If anyone's been wondering why the very funny Coco Crack-Head, who used to have a most natural figure, has recently become bone-thin, we have a pretty good clue as to why: The bitch is doing blow in public and not even being cool about it! Like, at all. Coco, who genuinely does have a kind of goofy talent on her popular prime-time show, was recently out to dinner with her sister and friends. Over at Oak Fire Pizza in West Hollywood. Everybody was having pizza and beer, but, not our Coco—she was guzzling a martini and generally making a fool of herself while gushing nonsense about her "beautiful" sister. Fellow diners thought the poor babe was just drunk until one of them followed Coco to the restroom. The nosy pizza-eater waited her turn for Coco to come out of the stall, then went into the one Ms. Crack-Head had just exited. Guess what Coco had left all over the toilet-paper dispenser? And, no, it wasn't remains of her dinner, which she'd just brought back up (though that's not a bad guess). Coco had actually left behind the remnants of all the coke she'd just chopped up and snorted! For any one to see! Jeez, is it so much trouble to take a little toilet paper and wipe it up, babe? Or were you just too high to notice? We suspect Ms. Crack-Head wants people to know what a druggie she really is, because—much to her sister's dismay—Coco was showing her table mates (and those nearby) pictures of lines of coke on her I-phone, daring folks to guess what it was. Hmm...drug addicts amuse themselves so well, huh? Jeez, how long is before Coco realizes she just becoming another Lindsay Lohan, already? Or is that what she wants, just for the notoriety? And, for the record, Coco, nobody believes that accident you had awhile back was for the reason you stated. Guess we know now what caused it! And It Ain't: Selena Gomez, Chelsea Handler, Yvonne Strahovski
Update 6/22/12 - Ted has eliminated Selena Gomez, Chelsea Handler, Yvonne Strahovski, Mischa Barton, Jenna Fischer, Amy Poehler, any SNL staple, Whitney Houston, Bijou Phillips, Sarah Hyland, Naya Rivera, Heather Morris, Demi Lovato
Top suspects: January Jones OR AnnaLynne McCord(see comments)
The "exposed" celebrities mentioned in this blog are purely guesses. They are the thoughts and opinions of the authors of this blog in response to reading various gossip columns. Do not take our guesses, or photos posted of our guesses, as fact or as a source of accurate information. We are doing this for entertainment purposes only.
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