Saturday, January 22, 2011

Blind Vice: King Schlong Can't Keep It in His Pants

New from Ted -


Blind Vice: King Schlong Can't Keep It in His Pants



Oh King Schlong! How happy you're about to make many of your groupies all over the world, when they find out that high profile relationship you're in don't mean a thang.
See, King is king for a reason. He's charming, knows how to command a room, and is good looking in that yeah, I know I'm the s--t kind of way.
So, it only makes sense he found an equally yummy counterpart whom he has flaunted all over the world.
Inception (Two-Disc Edition) [Blu-ray]But does she know where her man's penis plays when she's away?
Lots of places, really, but one girl she might be super pissed about her man shagging is a well-known L.A. party chick who has bedded the likes of one Shafterella Shoshtein's boy bitches, Super Duper-Cooper, and the bisexual star who gave Crescent Kumquat herpes.
Don't you just love the one degree of Blind Vice separation in this town?
Anyhoo, party honey was pulling her phone out and showing all kinds of dirty texts that King Schlong was sending her while he was supposedly with his pretty babe.
"She's so stupid," quipped the preening slut about King's main gal. "He cheats on her all the time. But he's good in bed and hot, so I don't feel bad about it."
It's true, King Schlong has his moniker for a reason. He's quite royally equipped.
And it's only a matter of time before that gorgeous babe of his catches him putting his jewels where they don't belong—and calls it off.
Clearly, it's what the eternal bachelor is aiming for.
And It Ain't: Joel Madden, Kanye West, Johnny Depp

Update 3/24/12 - Ted has eliminated Joel Madden, Kanye West, Johnny Depp, Caleb Followhill, Prince William, George Clooney, Darren DeGallo, Jared Leto, Robert Pattinson, 50 Cent, Joe Jonas, Channing Tatum, Mark Wahlberg, P Diddy, Matthew McConaughey, Justin Timberlake, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Bruce Willis, Dwayne Johnson, Jon Hamm, Ryan Gosling, Alexander Skarsgard, Bradley Cooper, Christian Bale, Jason Statham, Kevin Connolly, Brad Pitt, Chris O'Donnell, Matthew McConaughey, Anderson Cooper, James Franco, Ryan Reynolds, Chris Pine, Ashton Kutcher, Tao Ruspoli, Morgan Freeman, Tom Hardy, Aaron Eckhart, Chord Overstreet, Taylor Lautner, Jamie Foxx, Alex Pettyfer, Kellan Lutz, Alec Baldwin, Jonah Hill, Michael Fassbender.

Clues: Not an athlete; has not done voice-over work; has been a side character in a BV before, but never a starring role until now.Was at the 2011 Academy Award ceremony. Think more movies than television.  Does not have kids.  Much younger than Morgan Freeman.

Top suspect -Leonardo DiCaprio (even though he has already been a BV "ages ago" per Ted in 2010. Yes... Ted says KS has been in a BV before, as a side character. He is now saying people can have two names. See our discussion in comments!)

417 comments:

blurry vice said...

Sounds like Leo to me. Although he is already a BV.

Jennifer said...

Clooney

Magistra said...

this is p diddy. the name is a reference to "i am king," which is his fragrance. The AIAs: Joel Madden's real name is COMBS, Kanye is pointing us in a rapper's direction. not sure about johnny depp.

Tara said...

I am going to try the sports angle here. A-Rod is the obvious choice (recently linked to Cam Diaz), Derek Jeter (dating actress Minka Kelly) is known as the "Hit King" of the NY Yankees AND it was speculated that he gave Jessica Alba herpes (ding ding ding!), and then we have LeBron James (aka The King) who it would not be hard to believe can live up to this nickname;) James is rumored to be seeing Ciara. Where is The Spie when you need him?! Did you die, Spie?

Here is a link to the Derek Jeter fiasco:

http://jezebel.com/292440/did-derek-jeter-gave-poor-jessica-alba-herpes

Other parties involved (stay with me now, it is midnight here and I must go to sleep now):

The LA Party Girl could be Scheana Marie Jancan (admitted to tappin' John Mayer & Eddie Cibrian while married). This leads me to decoding the Crescent Kumquat herpes blind to go along with this, naming characters that correspond with this blind.
Bisexual Star=John Mayer (the double mention of SDC AND bisexual star is suspect, and he fits with the CK herps blind as THE bisexual star that gave the publicist the herpes first)
Gay Loving Chick= Taylor Swift aka Priscilla Desert (rumors started in Jan '10 and duet came out in June '10)
Loudmouth Publicist=Lizzie Grubman
Rumored to have hooked up with John Mayer, even if it was documented a few years ago (maybe it was an ongoing occasional affair) Evidence:
http://www.contactmusic.com/new/xmlfeed.nsf/story/mayer-dating-britney.s-former-publicist.

Okay, time for bed. Sorry for the novel, I was on a googling roll. Hope it still makes sense tomorrow.

Katie said...

Wow Tara! You definitely put some thought into that one. I was going through the guesses in the comments section, and they're all over the place. Most already have a BV though, like Leo and Justin Timberlake. Russell Brand is another popular guess, but he's thought to be Altar-Ego Salami.

Groupies makes me think musician...but I can't think of a musician that would be connected to "king." And royally makes me think either British, or maybe part of a famous family?

A couple that came to mind for me were Jared Leto (30 Seconds to Mars, and they had a song "King and Queens"), or maybe Jason Statham, whose dating Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, but then I remembered that she was the top suspect for Bernie.

Kristen said...

I actually heard that the CK herpes story was total bullshit from a different gossip site. Supposedly, someone deliberately gave Ted bad information about Chace Crawford, and I'm pretty sure it was that story. If not that one, the one with the online hookup.

Alejandra said...

Wow! Tara, good job! I am liking your line of thought!

sistah2 said...

need more clues for this one...Ted doesn't say movie star or music, or whatever...usually he'll do that. Probably not movie star, though. Just a gut feeling. Funny that he nott'd Depp- it really sounds like him. Other than him, movie stars dont usually have 'groupies'

Jessica said...

There are definitely professional groupies in the sports world, and I'm really like the Derek Jeter guess...Minka Kelly is gorgeous but kind of generic looking, I get her mixed up with Leighton Meester in almost every picture I see of her. If she wasn't dating DJ her stock would go way down. Not to mention, DJ has been one of the most notorious bachelors for years, is the most famous face (king!) of his sport and has a pretty well known history of being slutty. (Is it terrible that I love the Jessica Alba/herpes story?)

Haley said...

Not sure why, but when I read this I immediately thought of Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough. He has certainly been parading her around and posing for pap pictures all over the world. And I remember him being linked briefly to Jasmine Waltz...who would definitely fit the bill for the slutty party girl. I don't know if he'd be considered "king" or have "groupies" though. Thoughts?

Duskyjewel said...

Maybe The Daily Bulge can help. Yes, a web site dedicated to male celebrity packages exists. Found it while researching on this blind : http://daily-bulge.blogspot.com/.

Megan said...

Isn't Shafterella supposed to be Reese W. and when was Reese ever linked to John Mayer?

jjonefiftypb said...

Hey did anyone think this could be Price William? Sometimes Ted likes to write stories about the people he makes blind vices out of earlier on on the week. He wrote two stories about William last week & one about who should be king, William or Charles. There are several references to royalty jewels & so on. The only confusing part would be what on earth I William doing with a party girl from LA? Sticking with the royalty theme it could also be Prince Albert of Monaco. He is a wh*** & knows a lot of LA folk both in the music industry & otherwise.This could very easily be him. Other guesses A-Rod,Derek Jeter or Enrique Englasis. He has a high profile relationship with Anna Kornicova. Definitely more info is needed.

Cecilia00 said...

Neither Clooney or DiCaprio fits this for me. I was thinking DiCaprio, but now feel that something's off with that guess.Clooney is a great guess, but I don't see Elisabetta being that clueless.

If it's a sports star, I feel they would have to be L.A. based because the blind is focused on L.A people.

What about KINGS Of Leon lead singer Caleb Followill?? He is engaged to model Lily Aldridge...

But would he be considered that hot? Hmmm

Felix said...

First thought was Clooney. "Eternal bachelor" et al.

It's definitely not P Diddy. He's not good looking in the "I know I'm the shit kind of way".

Also, Prince William... really?

And wasn't Prince Albert of Monaco thought to be gay?

cassandra said...

I have nothing to back this up, but I thought about Jon Hamm for this one...

jjonefiftypb said...

Felix given the limited information we have either of the princes is as good of a guess as any other. There have been rumors of Prince Albert of Monaco being gay and I guess he isn't really hot. But Ted does sometimes do what he did last week write about a person and then create a blind so it's not totally out of the relm of possibility. The King article that wrote about about Prince William does make it a possibility..

Tara said...

Thanks guys/gals! I totally nerded out lastnight with that--wow that was dorky but was so into the degrees of separation and linking everyone. BTW, Clooney has already been confirmed as a vice as late as '09 (see list of Ted's BV reveals), and DiCaprio has as well.

Megan, it doesn't say Shafterella slept with King Schlong or John Mayer, it says that the LA party chick King banged had also banged one of Shafterella's bitch boys (Jake, Ryan P, etc).

Also, I think Ted is using the recent Prince William story to focus attention on him, to take our attention away from other possibilities. Its a little too obvious and it is quite debatable as to how handsome he really is.

I know the LA party chick is Los angeles based, but that doesn't mean that whoever it was has to live there. Many celebs are bi-coastal, or travel to NY/LA for work. John is likely in NY regularly and Crescent lives there for work as well. I like Jeter best for King right now. Also heard today Ciara is dating Amari Stoudemire, so the James theory is a no go. I think I will ask Ted something about KS' line of work to attempt to narrow it down.

The Spie said...

Tara: You've got it covered pretty well right now. I don't need to butt in.

This whole BV lies on the identity of the party girl. She's someone who's 1) directly connected to John Mayer, 2) dated someone who also dated Reese Witherspoon, and 3) dated someone who's been linked to Chace Crawford. If this was a celebrity, even a D List one, surely she'd have a BV Name by now. Ted couldn't have resisted doing one. So we have to assume she's either a scenemaker or socialite. If the latter, though, there may have been some media attention given to her.

If we get Party Girl's ID, this puts us one huge step closer to solving this.

jjonefiftypb said...

Then my guess is on A-Rod. Didn't Ted hint a while ago that he plays away. He has a horrible reputation we will see.

Ado said...

Hmm.

JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE + Olivia Munn..?

http://www.gossipcop.com/justin-timberlake-texting-olivia-munn-fling/


What is supposed to be JT's other BV..?

I said...

Justin Timberlake & Olivia Munn. I, too, read about the texting thing very recently. Plus, I had the misfortune of seeing JT up close and personal when he was in Toronto and working out at the same gym I used to belong to (The Yorkville Club).

