as equally attractive. Bubba Lewis, Zac's longtime friend?? But he was never really famous or recognizable.

I think Ted wants us to think it's Zac because it causes more controversy and interest, and he fits the bill extremely well... but there are some things that don't match up completely for me.

Has anyone looked in to Justin Bartha? His name goes along with the other elminations, is dating Ashley Olseon, has the same initials as Jackie Bouffant, etc. He doesn't exactly fit either, but the same intials are intriguing.

I mean Justin is good looking, has rising fame from national treasure (which was disney). Not sure about the multitalented... maybe that he is an action star and a comedy star? Hasn't really had to prove himself, got more popular from the Hangover... he does lack the big teenage girl fanbase though. But hasn't Ted been known to exaggerate? That's what I read somewhere else...

Like I said I'm new to this, so... I could be wrong on both counts.

mariana said...

Oh and one last thing. The "soiree" doesn't fit for me either.

I don't think a "soiree" is really something like the housing gala, because that was a charity event.

Did anyone look into couples at the MET Gala? Wasn't this around that time? the MET Gala would fit the "soiree" thing perfectly.

Anonymous said...

@The Real Sherlock Jr

love your logic, and totally agree. also, if Zac and Vanessa were in fact faking it, or covering something, then why do we see them behaving like any other "normal couple." this can be traced all the way back to HSM1, and there are numerous candids of them together to back this up. they kept the relationship under the radar, and continued to try and deny they were a couple even after pics of them vacationing in hawaii in 2007 surfaced.

a fake relationship would mean plenty of "couple time" in front of the camera, hitting every red carpet and soiree possible. instead we hear more about them doing ordinary, everyday things, ie, hanging out with friends, running errands together, shopping together, going to the movies together, vacationing together, and visiting with each other's families.....together, get where i'm going with this? LOL

that "proves" more to me than any innuendo thrown about by bloggers who seem to wish he were gay.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Can you give us a clue to which B.V. Zac Efron has been?

Dear Clued In:
He's been a repeat offender, definitely couldn't fit all his baggage into one B.V."

blurry vice said...

bettybaby -

No, Zac EFron is NOT Toothy Tile.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Did you see Zac Efron's reaction when the Kiss Cam on MTV Movie Award zoomed in on him and Nessa? He was so reluctant to kiss her. His own girlfriend! The other couples who got the Kiss Cam didn't seem to have the same problem (even Russell Brand and Jonah Hill!). Nessa puckered her lips waiting for Zac to kiss her back, but he was just "bumping" his lips against her. It was not even a peck. What do you think about this?

Dear Friggin' Uncomfortable:
What are you talking about, Alice? Didn't you see the passion! The desire! OK, totally agree the moment was holy-crap awkward, which might be one of the reasons Zac was so quick to clam up. No one wants to be first on the Kiss Cam, everyone knows that."

The Spie said...

If you look above, I figured out through logic that Efron's BV had to be either Jackie Bouffant or Parrish Maguire. Ted's statement that Vanessa has never been a BV has clinched it for Jackie. If Efron were Parrish, then Hudgens would have had to have been Priscilla Desert, and, obviously, she's not. I don't think there's any argument anymore about this one, folks.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I think I have finally figured out a Blind Vice! Jackie Bouffant is Alexander Skarsgård, at Coachella, with his, um, girlfriend, Kate Bosworth.

Dear Loves People:
Nice try, but Alex isn't dreamy Jackie. Jackie has been a bigger name for a lot longer than Skars has."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Do you have any dirt on Vanessa Hudgens, and will you be so kind as to spill it?

Dear Hudge School Musical:
If anyone actually buys the innocent act that V-doll has been performing for years, I'll eat my computer. It's harder to prove that she's a good girl, matter o' fact."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Does Jackie Bouffant attend the same notoriously gay bashes that other Blind Vice stars Parrish Maguire and Crescent Kumquat attend?

Dear Peeping Pixie:
He has. But not at the same time."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has Vanessa Hudgens done something to you? I get she made a big mistake with the pics but I don't get the hate, you insinuate she's a bad girl, yet she doesn't have a Blind Vice. She really doesn't party in public and what she does behind closed doors is her business. I've met her and she was so kind and sweet.

Dear Luv For Hudgens:
No personal vendetta against the gal, I've met her and she's quite sweet, just not the squeaky clean gal she'd like you to believe—not by a long shot. And just because she doesn't have her own Vice doesn't mean she hasn't made a guest cameo in one."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I have to wonder. How is Jackie Bouffant able to keep certain feelings of his under-wraps, if he has a beard? Or is he following in Crescent Kumquat's footsteps?

Dear Up For The Challenge:
Jackie is an actor, after all. And a good one! But who says he's keeping anything under wraps? His beard knows the game and is plenty willing to play it to get her smiling mug plastered on magazine covers."

chingchungchang said...

for me, it seems a little too good to be true if it is Zac. don't you think Ted could have listed all the things so everyone thinks it is Zac, even though it's not? Ted is pretty smart, and I would think he wouldn't make a vice so obvious, unless he wanted to out them like Lea Michele...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
So what's the deal with Jackie Bouffant's beard? I get wanting to remain relevant and that magazine covers are few and far between for most actresses, but come on, a girl's gotta eat! Does she have a little something on the side, or is Jackie giving her just enough to keep her happy. Where do beards go when they get "hungry"?

