Friday, December 23, 2011

Blind Vice! Rockstar Reeks of Playboy Ways!

New from Ted today -

Blind Vice!  Rockstar Reeks of Playboy Ways!

You'd think that buckets of moolah, tons of adoring fans and a hot chick at your side would be enough.

Not so for Lesley Grotto, one of those swoon-worthy rock star types with the slick moves and killer abs. See, Les has all of that (including a knockout gal most dudes would kill to canoodle with) but—surprise! surprise!—he wants more, more, more.
Especially when it comes to chicks. ‘Cause let's be honest...
Lesley is a straight up dawg!
You wouldn't know it though because when he's around his "special" lady (especially when there are cameras around) Lesley is the image of a doting boyfriend—ya know, lovey dovey kisses and all the "awwww"-inducing crapola.
But when she's out of sight, she's definitely out of mind too.
Which leaves Lesley to do what he does best: sweet talking the panties off of any (and every) chick in sight.
"He's a total d-bag," one of the pretty party gals who attended one of the many booze-soaked event that Grotto frequents bitched to us. "He's all over chicks at these parties and flirts with everyone."
Continues our blabbermouth babe: "But as soon as he's with his woman he's a whole different man, all committed and monogamous."
Sounds smarmy. Well, actually, that totally sounds like half the other dudes in Tinseltown.
Here's the real Q though: If his lady found out would be really even care? We kinda think not.
AND IT AIN'T: Jason Mraz, Kanye West, Bruno Mars

Top suspect: Adam Levine


blurry vice said...

Adam Levine or Michael Buble?

Unknown said...

Adam Levine

Sue T. said...

Adam is dating Victoria's Secret model Anne Vyalitsyna, in case anyone is curious.

blurry vice said...

125 - yes I know. I do think it is him. Ted had said in the past he was not a BV yet before this, even though I thought he was one of the old ones. This one sounds like him. Naming him top suspect for now.

Rita said...

If he weren't already confirmed to be a blind vice star, and if it said wife, this SOOOO would be Russell Brand!

But yeah, count me in on the Adam Levine bandwagon.

Rita said...

And it would funny if it were Justin Bieber - extremely funny! But he too is confirmed to be a vice star.

Tyler said...

The answer to this came so naturally, it almost seems like Ted used it to compensate for the challenges posed by that Brucey Huskers blind.

Adam Levine

Merry Christmas everyone!

Flora Mukavec said...

"slick moves" reminds me of "Moves like Jaggar". Agree with Levine. I'm a new poster, longtime lurker. :)

steph148 said...

Not even two sentences in, and this just screamed Adam Levine.

Anonymous said...

and of course one of the awwing moments include that kiss during the VS fashion show... & it was SO cute, sad to hear he is a horndog!

medusa said...

Rita, but is Russell Brand a "rockstar"? He's played ones in the movies, but as far as I know is primarily an actor/comedian.

The second to last sentence, "If his lady found out would be even care?" is confusing because of the typo. Is it supposed to be would HE even care? or would SHE even care? The first one implies he's even more of a cad, without any feelings for whatever woman he's publicly with. But if it's SHE, well, then maybe it's a consensual open relationship, and she really doesn't care as long as he comes home to her. Maybe she does the same, only isn't as famous so nobody is calling gossip columnists about her.

I know it seems silly to be harping on the difference, but in my opinion, if he and his girlfriend are okay with it, what's the problem? It's not like the girls he flirts with don't know he's in a relationship.

Rita said...

@medusa - Ted said "rock star type". Russell fits. But I hope you read my comment in its entirety understanding that I was joking.

Rita said...

BTW, Anyone reading those "99 Reasons to love Hollywood" on the AT?

Wonder if there are hidden reveals, and crap, I think Ted will not be posting any Mail until at least Jan. 2nd. Shit.

pikespeak said...

Wow, THIS is a blind?

I know 12 year olds who are more "vicey" than this.

Ted, of course Anna wouldn't care...he's flirting, he's not gangbanging these chicks.

He's always been a douche, too.

PrincessTiff said...

*sigh* I hope it's Adam Levine because that means no matter what his relationship status is, I still have a chance! Lol.