He DEFINITELY has the "I'm know I'm the s_it" thing going on. I definitely think it's JT & Olivia Munn for the girl. Heard Olivia Munn is a huge party girl hoping to get super famous.

I said...

Plus JB visited JT at the gym and their chemistry is SOO OFF. You know she is clinging on to him and he is just hoping to be rid of her soon. Sad.

Ado said...

Sorry that I put it in the 2nd comment:

Speaks for JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE:

1) King Schlong - he was nicknamed "trousersnake"
2) "groupies" - musician (as Katie pointed out)
3) "while the girlfriend is away" - JT and Jessica Biel openly spend a lot of time separate, like when she climbed Mount Kilimanjaro
4) Link with Shaftarella: Chris Pine (dated Olivia Munn, filmed This means war w/ Reese Witherspoon)

..though I cannot find a link between Olivia Munn and John Mayer (SDC)..

:(

Ado said...

5) groupies all over the world - nsync worl tours..?

6)He flaunted her all over the world - JT and JB in Italy
http://www.laineygossip.com/Justin_Timberlake_and_Jessica_Biel_promoting_their_relationship_in_Italy_with_the_paparazzi.aspx?IsMicro=0

aaaaand:
7) "cathes him putting his jewels where they don't belong" - CDAN had a blind about JB buying JT a $25,000 diamond studded c**k ring for Christmas..

http://www.crazydaysandnights.net/2010/12/todays-blind-items_09.html


:)))
Hm..?

I said...

@Ado: The only kink in your theory (which I like), is that Justin is the top suspect for Jerry Rock-Butt...and if you read those vices he seems spot on for that.

Which is why I'm now not thinking Schlong is Justin.

But Ted is a weird one. He changes what he says a lot. For e.g., he used to say he wishes Brit and JT would get back together and then recently said he does not wish Brit and JT would get back together but instead wishes JT and Cam would get back together.


Also, I still think Princess Powder Puff is Britney, but Ted has pretty much nixed that by saying PPP was never a vice before. Just weird. Ted is a weird one.

Mikayla Marie said...

John Mayer has been linked to: Ke$ha, Scheana Marie Jancan, Kim Kardashian, and Minka Kelly (amongst the other more known conquests who already have BVs.) That might help us figure out who the party girl is. I will note I also found this article from Lainy which links Derek Jeter, Minka Kelly, ARod and Kate Hudsen all together after the Yankees won: http://www.laineygossip.com/Kate_Hudson_and_Minka_Kelly_celebrate_Yankees_win_with_ARod_and_Derek_Jeter_and_Chace_Crawford_tags_.aspx?CatID=0&CelID=20259

Does Anyone know if ARod is still dating Cameron Diaz? I know Tara suggested him and put up a ton of good reasons before for it being him and Schaena Marie but maybe it could be Minka Kelly with all of her connections.

angela said...

Between the "groupies all over the world" and "knows how to command a room" descriptions, and with 2 of the 3 And it Aint's being in the music industry, I'd say King Schlong is a live performer and front man, probably in the music field.. The "good looking in that yeah, I know I'm the s--t kind of way" indicates he probably has bad boyish looks and is known for his swagger and attitude.

My best guesses: either Adam Levine (Maroon 5) or Caleb Followill (Kings of Leon)

Anna said...

I actually really like the Caleb Followill guess. "King is king for a reason" and "King Schlong has his moniker for a reason" could be a thinly veiled reference to Kings of Leon. He is dating that Victoria's Secret chick and during the fashion show this year they did a lot of coverage about it. To me, groupies indicates sports or music. The only thing I'm not so sure about is I'm not sure if they qualify for a "high profile relationship". But I like him more so than Adam Levine since Maroon 5 is more or less over. Not huge anymore.

If we are talking about timing too, Kings of Leon was just announced as one of the headliners for Coachella (along with Kanye West! so there's a link with the AIAs) a couple days ago. While that might not be major news to the whole country, LA area is buzzing. Coachella is huge there, tons of celebs (Hiltons, Jay-Z, Katy Perry, Danny DeVito, John Mayer, Rachel Bilson) are there every year.

But overall, this blind is pretty vague. I am going with Caleb but not with any true certainty.

The Spie said...

JT is Jerry Rock-Butt. That was cinched when Ted essentially outed Chris Pine as Hornius Thighs by saying that Pine played a supporting role in a BV, and Hornius Thighs was the only supporting male role in the time period between when Ted said that Pine wasn't a BV and that he was. That leads to Olivia Munn being She-Devil Dees and Timberlake being Jerry.

Lesson: don't listen to the idiot who maintains the Usenet group. He's/she's blown it on numerous Ted BVs before, and get rid of all thoughts of Timberlake from your mind.

Dave said...

Surely the L.A. party girl has to be Cameron Diaz?

She's been linked to Gerard Butler, who also dated Reese Witherspoon, and she's been linked with John Mayer and Bradley Cooper (who passed the herpes on to Crescent via his publicist).

I posted this on another forum, but for some reason Chris Martin comes to mind for King Schlong. He and Gwyneth have been seen out and about with Cameron D, and there is nothing in the BV that rules out a married couple. "Eternal bachelor" might be a hint at something like a song title rather than marital status.

I've emailed Ted to ask if King S's girl or the LA party girl already have a BV moniker, as we can't rule out anyone just because their existing moniker isn't mentioned here. Ted might've thought it was too obvious.

The Spie said...

Dave: Good idea. Obviously Diaz is the prime candidate for Prius Crotch-Catch, but her BV identity is still in doubt (personally, I think the name's too obvious; Ted only gets that obvious when he wants to make sure everyone knows the BV's identity).

I still think Party Girl is the key to everything, but I still think she has to be a civilian. With those connections that Ted's mentioned, the odds of her not having a BV name are minimal at best, and I think that Ted would have used it in this situation.

jewlo75 said...

i thought prince william at first until i kept reading and saw that was kind of impossible...

amanda_pellegrino said...

I think it is ARod. Cameron Diaz has been all around the world with him recently despite the fact that he is such a slut. Lainey has been all over this pathetic crap lately. I say Ted C. has caught on to what Lainey has been noticing too. It is ARod.

Tara said...

Welcome back, Spie! We missed you and your logic:)

I was thinking.....what if LA party chick IS Kesha? She has been linked to Mayer (she wears garbage, don't think poop would bother her all that much) AND she performed on SNL when Ryan Phillippe hosted last year, which could've easily lead to a hookup after working together. That's a double link to the BV clues and it makes sense that Ted would call her a party girl instead of a singer because it would reflect how seriously he doesn't take her as an artist. If we could link her to a suspect, we could call it a day!

angela said...

re: Keisha

Just my opinion for what it's worth.. if Ted were to do as you suggested, ignoring what a person is primarily noted for as if it didn't exist just because he doesn't like the job they're doing and labeling them something obscure like party girl instead, it would reduce his blinds to gibberish not worth investigating. In this instance for example, you could probably count the number of young female Hollywood celebrities who DON'T party on one hand.

Felix said...

I don't think it's Kesha. She would get her own name I'm sure. The party girl is merely a professional partier and slut, which obviously does NOT warrant a moniker.

I like the Caleb Followill guess too. Yeah I know I'm the shit is definitely about attitude.

angela said...

Other possible indications that this could be Caleb, and I write this with some hesitation because it includes a bit of crude language and I don't want to offend anyone or break this blogs rules, are the following quote from an Esquire Magazine interview he did, and lyrics to a song he recently wrote:

"On the last album, a lot of the songs were about my d*ck," says Caleb Followill, the Kings of Leon's principal singer and songwriter. After about a ten count, he reconsiders: "Come to think of it, my d*ck's all over this record, too. No doubt it is."

http://www.esquire.com/style/fashion0407

Additionally, the song lyrics for “Mi Amigo” on KOL's latest album "Come Around Sundown" include these:

“I’ve got a friend who helps me to get up again, showers me in booze and tells me I’ve got a big old d*ck.”

findingserenity said...

My first thought was Jay z. He had an article in Rolling Stone calling him "The King of America". And he is always referring himself as king.

Cecilia00 said...

On the Adam Levine guess:

He was rumored to have had an affair wit Jessica Simpson, who of course, dated Mayer, who is top suspects for SDC

Adrienne said...

I am still thinking Leo. The week before in an article Ted said if Leo had it his way, he'd like to be eternally single. He also is out in Hwood whenever Bar is away. He has recently been snapped numerous times overseas with her. He was king of the world (titanic) and he stole JEWELS in CATCH ME if You Can. He is as big in the box office as johnny depp, and I think the other it aints were designed to throw people off by thinking it was JT- if they don't already know he is Jerry butt rock. Also, leo was caught bringing Lohan and friends home after the club for a party a many times last year, and she had also been seen out with Mayer.

Adrienne said...

I forgot to mention leo played King Louis in Man in the Iron Mask as well..

Haley said...

I think the party girl is Jasmine Waltz. She has been linked to John Mayer. With all the recent bad press about the whole David Arquette fiasco, it would make sense that King's woman would be "especially" upset over him sleeping with her. It must be someone well known for being a slut, and Jasmine Waltz definitely is!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
It's pretty quiet around Leonardo DiCaprio. What's going on with him? There are constant rumors of engagement and marriage. Any truth to that? Is he ready to settle down, or he is just enjoying the advantages of a steady girlfriend? He doesn`t strike me as the marrying kind
—JenRon

Dear Commitment-Phobe:
Right you are, Jen. Bar Refaeli is gorgeous, don't get me wrong, but Leo knows there are way too many up-and-coming models in his future. Don't expect him to put a ring on it anytime soon."

blurry vice said...

Hi Spie! Are you up for a Jason Segel timeline (see Adam Pounce Prick) ;)

Anyhoo people, this isn't Justin Timberlake, John Mayer, George Clooney, or Leo D. See "list of teds bv reveals"

With that being said, I think the above letter about Leo + "king" still makes me think this is Leo. But if we are all following Ted's "rules" it's not him.

blurry vice said...

By the way I do NOT think the LA party chick is Cameron Diaz. This is "a well known LA party chick" not an actress. If it were someone significant I think they would have gotten a nickname. Just some random ho from LA I think IMO.

Saleant said...

Not that it's a hobby but... how have we not discussed that Leo is one of the biggest men in Hollywood.
http://www.aceshowbiz.com/news/view/w0002236.html

Tara said...

I guess I should clarify, Angela. That was kind of half serious, because I think she is a one-trick pony and to some, she is not a serious musician. There are several other BVs where the supporting act does not get a name, even if they are significant or worthy of their own name. This might be because they already have one and he does not want it to be too obvious (like making sure Nevis Devine's name never crosses paths with Kristen's BV name), or he is saving it for when he has enough to intro them into their own BV. For him to kind of just call her a party chick, it would be because she is not important in this BV other than being scandalous for sleeping with someone else's man. Similar to why Ted chose not to name "the bisexual star" and "gay loving chick" in the Crescent Kumquat herpes blind--not relevant or too close for comfort legality wise.