Dear Cravings:
Babe, don't you think a lifetime of fame is worth a little dry spell in a gal's sex life? At least, that's what Jackie's bearding babe believes. But don't worry about her libido—like most beards, her BF doesn't care whether she dabbles with other dudes so long as she keeps it way, way on the DL."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I've been having very vivid and real dreams about Jackie Bouffant, or at least who I believe Jackie to be (hot ones too!). What has he been up to lately? Is he still taking ecstasy? I hope he doesn't mess up his career as he seems like a talented and decent guy.

Dear X Marks the Spot:
Jackie isn't exactly an addict; he just likes to loosen up from time to time. And I guess the dude doesn't think he can do it without going to the X-treme. Don't worry, though, he's not the type to ever mess up his perfect career with a nasty drug scandal. He's far more about the day job these days."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Who do you think is the cuter couple, Robsten or Zanessa? Also who do you think will last longer? I'll bet on Zanessa.

Dear Watch Your Back:
You're about to unearth the fury of a horde of Twi-hards with virtual pitchforks. Better go and hide—and make room for me, since I might, might, be able to be talked into making bets on Zac and Vanessa. Even though Robsten are so much hotter, and hotter for, each other."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
If you were to reveal every B.V., which one would have people most surprised? Which one would be the most devastating for their career? And which one would have people shrugging their shoulders in indifference?

Dear Grand Viceroy:
Way to put me on the spot there, champ. Your first two questions garner one answer: the closets! Whether it's Crescent Kumquat, Jackie Bouffant, Nevis Divine or even age-old Toothy Tile, it's always the closet cases that shock. But gosh, I wish they would realize their careers wouldn't be devastated, only different—and maybe for the better. It's a new age. Fake à la Ferocity would, without a doubt, suffer the most career damage if her personal activities were known, and if Morgan Mayhem‘s identity were revealed, I think people might actually yawn."

blurry vice said...

:Dear Ted:
In a recent Bitch-Back, you said that Robsten would break up before Zanessa. Could you give us, in your opinion, why you think that is more likely and maybe who or what would break them up? By the way, I haven't adopted an animal, but I did take in a pregnant stray that gave me four fuzzy kittens, and I also feed all the neighborhood stray cats and dogs. That's like having 20 kids to feed!

Dear Purr-fect:
Kisses to all your kitties, Jess. As for Zanessa, call me crazy, but I could actually see them tying the knot. Can't you?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is it just me or is Zac Efron suddenly talking a little more about his relationship with Vanessa Hudgens? He's talked about her in almost every interview he's done for the past two weeks. I mean, it's still nothing compared to the vast majority of Hollywood couples, but he seems to be finally acknowledging that Vanessa exists. It seems quite convenient, seeing as he has a new movie coming out. So, is it all for publicity, or is he more in love than ever? And what do you make of Zac's recent trip to a strip club?

Dear Head in the St. Clouds:
Better question: is it just me or has Zac Efron been looking über-delicious lately? But I guess I'll answer your questions too. That's the way Zanessa work—keep it super low-key until there's a new project to pimp. As for the strip club ordeal, who cares? The dude is definitely of age and no sordid stories came from his little peepshow pit stop, so if he wants to blow his dough on a night of boozing and boobs, I say go for it."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I try to understand you, but I can't! You always said, "I believe in Robsten," and now you are saying they'll break up? Do you believe more in Zanessa than Robsten? Seriously? Zanessa seems more PR (sorry all fans) but Robsten? They seem be very private people. Why do you think they'll break up? Please can you explain to us? Everyone is asking why you change your mind.

Dear Calm Down:
Two things, love: First, I never said I thought that Robsten would break up (at least imminently). I just said that, between the two couples at this moment in their relayshes, Zanessa seems more plausible in the long run, but who the hell knows? Secondly, I never changed my mind, sorry."

blurry vice said...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You stated that Zanessa seems more plausible than Robsten, and when I read that my heart broke. I was a Robsten believer from the start when people were skeptic and I am pulling for them still today. Please tell me your reasons behind Zanessa being more "plausible" than Robsten.

Dear A to Z...anessa:
Suffice it to say there's moolah at work, not just heart strings."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
With all due respect, do you expect us to believe that for the last five years Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens have signed a contract to pretend to be lovers just so the public wouldn't suspect his sexual orientation? First, they both deserve Oscars, have you seen the way they look at each other when they're alone in candid? Next, he could date a different girl everyday to keep up the ruse. Finally, I for not one second think that Zac Efron is gay, he is way too much of a flirt. He's way too smart to stay with someone because of a contract and your basically calling for being paid to be a beard. Unless you have absolute proof I don't think you should insinuate things that can destroy these young, nice, actors' careers. Thank you.
—A Fan

Dear Assuming:
These two like each other; I never said otherwise. And I certainly never mentioned a "contract"—how very Tom-and-Nicole conspiracy theory of you! Plus, I don't think little-old me is going to hurt either of their red-hot careers. Well, Zac's anyway."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Are Zac Efron and Ashley Tisdale friends anymore? It's been months, and they haven't been seen together. I would love for them to date.