PrincessTiff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
lns212 said...

i kind of don't think it's adam. i feel like aside from the vs fashion show, and a few photos from this week, you don't really see him and anne together for the photogs. it seems to me like it's someone who acts a little more like selena & justin

medusa said...

@Rita, yes, it says "Rockstar type" in the body, but the headline still says "Rockstar" which to me means that it is an actual musician. Maybe I'm giving Ted too much credit for being accurate in his word choice...

bookworm said...

Another bloghad a similar story the popular guess was Micheal Buble but I think this is Robin Thicke.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
What's up with Adam Levine and his new girlfriend? The man is known for playing the field hard and bedding some of the most enviable women in show biz—all without the need for any type of commitment. And all of a sudden he has a "steady girlfriend"? That does not make sense to me. People do not change overnight

and I do not think he had any life changing experiences recently to make him want to change his playboy ways. What gives?

Dear Hot Enough to Settle:
Well, the dude is dating a Victoria's Secret model, so perhaps he's found his motivation to settle down? But then again, I wouldn't expect it to last—players in H'wood are tough dudes to tame."

blurry vice said...

Well now we have verification Adam is now a BV. On Feb 9 2011 it was a NO. Now on Feb 18 2012 it is a YES.

"Feb 18

Dear Ted:
What can you tell me about Adam Levine? Other than his adorable smile, is he as bad as women say? Is he a Blind Vice?

Dear Yes:
And bad has never looked so good."

Now, if only our reader "The Spie" was still here, he could do the timeline thing to verify which possible BVs fit as Adam's, possibly exposing Adam as this one. If anyone has time, please do! :)

blurry vice said...

lesley grotto

"Dear Ted:
What's up with Lesley Grotto lately? Did his GF wise up to his bad boy ways?

Dear Less of Lesley:
Les' gal has wised up to his ways a bit, but she's still far from discovering the real bad boy behind Lesley's straight-edge persona. L.G. is excellent at
maintaining a squeaky clean image."

blurry vice said...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
What's up with Adam Levine? I can't believe he called Jennifer Love Hewitt "aggressive." What century is he living in? Is he a Vicer? If so, is his holier-
than-thou attitude what got him into the B.V. column?

Dear Massaging the Truth:
You have to read more than the headline, mama! That's how news gets twisted. Because while Adam did call J.Love's flirting "aggressive," he also said how
lucky he was that a "beautiful woman" was making public passes at him. As for his Vice moniker, it's not really 'tude-related.

Dear Ted:
Okay, I love The Voice mainly just to watch Adam Levine and Blake Shelton. We all know Adam dabbles in Vice-like behavior, but what about Blake? Is he
working towards his own B.V.?

Dear Blind Bromance:
Blake certainly has a few secrets hidden in that cowboy hat of his, but he hasn't made as splashy a presence in the world of Vices as Adam has. The twosome
has totally different Vicey styles, though."

blurry vice said...

Can I just say for the record how much I can not stand Adam Levine? He is very full of himself. I can not stand to watch his show where he sits in his chair and acts like an a-hole. Also, why does Ted refer to him as a "rockstar"? He is from a boy-band type group. I really would not call Maroon 5 "rock".
He's not attractive, he looks like the average dork you would find at a bar picking up chicks. Snooze, get over yourself.

There I have said my piece.

blurry vice said...



"Dear Ted:
I'm willing to bet that there is more than one woman out there hurt by Adam Levine who does not think he just loves all women. Takes more than just rolling around naked to love women, Adam; how about a little respect too? Sorry, Ted…that was more of a rant than a question.

Dear Men Are From Mars:
I hate to assume, but is this Anne V?! Either way, I think Adam's heart is more or less in the right spot; sometimes he just thinks with the wrong head. But a playboy can change his stripes eventually, right?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Could you tell me more about Adam Levine's Vice? I'm a huge fan of his! Is it something that would make me not like him as much? Love your column!

Dear Harder to Vice:
It depends on what kind of Vice turns you off, babe! Adam's BV is a little more vanilla, but I wouldn't say it will make you swoon. The "Payphone" singer certainly has that bad-boy swag."