I totally agree that this is more than likely someone like Scheana Marie or Jasmine Waltz. Kesha would just be an interesting twist....especially since she has a Ryan Phillippe (AKA Shafterella bitch boy) connection. I don't like to stray from Ted's rules much either since it makes every theory null and void, but he bends and twists as much as he can. Speaking of that, generally speaking for this blind, we can't entertain those who already have been confirmed to have unsolved BVs for a brand new BV name, as that would also nullify any and every guess or theory we have at this site.

@Findingserenity--I like the Jay-Z guess. King Hov/King of Hip Hop, and Beyonce has officially been named the Queen of Pop by Billboard. I would like to see what career arena Schlong is in, if it is music, he would definitely warrant some attention. This Rolling Stone article adds to your theory:

http://www.rollingstone.com/music/news/how-jay-z-became-king-inside-the-new-issue-20100609

Caz1310 said...

OMG if this is Jay-Z. He certainly strikes me as arrogant enough to do this. There was an article some years back about a girl who was in several of those rapper videos and she openly spoke of how much some of the girls got to do the dirty with Jay-Z and others and how little these fellas respect their girlfriends and women in general (she may have written a book about it?). This girl in particular had sex with him in the limo whilst he was with Beyonce in the early days. Wish I could recall her name. Their relationship strikes me as a little odd...surely she doesn't expect/believe that he is faithfull to her yet with all her self-respect empowering songs I wouldn't have thought she'd put up with a cheating husband. Unless she really doesn't know or want to know IDK. Watching this one with interest.

Stacey said...

My first thought reading this one was Jay-Z and Beyonce. So I'll second that guess. I don't think the description of the guy fits Timberlake. Good looking in a "you know I'm the ish" kind of way? So his attitude is what makes him goodlooking, not his looks. Could maybe be A-Rod/Cameron or Derek/Minka, but they are still more conventionally good-looking I think.

Brianne said...

This has got to be Caleb from Kings of Leon. They're HUGE in Europe and Australia... they have a way bigger following over there than in the United States. And...he just proposed to his Victoria's Secret Model GF - I think the "calling it off" is a reference to a wedding....

Brianne said...

This has got to be Caleb from Kings of Leon. They're HUGE in Europe and Australia... they have a way bigger following over there than in the United States. And...he just proposed to his Victoria's Secret Model GF - I think the "calling it off" is a reference to a wedding....

Felix said...

I am with Adrienne. So many references in the blind hint at Leo. I am currently watching Titanic and the King of the World is great thinking! It's not too obvious but a great reference nonetheless.

Leo is certainly someone who has groupies. And him and Bar are definitely high profile. And I've often heard that he's a sexaholic!

Tara said...

People, read the List of Ted's BV reveals! Leonardo DiCaprio would be a great guess if he was not still confirmed to have a BV as of 3/10/10. He does fit a lot of this, but like Jessica Simpson (top guess for Julep Jiggle/Impenna Never Trated/Lucretia Johnson/a bunch more), he cannot be the popular guess for several BVs when we have the documented timelines of confirmation/denial to back us up. Because he was confirmed to have a BV in 2010 (unrevealed), it is logical and reasonable to say that he cannot be a brand new BV name in 2011.

The Kings of Leon thing is much too obvious in my opinion. I don't think Ted would name a BV with the first word of their band. It is way too risky legally speaking, and to add to that, he may be hugely popular in Europe and they have had a couple of hit songs in America but I wouldn't know who you were talking about if you just said Caleb Followill. You would have to pair it with his band name and I still would not be able to pick him out of a crowd.

Caz--you are talking about the video vixen, Karinne Steffans I believe? She humped all the rappers and wrote a tell-all with fake names. If you think about it, he still sings about effing then showing them the door and what not. I doubt he is doing that with Beyonce! And she doesn't seem like the type to put up with crap like that (but her mom did so maybe that is all she knows).

Caz1310 said...

Tara I just googled Karinne and yes, that's her!!!!! I don't know what info there is to link her to the LA party girl bit of the BV. Bey and Jay both have a lot to lose if they split up - they have more cachet together than apart - and imagine the PR fallout (they'd become just another celebrity divorced couple). With all their wealth, assets and much time spent apart I imagine they'd find it easier to stay together. I confess to knowing nothing about Kings of Leon so can't comment on how much this fits their lead singer.

Caz1310 said...

Sorry, meant to say NOT much time spent together for Bey and Jay! Also, if this is them Ted would be tricky so not to be too obvious.

angela said...

Ok Tara, but every time I read the vice I'm more convinced it's Caleb. "He's King Schlong for a reason": Kings of Leon, and brags about his mini-me a lot. Short of Ted revealing King Schlong's identity, if it is Caleb, use of that moniker poses no legal risk. If that were the case, the mere similarity would pose a legal risk now, whether it really is Caleb or not.

It's interesting that you're so unfamiliar with KOL because they've been big in this country too since 2009. Their album "Only by The Night" went multi-platinum, and spawned their huge Grammy winning hit "Sex On Fire". It's actually difficult to enter a CD store without seeing a poster of them hanging somewhere.

pomme said...

i think KS is a musician("groupie") and Adam Levine(Maroon 5) is a serial player(Cameron Diaz, a tenniswoman...)who is engaged now but Joan Rivers said he is known in all the LA party circuit

Tara said...

Angela did I do something to offend you? Because it seems you are kind of picking on everything I say. If you have your opinions and arguments, great, but keep it general. I have heard of Kings of Leon. I can recognize a couple of their songs and read all the crap about how big o fans Robsten is of them. There are so many alternative rock bands busting on the scene these days, if it is not your kind of music, it becomes hard to keep them all straight unless they have a really distinguishable trait (eg a girl singer like Paramore). Sorry if it is irritating that I don't even know what he looks like. I don't think I am alone in that--which is why everyone isn't jumping on the train. He is known for being in Kings of Leon, which is why Ted would not use that as his BV name...almost as bad as using Caleb as the first name of the BV would. If this were Adam Levine for example, Ted would not call the BVer Maroon Johnson--because it would be a blatant reference to the celeb himself...IE grounds for legal ramifications based on the insinuation. Bottom line--he is more careful than that. I see you are convinced and that is totally great, I just don't agree. I would like to encourage you to ask Ted a few questions to help or eliminate your theory, and I will humbly eat my words if all signs point to him. No hard feelings!

Caz I completely agree! If it is a musician, it would be unexpected and clever for it to be Jay--totally Ted's style!

The Spie said...

Blurry: I'll try to get it done within the next few days. Have a weird work schedule this week. Adam Pounce-Prick is one of the more open BVs of recent vintage, and it'd be nice to have it off the table.

angela said...

Tara, no, you didn't do anything to offend me. Your rationale in a couple instances seemed a bit off to me, and in the interest of advancing the cause of arriving at Schlong's true identity, I respectfully tried to rectify that. It's suddenly clear that you believe you know best, as evidenced by your long dissertations rejecting any challenge, so have at it. I'll be biting my lip from now on.

kadixonlaw said...

I agree that the "calls it off" line is a big clue that this is an engaged couple. Derek Jeter and Caleb Followill definitely fit on that count.

While I don't see Leo fitting this blind at all, I posed this question in another thread and I'm hoping the experts can provide some input:

Regarding the Leo DiCaprio guesses, it is my understanding that when Ted first started the blinds, he wasn't assigning names to the subjects. I've seen in previous blind comments that it may be possible for the same individual to have a very old un-named blind that hasn't been revealed and then to be assigned a name in a newer blind.

That being said, according to the the sisters' List of Ted's Reveals, Leonardo DiCaprio was confirmed to have a blind "ages ago, as of 3/10/10."

So, isn't it at least possible (without nullifying the rules) that he might be eligible for another blind (not this one!) or am I completely bonkers? ; )

Just said...

angela I actually think you made good sense and were very nice about it..
by the way kings of leon took home 3 grammys last year including top honor for record of the year..
i'm on the caleb is king schlong train too

Stacey said...

I agree with Caz about Ted trying to not make it too obvious if it's Jay and B.

I don't think it's Caleb Followill b/c his model girlfriend is not very high profile. They're only really known to celeb gossip followers or Kings of Leon fans. And yes, I like Kings of Leon. But outside of their target age group, they are not as well known. I think one day they will be though.

I think the "equally yummy" line lends itself to Jay and B - both hot, both respected, both talented, both big money makers. As for flaunting her all over, Jay and B are often photographed in Italy, Paris...they are big travelers and spenders.

I'm looking on whosdatedwho.com now to see if I can find any party girl links between John Mayer and Reese...I like the Jasmine Waltz guess but I haven't found anything concrete yet. As for Karrine Steffans I think her party girl days have largely ended.

Tara said...

@Angela, I welcome the challenge, far from stifle it. I disagree with personal attacks within a debate and you just got personal. I won't apologize for debating what I believe in, but like I said, I would gladly give you credit where it is due if this starts to look like Caleb. I do not feel I need to be right all the time, in fact, I gave Finding Serenity props above for the Jay-Z guess. Am I long winded, yes, at times--but that's how I roll when I have interest in something (I will own up to that). But I also appreciate that the BIE community can go back and forth hard on one thread and then completely agree in the next. I absolutely meant no offense.

Michelle said...

Could the LA party chick be Kristin Cavallari? I know she has a link to John Mayer-would that take us somewhere? Or do we think Ted would refer to her as a reality star instead?

My first thought upon reading though is the the party girl is more anonymous, along the lines of the chick that became famous for five minutes for sleeping with David Arquette.

Karinne is a great name to put out there, too. Tara, you've been doing a lot of the heavy lifting on this one!

MH

Melissa said...

Well I think we can pretty much "Not" A-Rod for this one, LOL...sounds like he's not such a "king" in the schlong department!

http://www.blinditemsexposed.com/search/label/Alex%20Rodriguez

The Spie said...

Melissa: You're forgetting the A-Rod/centaur picture, thus leading to the obvious "hung like a horse" comment. Not that I'm saying it's him. We definitely need more clarification on Party Girl.

angela said...

Tara, I did NOT 'attack' you. HOW DARE YOU. Who you think you are? I won't be back.

Just said...

thin skinned arrogant bayatch comes to mind
thinks she knows it all and owns this blog

Felix said...

I don't think I'd call Jay-Z good looking, yummy or hot.

Eternal bachelor? I think KS and his yummy counterpart have only recently gotten together.

Pep said...

I like the Jay-Z guess.