Dear Zashley?
Well, since Zac and Vanessa are still doing what they do best and don't have High School Musical 10 to promote, penciling in Ash isn't high on their list of priorities. But don't think there's bad blood between the former costars either."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I've been wondering, what have Jackie Bouffant and his beard been up to lately? Is she ready to set him free and find a real man?

Dear Bouff-Be-Gone:
Please, Miss Bouffant will definitely not be the one to end this relaysh. Not in a million, billion years, Bonn. Half the reason this babe is even snapped in pap pictures is because of her arm candy BF."

Unknown said...

Every clue points to Zac. It's almost too easy...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You haven't talked about Jackie Bouffant in a while. I've always wondered, is he faithful to his beard, or does he go out and sow wild oats?

Dear Stepping Out:
He's as faithful to his beard as any closeted Hollywood stud. He makes sure he's never accused of sneaking around with another lady as to make things appear to be all happy on the home front (which of course benefits them both). "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
What's going on with Jackie Bouffant at the moment? Is he any closer to getting rid of his beard and coming out?

Dear Just Jackie:
A whole lot of nothing, actually. Now that you mention it, where the heck has Mr. Bouff been lately? Off getting smarter, clearly."

blurry vice said...

Zac Efron - printed togehter 10/18:

"Dear Ted:
I love Zac Efron and I would like to know has he ever been involved in anything that would really ruin his squeaky clean image?

Dear Get Real:
We all have, Zac included.

Dear Ted:
I find your column quite sad in a way. All the lies that are going on in Hollywood are ridiculous. Why can't they all accept everyone how they are. Also, I think I know who Jackie Bouffant is, and if it is who I think it is, it breaks my heart. I love him so much. Can you give us any more clues about him.

Dear Stop Making Gay Sad:
"Break your heart" ‘cause a dude likes the guys? Why is this such a bad thing, so sick of this gay = tragedy mentality!"

"Dear Ted:
I was wondering does Jackie Bouffant ever hook up with his beard, and what about her? Does she ever look elsewhere?

Dear Curious:
Sure, Jackie will hook up with her. But he most definitely looks elsewhere—guys and girls in fact!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I insist you dish on three yummy boys who share a lot in common looks-wise. Zac Efron, Chace Crawford and Ian Somerhalder! These boys need to play brothers stat, no? All three are known B.V.ers, so I was wondering if their dirty deeds have any similarities, or are they each in their own respective classes of naughty? Much love to ya, even if you won't spill!

Dear Pretty in Vices:
Sure, they share a lot more in common than just their oh-so-delish looks. Two of ‘em more than the third though. Can you guess which guy is the odd Vice out?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Wanna help a volunteer fanatic overcome the Monday blues? Really? Thanks! Rank the following according to how emotionally close (like BFFs) the following closeted stars are to their respective current beards, from besties to enemies in it for the PR: Toothy Tile, Seymour Plow-Me-More, Harland Fuss and Jackie Bouffant. Sending some hungover kisses your way!

Dear Rhetorical:
Jackie the closest, by far. Seymour a distant second, and Toothy and Harland? Don't even ask!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Your response to my question yesterday got me thinking: Do Jackie Bouffant and his beard have an open banging policy à la Nevis Divine? In other words, is there a hint of romantic affection between them? Or are they just besties?

Dear Not Enough:
Open bang sesh is a sometimes go between Jackie and his gal. But I'd say Nevis enjoys his one-on-one time more."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Jackie Bouffant gay or bi?

Dear Thin Line:
It is tough to distinguish between the two sometimes. Jackie has stepped out on his beard with other girls, but those sloppy makeout sessions seem more for show. I foresee J.B. ending up secretly with a dude à la Toothy Tile, rather than Nevis Divine who will end up with a chick."

Anonymous said...

Ok, I have to admit, this pains me too, that I love ZEfron. My daughter was and is addicted to the HSM movies. I cannot see ZEfron as JB. His chemistry with Vanessa is hot, hot, hot. Espesh in HSM 3. I don't think he is that great of an actor, so I am not sure how he could pull this off. Plus, if he was stepping out on V, wouldn't the tabs be all over it? Maybe I have watched Charlie St. Cloud too many times, but he acts like a flirt, flirt, flirt. Playing devil's advocate I am not sure about the Sterling Knight connection. I admit there was a weird chemistry between them but Sterling is not z-list...and the poor kid seems like he is in love with Demi Lovato.

blurry vice said...

Dear Ted:
You stated that Vanessa Hudgens would totally corrupt Josh Hutcherson. Does this mean V.Hudge is a Blind Vice? Can we get a hint on that one?

Dear V-Man:
She's an also-starring, not a major character in Vice history. However, Vanessa's trying to bounce up to feature player pronto!"