The other one that came to mind is Andy Roddick. He does not fit all the clues (can't associate him with the AIAs), but he does have a "gorgeous" lady and was tied at one point to Paris Hilton.

Tara said...

Spie, love that you brought up the centaur portrait! It is good to see your posts. Michelle, I forgot about that whole A Rod thing where he only cared about keeping the reputation of his mr peepers in tact! He is obviously obsessed with himself in general. I would like to believe that means he has a baby carrot peen, but we can't rule him out just yet....

Felix I agree that Jay is not traditionally good looking, but he does have the "I'm the ish" swagger that makes the ladies swoon--and he is talented. I sent in a couple questions, did anyone else?

Anna said...

The more and more I read this the more I think it is Caleb . I agree that putting the King for KOL is ballsy, but he makes two very distinct references (as I said before) that he is King/has his moniker for a reason. Also, to me groupies mean music or sports.

Second, and I know I'm repeating myself, but we are always talking about how Ted's blinds have so much to do with timing...this was right after Kings of Leon (and Kanye West, who is an AIA) was announced to headline Coachella, the country's biggest music festival. This is essentially one of the biggest entertainment news pieces of the year for the music world and L.A. crowd. While I can see some on this board not knowing this because they tend to follow movie/TV celebrity first and foremost, don't underestimate how huge this news is in LA, there is no way Ted would not be all over this festival. The biggest bands in the country headline and it is chock full of celebrities from every single walk of life. Just google to see how many people show up there every year (I had a list above). This is the talk of the town right now in Southern California/LA, and it is the defining event of the year for many in the music savvy 18-28 year old range in the area.

Last but not least, I truly disagree that KOL are not well known enough. They are bar none the biggest "hip" music band in the country. Use Somebody was probably the biggest single in rock (maybe music) last year, and they won a Grammy for their other song Sex on Fire. They are more or less the Maroon 5 (huge band with a slight alternative edge) of today. If Adam Levine or John Mayer were huge guesses for BVs recently (and I know Super Dooper Cooper is Mayer, but people still guess him), I really don't see how the lead singer for KOL can't be...they are every bit as relevant (and then some) as Mayer is now, and Maroon 5 is a band of the past.

Anna said...

How do you write a guess to Ted?

Anna said...

It says "Forbbiden, You don't have permission to access /services/ask.jsp on this server." Hah I know this isn't the most tech savvy group, but has anybody had this happen to them before? I'm trying to ask him a question to see if there has been a BV about any of the four Coachella headliners this year (Kanye, KOL, Arcade Fire, The Strokes).

Stacey said...

Anna - Caleb is a legit guess. We can't rule him out. I agree that they are the hip band of the moment. But here's my perspective. My friends and I are all turning 30this year and we're not as familiar with the bands of the moment. If I asked 10 friends if they've heard of KOL, 8 would likely say yes. If I asked 10 if they've heard of Caleb F, 8 would likely say, who? People my age are not too familiar with Caleb yet. He does a pretty good job keeping himself out of the mainstream tabloids.

Now, I certainly think he's important enough to do a blind on. But I think Ted would be more specific in pointing him out for those of us that wouldn't know. Like making more of a point that he's young and from a hip band of the moment. I just don't think he and his girl are high profile enough to Ted's general audience to fit this blind. But that doesn't mean I am right. It could be him for the reasons you stated.

I think guessing him to Ted is a good idea. Hopefully someone will guess Jay and B. Maybe they'll both be notted and then we'll have to start guessing again.

P.S. I really do think Caleb will become more well known to us eventually. The band has alot of potential.

Tara said...

Anna, were you able to submit? Sometimes I get a weird white screen that has some error message. I wonder if it happens when E online has a lot of traffic or something. You may have to wait a bit then go back. That is a great question to ask. I asked one on the Jay Z side, so maybe one way or another it will shed some light.

Stacey said...

Oh good Tara. Glad you asked him. I hope he comments on the Caleb/Jay questions. I always have problems with e's site so I've given up asking. They really need to fix that.

Anna said...

Tara: Yeah, keep getting a white screen. I think my question is good because even if this is not Caleb, it might make him say that one of the headliners was indirectly involved in a Blind Vice, which would then probably be Kanye in the Carmelita Salami Climber vice.

I'm going to try from my work computer tomorrow, maybe then it will work.

Stacey: Hmm, I see what you are saying. A-List couple they are not. It could easily be me just super excited about Coachella in general (although I doubt I'll actually watch KOL, rather see the Chemical Brothers that night). I still think a lot points to him (including the timing), but you are right, he may not be enough of a household name by himself. Hopefully I can eventually get my guess in and get it answered.

Duskyjewel said...

I don't think it is related to Coachella at all. Ted's BVs are primarily celebs coveted by the MSM. KOL is a big band, but I can recall zero gossipy stuff surrounding them or other alternative acts. For instance, Pete Wentz would be a better guess (not that I think it is him) as he is probably known by most Americans as Ashley Simpson's hubby and Jessica's bro-in-law and not as a member of Fall Out Boy. Caleb is not a household name in that sense and not someone about which the average American would be interested to know a vice.

Ted is loopy when it comes to the previous BV thing. I often wonder if he flat out lies...like Princess Powder Puff, for instance :-)

Cecilia00 said...

Ted has eliminated Caleb in todays Bitch-Back.

Stacey said...

Tara, is this you? Great question! Problem is I have no clue what his answer means!


"Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong's woman a superstar in her own right? And how about that party hoochie he tapped on the side—is she a household name or just a star effer?
—Tara

Dear Large 'n' in Charge:
Schlong likes his women long and beautiful, just like him, if you know what I mean. All his female friends and benefits are superstars—as for those on the side who really cares. They're only temporary anyway."

Duskyjewel said...

I saw that, too!!! I also saw "cheapskatemama"! Nearly fell out bed (was reading on phone).

@Tara...TWO answered questions. What's you're secret?

Cathy said...

Tara-

I realize that this is a little late (I've been out of town on business), but I just wanted to let you know that I really like your long-winded responses. It's so much better than someone saying "It's Leo!!!" and then not offering anything to back that up with. The intelligent comments, where people actually put thought into what they say are why I come to this site, rather than reading through the crap that people post in the comments section on Ted's site.

Tara said...

Wow, thanks for all the love:) @Stacey, I was totally confused by that answer too. I am getting the feeling he may mean models, that is what comes to mind with the long & lean. That is likely going to spark more Leo guesses. I don't know what to think, other than it seems it is not someone who necessarily brags about the size of his wang cuz he doesn't have to! Doesn't exactly help our Jay guess.....

@dusky, I know! I rarely get more than one, but when I have more than one question, I use a few emails (I have 2 work and a home address) and a couple different names. It has worked well for me for a while. Rita also has said that she sends a few at a time, and she gets in there regularly too. I wondered if you would notice that one since you saw my blog site (ps you need to see my cheap makeup post from lastnight)!

@Cathy, I appreciate that, the above statements were kind of unsettling. I have a weird, nerdy obsession with research and when paired with something else I love, like celeb gossip or shopping--it might be overwhelming to some, but just trying to be thorough! It is nice to come here to get away from the Robstenites or Krisbians or whatever and talk with you ladies and gents;)

Mena said...

Tara, I think what Ted means by long and lean is people like Cameron Diaz and Kate Hudson. He also mentioned that all his female friends and benefits are superstars which Cameron and Kate are and in addition that would include Madonna (friends, benefits).

Doesn't his answer sort of confirm that he's talking about ARod?

Tara said...

I could see that, Mena. It definitely does not refer to bootylicious Beyonce! I surely could see this being A-Rod. As Spie mentioned, the dude has a self portrait of him as a centaur (I died when I read that)! But if he is very concerned about keeping up the rumor that he is packing heavy then is he embellishing, which Ted said KS doesn't need to do? I hope Ted answers a question about his career soon, that will help.

Adrienne said...

I really took long and lean to bo a model that King Schlong dates. Also, I took it that we have to think quite a bit bigger than a sorts/roskstar. I hear superstar and feel like that refers to a movie celeb.
I agreed with the commenter that said they assumed Leo was an old unnamed vice and therefore fair game. Before you tell me to read the list of reveals again, I think if Ted mentioned Leo a long time ago as an unnamed supporting BV, this could very possibly still be Leo.
For those who do agree with this hunch, I recently read an article that when Leo was at Jeremy Renner's 40th, he spent the entire night talking and flirting with Blake Lively. Does anyone know if Blake has an connection to Crescent at all?
as a refesher as to why I like Leo:
-never been named a prime suspect in other BV's and could be one of Ted's old "unnamed".
-Was King Louis in Man in the Iron Mask, and King of the World in Titanic.
-Catch Me if You Can reference- in which he also stole jewels.
-Dates supermodel he recently has been snapped taking to other countries.
-In article last week on E, was said to want eternal singlehood.
- Widely reported to have after hours parties after nights out in hollywood when Bar is away (Lindsay Lohan was among the girls that would part-take, and she had also been reportedly out with John Mayer and tweeting with him to nix any hook-up rumors)
Sorry for the long winded explanation, but I just want to make sure we aren't hastily overlooking Leo.

findingserenity said...

I still like jay-z for this since Ted said "long and beautiful" not necessarily lean. Does a-rod have groupies and a high profile relationship that he travels with all over the world?

Tara said...

If this were A-Rod, I think that would refer to Cameron. You are right, it does say that, I think the two words go hand in hand and it stuck in my head! So this doesn't take away from J at all. But it doesn't help clear anything up either!

Jamee said...

Wow, Tara. It takes some serious holding back to not even comment on the fact that "Just" called you a "thin skinned arrogant bayatch." What's happening to this site?

Tara said...

Jamee, where have you been! I have missed you! I have had a squabble before on here and I did not like the back and forth, the debate is fun as long as it doesn't get personal. I really had to hold back on that and I trust that the sisters don't approve of that kind of name-calling either. How's it going for you?

julie said...

I am going with A-Rod on this one. Lainey likes to say that Gwyneth has been responsible for setting Kate and Cam up with him, and that could be what Ted means by this "female friends and benefits are superstars"?

http://www.laineygossip.com/Gwyneth_Paltrow_Cameron_Diaz_take_helicopter_to_celebrate_600_homeruns_with_Alex_Rodriguez_06aug10.aspx

Tara said...

And add Madonna to that list--another Goopy pal (or ex, can't keep up)!

Caz1310 said...

Dagnabbit hotdiggety - thought we had this one in the bag. Beyonce is described as having a great body and at a stretch long n lean when she loses heaps of weight for movie roles (eg. Dreamgirls). Not giving up yet on this being Jay & Bey although am not 100% anymore LOL. Adrienne have a look at Crescent Kumquat - Chace Crawford is top suspect for that (GG link to Blake...to Leo). Ted's messing with our heads now if this is possibly Leo. One of the things that separates this site from others is that we're nice to each other. Nasty people go away.

Tara said...

I like that sentiment--thank goodness, cuz we don't need it here! Don't really love being called a B too much, and I can't say many others here would either (except in the loving form, of course;). I think I need to probe for Leo's BV a little more, to shed some light. Ted is maddening!

Dollie said...

I asked Ted on his Facebook page about Jay-Z and he said I wasn't even close. So, I have no clue. A random guess now is Ryan Seacrest. He is known as quite the stud around town.

Guesswho said...

The BV says King is an "eternal bachelor". Would this rule out A-Rod since he's been married already? Also, there is also the phrase "calls it off" which implies that the couple is engaged?

As for the Caleb/Kings of Leon guess, I had no idea who this Caleb guy was until I read this thread so the BV is not blatantly obvious to mainstream folks who don't follow music.

I really think this sounds like Leo. But the whole "commanding a room" and "groupies" reference implies an athlete or singer.

Tara said...

Dollie, way to go! Ted has been on his Facebook page a lot lately, that might be a great way to communicate with him instead of trying to break through the wall of Robsten mail he gets daily. Here is a cut and paste of her post:

Dollie: Hey Ted. Is "King Schlong" Jay Z? ...

January 21 at 11:28am ·LikeUnlike · Comment · View Feedback (1)Hide Feedback (1)


Ted Casablanca: no way, not even close!
Tuesday at 4:51pm · LikeUnlike · .

Clancy said...

When I first read this post I immediately thought of Katy Perry and Russell Brand. (Actually, reading the title my first thought was Rob Schneider lol.)

I know someone else mentioned K&R earlier too - and why not? He's not yet confirmed as Altar-Ego Salami and the wealth of clues fit him:

1) He's in a v. high profile r'ship with Katy P, a yummy counterpart.

2) He has groupies - Katy is often making comments like 'Back off ladies!' and all the 20-somethings at work think he's hot (god knows why).

3) He's totally got that 'I'm the shit' attitude.

4) He's British so the language fits (royal, shagging, crown jewels). Plus he uses the word 'shag' himself a lot.

5) Call it off = the wedding, although I'll concede this is something you're more likely to say about an engagement.

6) Eternal bachelor - well, he did have the ultimate rock n' roll life pre-Katy and old habits die hard.

I think Ted saying 'No way, not even close' re Jay Z would be entirely fitting for Russell B. Black vs white, deep, resonant voice vs squeaky squawking, relaxed, thoughtful demeanour vs high-energy hijinks.

I'm not sure who the preening slut is, but I would like to think the 'honey' clue relates to her hair colour. I can't think of anyone other than Kristin Cavallari for this, but I'm sure there are more options.

While I think this is a reasonable guess, I'm still erring on the side of King Schlong being A-Rod for all the reasons mentioned and because Lainey's been covering he and Cameron's outing - and no doubt Cameron fits the 'long and lean' clue to an absolute T.

On the for side of KS being RB, I know Ted loves Katy and perhaps if he was venomous towards KS in his post it may be too much of a giveaway.

By the way, I thought Leo was gay. Is he not rumoured to be one of the closet gays in Hollywood?

Adrienne said...

Hi Caz- Thank you very much for the response (and your patience with my not giving up on Leo!). For those of you still open to the Leo idea for the earlier reasons I posted, I wanted to share a "caught in the Act" blurb that is on people today:

"The usually reserved Leonardo DiCaprio was pretty animated during his night out at Trousdale in L.A. There with a group of buddies, including Chace Crawford and Sebastian Stan, the actor puffed on a cigar and danced along to the music, lighting up especially when Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair" was played. At the next table: Ryan Phillippe, who was surrounded with his group of friends."

Found this interesting as they are usually a couple of weeks behind reported sitings, and this puts Leo in proximity to a Shaft ex, as well as a probable Crescent.

Tara said...

Clancy! You got me all confused. Great argument for RB. We have to find out what KS does for a living. If he isn't an actor type, I hope Ted would answer if he was a sports superstar. You know, with the blind (Lainey?) that was brought up earlier about him trying to preserve the rumor of his penis size--makes me wonder, if it is A-Rod and he paid Ted to write this;)

Adrienne, you are right, Leo seems to be a shoe in for this if he did not have a BV name that was unsolved. I did not see that article, so those are some strong connections to the BV names listed. I asked yesterday if King Schlong has ever had another BV name. I hope he starts answering some Leo questions, you know he is getting them. I know how much this sounds so much like him, but what worries me is that what walks like a duck, sounds like a duck, is usually a cow when it comes to Ted!

Adrienne said...

Hi Tara, thanks all the great info. Yes that is how Ted rolls a lot isn't it? Though, have you been getting the feeling I have that when it comes to cheaters he gets a little more obvious? Calling him king schlong is a good Leo clue, but not enough to be a dead give away. Glad he notted Prince William today so no one takes the King clue that far. I also thought he tried to make people who didn't know about Jerry Rock Butt think this could be timberlake (an obvious moniker for the cheater). Recent articles appearing about his being with Blake Lively all night at Renner's partay and his recent surroundings with our other mentioned vicers was quite interesting- and timely since People usually runs a bit behind the actual happening.. unfortunate there were not pictures so we could see what ladies were in attendance. Not sure Ted would have gotten a heads up on the people article to be purposely obvious. I am really crossing my fingers he answers your question so we can move him up the list or not him altogether. Ted can be sneaky, and I am still suspicious that the old BV of Leo may not have been in the days he named them- hence his getting around his own 'rule'.
I am getting the same white screen you were getting when I asked a question. Did they go through anyway?

Cathy said...

The only problem is that even if Ted says that KS has not had a previous BV name, it could still be Leo - if his was from before monikers were given.

blurry vice said...

More hinting from Ted about Leo. Either King Schlong is Leo, or Ted is hinting that he is to throw everyone off.

http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/the_awful_truth/b222511_caught_andy_dicks_looking_heimlichs.html

blurry vice said...

I'm so sorry that someone has resorted to name calling on our blog. Please, no profanity and name calling people.

Tara said...

@Adrienne, word on everything you just said and I wish I was at Trousdale with those 3, though I likely might have had a seizure induced by all the hot viceyness.

@Cathy--Nooooo! Don't say that! It makes my brain hurt;)

Clancy said...

Tara, I think asking Ted what side of the pond KS is on should also help - hopefully he'll bite so we can eliminate him. I just have to get past the white screen of death...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Wondering about King Schlong—please say it isn't Caleb Followill. I know he's got a bit of an attitude, but I don't think he's in a high-profile

relationship.
—Plpmoichis

Dear Schlong Lovin':
Uh, no. Hope that helps you sleep at night! Give the King a little more credit. Believe me, this guy is not overcompensating for anything.

Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong's woman a superstar in her own right? And how about that party hoochie he tapped on the side—is she a household name or just a star effer?
—Tara

Dear Large 'n' in Charge:
Schlong likes his women long and beautiful, just like him, if you know what I mean. All his female friends and benefits are superstars—as for those on the

side who really cares. They're only temporary anyway.

Dear Ted:
Can you please tell me that my dear sweet Prince William is not King Schlong. He seems too charming to be a Vice, and I would be so disappointed in him!

Kisses.
—E

Dear Schlong Charmed:
Are you kidding me? You think I'd blast royalty on the blog? I want an invite to that fab wedding, duh!

Dear Ted:
Does King Schlong know he got herpes from his encounter? Or is he too busy spreading it around to care?
—d0li

Dear Gets Around:
Who said he has herpes? So far haven't heard any complaints in King's penis department."

Felix said...

I'm still with Adrienne. "Long and beautiful" is definitely meant to hint at models. And yes I do take long to also mean lean.

LdC has dated:
Naomi Campbell
Helena Christensen
Eva Herzigova
Gisele B√ľndchen
among others

I mean, hello? Models galore! And they are all superstars more or less.

Katie said...

I'm still new at this, so you can tell me if I'm completely wrong, but hey, I'm learning! :]

Anyways, someone I thought of was Jason Statham. I know that he's a suspect for Buddy Rib-Toast, but I couldn't help but notice some clues. The "King" clue, he starred in a movie, "In the Name of the King," and he's dating Victoria Secret's supermodel Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. I know she's a top suspect, but Ted never mentioned a name for the girlfriend. Plus, he's from Britain, which could be the who;e "royalty" hint.

I'm probably way off, but it was just a guess :D

Tara said...

We gotta close in on Leo in one way or another, it will be hard to think that it is anyone else based on how Ted is swaying things. I was reading through some old BB comments and Ted was quoted as saying "The obvious choice is never the right one" in reference to his BVs. If we learned KS' field of work, this might make it a bit easier (stress the "might").

Katie I think that is a great guess! Love Statham. I know he was linked to Kristin Cavallari right around or before he and Rosie moved in together. If she were the well known LA party girl, that would be believable, she has boinked Super Duper too I believe. If you can link her to someone Reese Witherspoon has been involved with then it is a contending guess, IMO:)

Felix said...

The problem with Jason Statham is Ted's BB about KS's female friends and benefits being superstars.

I understand it to mean that KS is probably A-list and his friends ("friends") and sexual encounters ("benefits") are way up in the alphabet, too. Probably A-listers as well. Which brings us back to Leo.

Tara said...

Felix, I think Statham could be A list; maybe B depending on how you look at it. The Transporter 1-3, Crank 1 & 2, the Expendables....And his girlfriend is important enough to have her own BV. He is one of the top action stars right now. I do get what you are saying, we can't really compare apples to oranges as Leo is a real superstar no doubt. But "superstar" has many different meanings to Ted. Take his BV Superstar gallery for example....Robin Leach is in it! But if we were to get Leo notted in one way or another, Statham is worth looking into along with A-Rod and Jeter.

Lindsay said...

I followed up on the Ryan Seacrest idea:
- In the news within the past week as Larry King's stylist
- Larry King's choice to take over his talk show
- American Idol fans all over the world
- That I can recall has taken GF Julianne Hough to Italy, Bahamas, and recently Paris
- Per Wiki via People first role in school theater was King Winter
-36 and never married

Felix said...

I thought it's common knowledge that Seacrest hunts in the same grounds as Toothy Tile.

Katie said...

I agree with Tara on the fact that Jason Statham is an A list star if you account all of his action flicks, but of course, Leo is way more A list. I like both guesses, but the problem is both of them are thought to be other BV's, so that would mean that we were wrong on the others.

Tara said...

Katie I forgot about Buddy Rib-Toast, and that was my suggestion (Statham)! How sad is that?! Here's to hoping this week sheds some light. I don't remember the last time I felt so all over the map with a BV.

Tara said...

So KS' main girl does not have a BV herself (too boring, said Ted today) and he alludes to KS not being foreign. Doesn't do anything to hurt the Leo theory, but it does eliminate Statham.

Mena said...

Agree. It eliminates Statham. And I think it also eliminates A-Rod since I don't think Ted considers Cameron as too boring.

I do think that Minka Kelly could be considered boring. So I'm back to thinking this is about Derek Jeters.

Felix said...

Tara were both of those BB's yours? :D

I'm a bit puzzled about the "nothing fancy like Michelob, think more Bud" comment?!

I kind of get "sweet girl" from Bar Rafaeli whenever I see her. No BV material I'd say.

Tara said...

Mena, I agree, Minka is definitely boring, but so is Bar Refaeli so we still can't narrow that down (grr).

Felix, what can I say, it has been a good couple weeks in the BBs for me;)

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Does King Schlong's main chica have a separate B.V. of her own?
—Tara

Dear Two to Vice:
That would be a no. Talk about blah toast, that's King Schlong's gal."

"Dear Ted:
If King Schlong were a beer, would he be an import or domestic?
—T

Dear Home Turf:
Domestic. And nothing fancy like Michelob, think more Bud."

Ross Family Five said...

I just sent in a question to Ted asking if KS is an athlete. We'll see if it gets posted. I really don't want this to be Jetes, and I don't think it is, as he really is hot in general, not just in a "I know I am the sh.." kinda way. And honestly, as much as I can't stand A-Roid, he is good looking, also. So, perhaps if Ted can answer this one, we can at least rule them out.

Tuesdi said...

Hi - I am new to this, but after Ted's "BUD" comment yesterday, wouldnt this be CLOONEY? He was the Bud spokesperson (voiceover) for their commercials - maybe still is...

kadixonlaw said...

If you relate the Michelob/Bud comment to the way KS looks or dresses, it would definitely fit Leo. He always looks like he just threw on the first thing he saw when he rolled out of bed. More to the point, like a college kid.

I hope that doesn't come across as superficial. I like a jeans and t-shirt kinda guy, myself. ;)

jjonefiftypb said...

Well A-rod is out as Ted has eliminated athletes...hmmmmmm

Dear Ted:
King Schlong's B.V. has me intrigued (what can I say?). I have at least six guesses as to whom he may be. Can you help me narrow down my choices? While it is clear he is a stud between the sheets, is he an athlete?
—CinnamonGirl

Dear King of What:
Nope! Next question?

Read more: http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/the_awful_truth/b224028_bitch-back_halle_berry_really_victim.html#ixzz1CuEpOssd

Cathy said...

@Ross Family Five - was that your question that Ted answered today? If so, congrats! :)

Ado said...

@Tuesdi (and @Jennifer): that CLOONEY guess got me re-thinking my guess:
- boring but gorgeous girlfriend
- plus that "eternal bachelor" thing...


Has GC been suspected for other BVs..??

Ross Family Five said...

Yes, that was me. Honestly, I am surprised he answered it.

Kristen said...

I think it's Leo. Clooney's also known as an "eternal bachelor", but look at the "Six Degrees of BVs" game going on in this blind. All of those linked BV stars are in their 20s or 30s. Leo is 36. Clooney will be 50 in three months. Who do you think is more likely to hang out with this group of people or someone who knows these people? We already have proof that Leo at least knows Chace Crawford well enough to want to hang out with him. And Ryan Phillippe (one of Reese's exes) was at the same club, one table over.

Tara said...

Yay Ross! Great question, loved it.

George has been confirmed to have a blind vice as of '09. However, that has not stopped Leo from being a main contender here, so there is not really anything to dispute Clooney for this just as much as Leo.

Kristen said...

@Tara, Ted confirmed that Leo had been a blind vice "ages ago". If he felt the need to specify "ages ago", then it must have been several years prior, possibly before Ted started giving out nicknames. When did Ted start giving out nicknames anyway? What did his blind items look like before then?

Kristen said...

^Ted talked about Leo's BV last March.

Kadixonlaw said...

I didn't mean to open a can of worms with my loophole theory re: Leo. I just thought that "ages ago" (when Leo was confirmed to have been a blind) *may* have been far enough back to have been one of the un-named vices. I hope 2009 (Clooney's blind) isn't already considered to be ages ago... It seems like yesterday to me!

Anyhoo, blame my career field; I'm always looking for a loophole and the more we learn on this one, the more I think it points to The Modelizer himself, Leo.

Kadixonlaw said...

@Kristen... I was wondering the same exact thing. According to Ted's Wikipedia, he has been doing the AT column for a decade.

LMS130 said...

I'll wait for blurry to post the BB, but it definitely sounds like this is Adam Levine.

Cathy said...

Well it definitely isn't George Clooney, since he's done voiceover work (commercials & fantastic mr. fox). Has Leo done any of that?

Kristen said...

Leo has done voiceover work. Recently, in fact, for a 3D documentary on the Hubble Space Telescope: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1433813/

I don't know much about Adam Levine, but as of June 22, 2010, he has never been a BV, so he's a possibility. We need to find out what King Schlong's occupation is. I don't want this to turn into another Princess Powder-Puff situation.

Tara said...

I realize that people were still guessing Leo due to Ted's vague "ages ago" comment, but we cannot be sure he did or did not have an actual moniker. If we cannot be sure when Clooney's was, he falls into the same category of massive assumption. As Kadix says, it totally opens a huge can of worms (no offense to Kadix) because the floodgates now will let in all stars with BVs we have not pinpointed.

I have asked questions about KS' profession a few times to no avail (thanks Ross for yours!). Maybe asking Ted about connections to another BVer that we know the suspect has been linked to in real life will help narrow. Like if you were suspecting Adam Levine, ask if KS has ever been linked to Morgan Mayhem (ie Lindsay Lohan). Just an idea!

kadixonlaw said...

@Tara... No offense taken; however, I have to respectfully disagree with that line of thinking (no offense to you either!). Ted did pinpoint Clooney's BV on 9/19/09, "as of April, '09." I agree that we cannot be sure whether Leo has a moniker, making my theory an assumption; however, that assumption is based on logic. Ted is obviously vague (either by necessity or by nature), but he is rarely mundane or trivial. Every tidbit and phrase with Ted seems to be very pointed. Based on that, I have to agree with Kristen (which I always seem to be doing!): I think it's very telling that he confirmed Leo's BV by saying "ages ago," and not by simply giving a time frame (as he did when he confirmed Clooney's BV).

I operate under the opinion that sticking with the status quo can occassionally prevent you from seeing the clearest solution. You have mentioned several times before that Ted has indicated that the most obvious answer is usually incorrect (paraphrasing there), but we all also know that, with Ted, sometimes the most obvious answer IS the correct one (e.g. Death Mint Myrtle).

Now, I am not totally on board with Leo fitting this blind. I think great arguments can be made for this being Adam Levine. The "groupies" and "command[ing] a room" comments lead me to think this could be a musician and he is the only one (who hasn't already been eliminated) that I can see fitting here.

Again, I'm sorry to be long-winded. I really enjoy the intelligent debate that this site offers and I think that the commenters and contributers here are pretty darn awesome! : )

Stacey said...

Dear Ted:
Has King Schlong ever done any voice-over work? As always, you know I love you, although the boards are becoming very sticky wickets. Civility, anyone?
—Kate

Dear Speaking of Schlong:
Nope. He's way more into showing of that precious face of his, along with some other assets. Oh, and thanks for the love, hon!


Oh this blind is killing me. Kadix I also don't feel Leo is slam dunk for the reasons you stated. He's the best guess left, but I also think Ted is hinting at a musician. Problem is I have spent awhile trying to come up with a musician/singer guess and I can't think of anyone decent. I thought of Gene Simmons and Bret Michaels, but they seem too old. And don't really fit that well. Timberlake is already a blind...ugh.

Anyway yes the debate is very healthy on this blog. If we didn't debate we'd never figure out anything. It's why this site is so great.

Stacey said...

Oh yeah, Adam Levine could work. Who is he dating though?

kadixonlaw said...

His girlfriend is Victoria's Secret model, Anne Vyalitsyna. I think I saw that he just filmed a new video rolling around on a bed with her. LOL!

Dollie said...

Dear Ted:
My rescue grays aren't feeling the love. They are sniffing around King Schlong but want to run circles around all those other doggies that keep saying they are smarter than grays. So what they have sniffed out is this question: Is King Schlong's talent better equipped for the stage or the big screen? And has he ever been caught for Vicey behavior before this—like stealing the babe that belonged to another man's jewels?
—Olive and Tye still love you

Dear Puppy Sniffers:
I'd say the King prefers the big screen, but I wouldn't rule the stage out of question, either. He's rocked both. But trust, whatever gives him more camera time, he is bound to dive into pronto. And you're quite warm on your last query. Much woof to your rescue grays!

I think this eliminates George Clooney. I don't think he's done any Broadway and this also eliminates him being a singer.

Dollie said...

After looking at it, he could be someone like Justin Timberlake. That kind of stage. So, he could very well be a singer that has done both.

Tara said...

Dollie, you don't mean Justin though, right? Just someone who jumps from music to movies? Justin is the main suspect for Jerry Rock Butt. I can't really think of anyone else that goes back and forth like that. PS Justin really needs to take a break from the movie making and make a follow up to his last album! Loved it.

blurry vice said...

Dear Ted:
King Schlong's B.V. has me intrigued (what can I say?). I have at least six guesses as to whom he may be. Can you help me narrow down my choices? While it is

clear he is a stud between the sheets, is he an athlete?
—CinnamonGirl

Dear King of What:
Nope! Next question?

Dear Ted:
Has King Schlong ever done any voice-over work? As always, you know I love you, although the boards are becoming very sticky wickets. Civility, anyone?
—Kate

Dear Speaking of Schlong:
Nope. He's way more into showing of that precious face of his, along with some other assets. Oh, and thanks for the love, hon!

Dear Ted:
My rescue grays aren't feeling the love. They are sniffing around King Schlong but want to run circles around all those other doggies that keep saying they

are smarter than grays. So what they have sniffed out is this question: Is King Schlong's talent better equipped for the stage or the big screen? And has he

ever been caught for Vicey behavior before this—like stealing the babe that belonged to another man's jewels?
—Olive and Tye still love you

Dear Puppy Sniffers:
I'd say the King prefers the big screen, but I wouldn't rule the stage out of question, either. He's rocked both. But trust, whatever gives him more camera

time, he is bound to dive into pronto. And you're quite warm on your last query. Much woof to your rescue grays!

Tara said...

Kadix I am so glad you regognize that this site is great for debate and it is all in fun. I totally agree and love it, even when it gets heated. I respect and like your logic, even if I can't jump on the train yet;)

That being said, I was wondering if your Clooney confirmation timeline came from the List of Ted's BV reveals? Because that does not pinpoint Clooney's BV time frame other than just saying that twice in '09, someone asked if he had a BV and Ted said yes, there was no elaboration on that. The "as of" part of the documentation here is by the sisters (in my understanding), which only means in April 09 someone asked and Ted said yes. I don't even think KS is Clooney, but there is so much assumption based on Leo as a main suspect, my point is that you can assume that Clooney is KS just as easily, there is nothing preventing that other than that Ted did not elaborate on when Clooney's BV was like he did for Leo.

Now, does anyone think "stage" could mean broadway (from BB quote above), or does the word "rocked" kinda eliminate that possibility?

Kristen said...

I don't think "rocked" eliminates Broadway. But the stage reference eliminates Leo, but so did the voiceover stuff.

Ado said...

OK, now I'm totally lost.. :(

Ted notted CLOONEY, and hinted KS is younger but has the same attitude.

"Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong George Clooney?
—LM

Dear Men of a Certain Age:
George is a little too old to be Schlong'ing around, but you've nailed it in the attitude department."

I start to think that "eternal bachelor" KS is in the music business.

Maybe ENRIQUE IGLESIAS.....?????

- groupies
- attitude
- bachelor
- gorgeous babe flaunted all over the world

Ado said...

....or how 'bout JARED LETO?
- groupies
- well endowed
- but who is the girlfriend..? and no high profile relationship... :(

(I promise not to throw in any more new names, and you can rip my arguments apart..)


"Rumor has it, Jesus Luz, Madonna’s current Brazilian boy toy, is rocking an uncut member, Shia LaBeouf confessed to Playboy that he isn’t well-endowed, and Jared Leto reportedly has the biggest (living) dong in Hollywood. After the jump, celebs dish on the packages they were given or were happy/unhappy to receive."

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-celebrity-penis-quotes/

Cathy said...

So even though Ted has never answered any of my questions, I suspect that since I'm spending my day taking care of my foster pup, who is currently recovering from being spayed, he might be a little more likely to answer a question that she and I ask.

So, I could either ask him something about KS (maybe try to get him to explicitly "not" Leo) or get some information on some other BV's we've been wondering about. I've been so busy with my pup all weekend that I've fallen behind in recent BV discussions, so I'd really appreciate any suggestions you all have on questions to ask Ted. He's usually more generous in the information he gives when someone has a story about their rescue dog, so I want to make sure that I ask the best question possible :-)

c174ccde-32d7-11e0-b0de-000f20980440 said...

@Tara... I did get the Clooney timeline from the sisters' list. I didn't read it the way you described it. However, I think you may have a point there. Thanks for the fresh input! : )

@Cathy... Speaking of Tara, she made a really good suggestion (on February 4):

"Maybe asking Ted about connections to another BVer that we know the suspect has been linked to in real life will help narrow. Like if you were suspecting Adam Levine, ask if KS has ever been linked to Morgan Mayhem (ie Lindsay Lohan)."

And I love the Enrique Iglesias guess from Ado!! Anna K. certainly fits the long and lean descriptors.

c174ccde-32d7-11e0-b0de-000f20980440 said...

Yeah, not sure what's going with the commentor names showing up as random letters and numbers. Is anyone else having that issue or is it just me? It happened on another thread too. LOL!

The last comment was from me.

-KADixonLaw

Cathy said...

I don't think that asking about Morgan Mayhem would work, since Lindsay has also hung out with Leo (or followed around, whatever).

I'll ask if he knows Jackie Bouffant, since we pretty much know that's Zac and he's hung out with Leo.

In my mind, the main contenders are Leo and Adam Levine, so let's see what Ted says!

Cecilia00 said...

Ted has eliminated Clooney in todays Bitch-Back.

Cathy said...

I just emailed him, so hopefully he'll answer. Just to let you guys know, I got a white screen when I was using Chrome, but it worked when I used Internet Explorer. So maybe it just doesn't work with all browsers?

Caz1310 said...

Oh please don't let it be Enrique! Thought he and Anna were in a solid relationship. A lot of ladies would like a chance at him though. Wouldn't JT's voice for Boo Boo in Yogi Bear movie count him out for this one? His personality and attitude certainly fits although yes he does seem to be Jerry Rock Butt.

Jamee said...

Tara! I've been busy and really not on here much recently. And let's be honest, it got kind of unfun last time around. Calling people b-tches and wh-res takes the fun out 99% of the time me thinks.

I want this to be Adam Levine, but I thought he already was a vice? He's with that Victoria's Secret model now and makes it seem like it's serious, but since M5 busted on the scene he's been known as a dirty, dirty dog, cheating, sleeping around. Once a dog, always a dog? He has the same attitude as Clooney and, in my opinion, he SO has the "I'm hot and I know it" to back it up. If you saw the practically nude photo he did for some cancer organization about a month back, then you know what I mean. (If you haven't, you're truly doing your lady quiver a disservice...I mean, wow. No words.)

Kristen said...

As I'm becoming more and more convinced that this is NOT Leo, I'm also becoming more and more convinced that Ted wants us to think that it is.

Tara said...

Word, Jamee that was not fun. I disappeared for a few days too. Keeping it real is one thing but being harshly personal is quite another! I saw the pic you are, erm, talking about;) Laughing my arse off at your description, BTW. But does Levine love being in front of the camera more than on stage? I really don't know the answer--except that he gives good face in his music vids.

Cathy, I totally forgot about Leo and Lindsay, though I thought I recalled she was more of a stalker as opposed to a friend/hook up? And as we all know, Leo just had that night out with Chace Crawford and who else? So Crescent & King--do they hang?

@Ado, wasn't Leto eliminated VIA BB recently?

Also, we haven't really explored the most recent BB clue about KS possibly catching some flack for "stealing another man's lady" or whatevs. Or did I read into something?

Guesswho said...

This does sound a lot like Timberlake. Boring girlfriend. Seems more interested in acting. All his GFs and rumored jump-offs are famous. Also, wasn't he touted as the next King of Pop at one time? He also played the future king in one of the Shrek movies (although that was voiceover work so does that rule him out?).

I liked the Enrique guess but Ted says King is more into the big screen and I don't recall Enrique doing much movies. He seems more music focused.

In one of Ted's replies he says that King stole his babe from another guy. This might be a way to narrow it down.

Ado said...

Oh darn.. I missed the "into the big screen"-thing.. My bad!!!

OK, I tried to google who could be the chick LEO stole from another guy, and checked under whosdatedwho.com, but noone rang a bell..

.. however, what is interesting: Leo dated Anne Vyalitsyna, who is currently Adam Levine's girlfriend.. :))

This is really one frigging degree of separation in h'wood..:))

Cathy said...

Super-bummed Ted didn't answer my question today. I wonder if it might have been a little too on-the-nose? In addition to asking if KS has ever hung out with Jackie Bouffant, I couldn't resist the urge to mention that my pup has one blue eye and one brown - and asked what Nelly Fang would think of that (since Kate Bosworth is known for that).

Adrienne said...

Hey there,

The puppy sniffer question was mine. I wanted to see if he would eliminate Leo altogether or on the flip side eliminate people whose main talent isn't acting. Of course, I am now more confused than ever. It seems to eliminate people whose main gig in music, though his "rocked them both" makes me think there could be some music/rock/at least theater influence.
As for the part about if he was ever caught with someone else, I was referring to Eva Herzigova- a model he was reported to have had an affair with while she was married:
http://www.nndb.com/people/581/000023512/
AS for hanging out with crescent, the People article I referred to much earlier (see above post) does place them at least in the same social group. And yes, Lindsay Lohan was widely reported to have hung out with Leo a few times (see where I referenced her late night visits to his house in earlier posts as well) and she was rumored to be the last lady at some of his after hours parties.
So, now that this is clear as mud :), I still think Leo could be a possibility, though I have been looking at musicians turned successful actors too. Other than JT (who we think is Jerry Rock Butt), Walhberg (who seems unlikely as he is not a bachelor), and Diddy (Kim porter was a model- though I do not think Ted could honestly say KS likes em long and lean always for diddy, having dated j. lo). I didn't have much luck honing in on musicians gone actors. I am sticking with Leo for now for my guess.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong George Clooney?
—LM

Dear Men of a Certain Age:
George is a little too old to be Schlong'ing around, but you've nailed it in the attitude department.

Dear Ted:
On your Bitch-Back today, there was a question about Amy Adams and you answered she is boring as toast. On a different question about King Schlong you answered his gal is boring as toast. So, is King Schlong Darren DeGallo?
—K

Dear Det. Snoop:
K, what a little sneak you are! While you're wrong on this one, you certainly have a knack for my tactics. Keep trying, I have a feeling I'll get some right guesses out of you soon."

Stacey said...

I agree, every time he answers a question it just gets more confusing. Ado, I had thought of Enrique and Leto also because they seem to fit well. But I ruled out Enrique b/c Ted made it seem like he was American and I thought Enrique was foreign. And now the big screen comment from Ted doesn't help that guess. Jared would be great but like you said isn't in a high profile relationship.

On Leo, I did a google search and it looks like he was rumored to be signing up for a play in 2007 but that it never actually happened. Anyone know of anything else he did onstage?

As for Levine, how much has he been on the big screen? I didn't think he was much but I'm not sure.

And if not them, who the heck does that leave us with?????

Jamee said...

Hmm oops, I forgot the more on the big screen part, too. The only reason why I can't completely rule out Adam Levine is because Ted says KS "prefers" the big screen but has rocked a stage, too. I personally think Adam Levine would be a movie star if he had the option. He's so self-absorbed and vain and completely unapologetic about it. I need more clues! Either way, I reallyyyy don't think this is Leo.

Tara--Glad you enjoy the AL photo as much as I did. Hehe. I want my boyfriend to get those exact tattoos SO BADLY. :) They're so hot.

Caz1310 said...

Tara how on earth do you get Ted to answer so many questions as you do? Gotta say I'm totally confused now. Ted must be laughing his ass off at the kerfuffle this one's causing :)

LMS130 said...

Sure sounds like Jared Leto after today's BB. Adam Levine and Enrique Igleseas offically notted. Props to whoever asked that question!

Blackheart23 said...

Todays post has so much information. So King isn't a singer and has also starred in another BV. Since his girlfriend doesn't have a Bv I doubt he'd guest star as a boyfriend. I like Leto too, but would Ted really confirm Leto as a BV in the same post? And on a sidenote, Ted said all of the friends had a BV except Lisa. Didn't he say two months ago that Jennifer Aniston didn't?

Blackheart23 said...

Hmm I just realized it probably isn't Leto. Ted says King doesn't act and sing. Leto sings and sometimes acts.

Jamee said...

WHAT! That means Aniston has a BV now?! WHAT!?! Whoa. He has notted JA for a vice a bajillion times before.

Jamee said...

Blackheart--I really don't think Ted notted Schlong as a double threat (actor and singer). His reply was a non-answer, per usual. Def don't think Leto (or any other musician) is out. That's how I took it.

But the high profile relationship really doesn't fit Leto for this one...

Ado said...

@Blackheart23: I think Ted did not exactly notted the singing part.. hm?

Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong a double threat (as in actor and singer)?
—mookindahouse

Dear Pinch Yourself:
If so, he would have way too much going for him, no?


.. well, Ted asks back, so I would not say that he said no to the singing question.

And this may be a clue: girlfriend BORING AS TOAST:

.. in the current Bich-back Ted chose to answer a Justin Timberlake question:

Dear Ted:
Is Jessica Biel boring as toast? My pound purries are dying to know?
—Jillybean

Dear Still Snoring:
Yes, and it's pretty painfully boring. I mean she didn't even jet off to Dallas with BF Justin Timberlake for the Super Bowl. And people wonder why he keeps sneakily getting tied to Olivia Munn. She was at the same afterparty. Someone warn boring Biel, already!


AND: in 2 Bitch-backs before:

Dear Ted:
On your Bitch-Back today, there was a question about Amy Adams and you answered she is boring as toast. On a different question about King Schlong you answered his gal is boring as toast. So, is King Schlong Darren DeGallo?
—K

Dear Det. Snoop:
K, what a little sneak you are! While you're wrong on this one, you certainly have a knack for my tactics. Keep trying, I have a feeling I'll get some right guesses out of you soon.


?????? Is Ted teasing us..????

Blackheart23 said...

Yeah you guys are right, he didn't not it. Leto had previously been with Scarlett Johanson and Lindsay Lohan but nothing recently.

Jamee- I know right? So does that mean she recently got one?

I can't imagine himtelling us who it is. He keeps wanting us to think its Leo or Justin. I really don't think its Justin because of the recent post and because Justin is already thought to have a BV

Stacey said...

As for Leo, didn't he star in his own vice? Since KS hasn't he would be out too. Also the stage thing doesn't work well for him. BUT Leo is the only person Ted hasn't officially notted. Has anyone asked about him yet? I'm sure someone has.

I think we need some totally new guesses. So what do we actually know now? Correct or add:

He is most likely an American actor who's been on the big screen and the stage. He may have done a little singing. He seems pretty famous and is in a high profile relationship. He seems to hang out with mostly famous people and date models/actresses. His girlfriend is gorgeous but boring. He's charming, good looking in a "I'm know I'm the ish" kind of way. He likes to get himself on camera. He has not done voiceover work.

Anything else?

Adrienne said...

@ Blackheart and @jamee.... I caught that Aniston thing too!! WTH? Very interesting development.

As for Leo, the stage work I had found had more to do with Master of Cermonies type things at Earth Day type functions (not sure that this qualifies or disqualifies) and the rumored broadway production.

It seems that KS has at least appeared in someone else's BV. I did submit a question directly about Leo- let's hope he answers, though I've been about 1 for 3 lately on Ted replies.

Ado said...

@Stacey: KS
- travels (girfriend flaunted all over the world: concerts/movie premiers)
- bachelor-type
- age under Clooney

Jenna said...

I think he was pretty clear with notting the double threat (i.e. Justin) because he said pinch yourself...which of course means, wake up, you're dreaming...is Jared the only one left? Does he fit? I don't even know much about him...

Ashley said...

Hey I'm new to this blog. But I just wanted to let you guys know that I had asked Ted if Leo or Johnny had a blind vice a couple months before this blind came out and he said no for both. So maybe Leo's blind was an unnamed one and he didn't count it. That would make him eligible for this one.

Stacey said...

That's good Adrienne, I hope he answers! I just can't give up on this one for some reason.

So I'm going to throw out some random guesses. I haven't really checked them out but I'm sure you guys can help not them.

Did someone already mention Liev Schrieber? B/c he fits on some points. Stage and screen work, equally yummy counterpart that he's flaunted all over the world. I think he's more based in NY than LA though. He won't commit to marrying Naomi Watts, for the eternal bachelor thing...

Also to throw out there, Matthew McConaughey...Bradley Cooper I think already was a vice, right? John Krasinski? How bout guys in Leo's posse? Entourage guys, Glee guys? Um...

And did you guys see that Ashlee Simpson just filed for divorce from Pete Wetz. What about him? I don't think he's done much on the big screen though. Maybe they could fit for another blind?

Santi said...

Justin timberlake! Ted described his girlfriend "boring as toast" and then someone used the expression to ask if it was Amy Adam's husband as Ted has described her "boring as toast"
In today's blind vice, someone asked Ted if Jessica Biel was "boring as toast" and Ted said yes!

Jenna said...

That did seem like a sneaky way of making us think it is Justin, but just above he had said pinch yourself when someone asked if KS were both a singer and an actor, so it can't be him. I guess there are lots of girls who are boring as toast!

Tara said...

It is not Justin Timberlake. He is highly suspected to be Jerry Rock Butt and Ted has mentioned that Jessica co-stars in his BV, so that adds further fuel, not to mention his multiple BV confirmations by Ted in BBs long prior to this blind. Speaking of which, wouldn't be surprised to see a JRB/She Devil Dees (aka Olivia Munn) bv or mini pop up in the near future considering they were both spotted w/o Jess at a superbowl pre-event last weekend....

Leo is a gray area, we have pretty much come to that conclusion through this blind. Ted is like Fort Knox with Leo questions lately! We can't keep tossing other names into the ring that we know are confirmed BVs. If anyone here is new to the site, see the List of Ted's BV Reveals on the side intermixed w/all in the name directory on the right. @Stacey, I thought of Wentz as soon as I read that this AM. The only thing holding me back is he is "hot" only to a very specific demographic. Something to add to that argument though is that he owns a bar called "Angels & Kings", which has now expanded to several cities. Inneresting....


Caz, I have had a good streak, but I also rotate email addresses when I send him questions. That may help:)

Adrienne said...

I think it can not be Pete Wentz as he is not an "eternal bachelor" - married with children- and today Ted aludes to vicey behavior being more about "exposure" than anything. Lastly the biggest clue about KS seems to be that he is more into the big screen work- of which Wentz completely does not fit.
@ Stacey- Leiv is a very interesting guess. I will have to look at him more. The only thing about him is that I don't see him as the presence in a room that Ted describes KS to be- but of course that is just opinion, and very subjective. Also, I think Naomi Watts strikes me as lean, but not so long... I keep visualizing the GF that KS has been taking all over as model arm candy. Has Liev ever been married? I don;t know much about him.

Becki said...

It also cannot be Pete because he is not very good looking, at least not traditionally. And Ashlee is far from a beauty.

ef1bb85c-34a1-11e0-b87f-000f20980440 said...

Aaargh... This one is killing me!!! I have been poring through websites looking for H-wood actors that are in bands and actors who have dabbled in Broadway productions. Nothing seems to fit, though. I thought of an interesting multi-talented guy, Ryan Gosling, who is also supposed to be a really great DJ (could fit the rocking a stage clue), but I'm not aware of him dating anyone.

Just had to vent my frustration. ; )

-KADixonLaw

Tara said...

I tried to do that too, Kadix, and came up with Kris Kristofferson, Jeff Daniels, and Ludacris. Um, no.

Pete Wentz does not have a "big screen" career but he has a short small screen resume. Even if he doesn't really fit this, Ted has confirmed that at least one of the 2 in the broken couple has a BV today.

Eyes Wide Slut said...

russell brand

Stacey said...

Kadix, I am right there with you. This is driving me nuts. If we at least had a few good guesses, I'd feel better but it seems like every guess just doesn't fit for a few reasons.

I just wish I could believe it was Leo, because he fits SO much of the criteria. And Ted hasn't notted him! The only reasons he does not fit: already was a blind (debatable), he hasn't really rocked a stage, and he HAS done voiceover work. ARGH! I still don't know if he can be ruled out though.

On Leto, he's not in a high profile relationship. Russell Brand I know we all thought was Altar Ego Salami climber, plus Katy's not bland as toast.

Adrienne on Liev, I agree with you. He's really probably not a big enough star for this. I was trying to brainstorm, hoping to come up with something...every guess has something off.

Someone a long time ago mentioned John Hamm, and what about McConaughey? I guess I'll see if he's done anything on stage..

Kelly said...

@Tara... Kris Kristofferson and Ludacris?! That really made me LOL! Thanks for that! : )

@Stacey... Ah yes, McConaughey. I wonder if naked bongo playing counts as rocking a stage. Haha!!

-KADixonLaw

Ado said...

I second the opinions that P.WENTZ isn't KS - but he would actually make sense why Ted notted Joel MADDEN in the first place (which is bugging me: he is def no bachelor...)

I hope KS is not Liev SCHREIBER (I adore him..), although he would have connections w/ Joel Madden: 2 kids in both relationships..

Somehow I have a feeling that KS is connected to the rap-scene.. (does it make sense..? :(( )

Blackheart23 said...

Well its no Leto.

I think were missing something. The AIAs have to connect with King somehow..

Stacey said...

LOL! Kadix I wish. I can't find much stage evidence for him and IMDB says he has done voiceover work so I guess he's out.

Ado I had thought it seemed like a rapper too, from the wording. My original guess was Jay-Z and Beyonce. But now today Ted said that Jared Leto was a good match physically. So that means what, a white pretty boy?

My hubby suggested Chris Rock when I read it to him, but that doesn't fit b/c of the bachelor thing. But what about another comedian? I can't think of many pretty boy type comedians off the top of my head though.

And seriously if he doesn't eliminate Leo soon I'm just going to throw my hands up and say it's him despite his clues.

Stacey said...

Dear Ted:
Could Jared Leto be King Schlong? I just can think of the popular lady on his arm. He is rumored to be well equipped, a bit of a douche and would easily bed Hollywood party chicks.
—Beth

Dear King Wrong:
Sorry, nice try, though! (And certainly physically, that's for sure.)

Dear Ted:
Is King Schlong Robert Pattinson? Yes-or-no answer please.
—Tina

Just to add his comments. Blackheart, checking out the AIA's again is a good idea too!

Adrienne said...

Maybe we need to ask Ted a question that will elaborate on the former BV that he said KS guest starred in. Maybe it will shed a little light. I am trying to think of a good way to ask...

@Stacey- I know, this is so frustrating! I still do like Leo, though I have been seriously considering people in the comic realm like your husband is as well... I came up with Jamie Foxx on that one (though I know he is also a suspect for Saucy). The only thing is, do we ever see him taking someone out all over the world? Hmm, not that I can recall.

This BV is really keeping us and Ted busy! :)

Blackheart23 said...

I can't for the life of me figure out what Joel Madden, Kanye West, and Johnny Depp would all have in common with someone.

@Adrienne, that's a great idea. If we could figure out more about his guest starring role, then they would connect us with another BV, and maybe the person behind the name.

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