One Sex, Booze and Brawling Blind Vice

New from Ted today -

One Sex, Booze and Brawling Blind Vice

Finally! Somebody's actually having some heterosexual sex in Hollywood—love it! But it was some messy nooky, I'll tell ya that much: Myra MySpace and Booby Butt-Wipe, who actually used to date each other in real life, recently filmed a project together. A hotel downtown acted as the shoot's somewhat cheesy location, and filming was just planned for the day in a slightly seedy suite.

Scene being filmed? Two girls fighting over one kinda hot dude. It was supposed to be all low-energy Penthouse pseudo-sex, but what ended up happening was Hustler-style screwing in the bedroom, between shots, and some WWE-worthy battling between the two gals while filming!

Here's what went down, as it were:

Myra, who considers herself a real Tila Tequila model of sexual media energy, what with her impressive online following, did not like it when she discovered that the other girl chosen for the job was an actual porn star. No good, snipped Myra. Booby, who just wanted to get it on with whomever he could (kinda like how he is all the time, both when filming his tragic reality show, and not), didn't care.

He's the one getting serviced in the scene, what's it to him?

So Myra , in order to soothe her insulted feelings that her higher art of nonporn existence was being tarnished, picked up the nearby bottle of Jack Daniels, which was a prop, mind you. Nevertheless, Myra guzzled the whole damn thing and then started taking Booby, who was wearing boxer shorts with nothing underneath, into the nearby bedroom for extended breaks, at the end of which Butt-Wipe would reenter the suite's living area, somewhat glazed, his shorts tenting out to West Hollywood, practically.

But then Myra got so boozed up, she started fighting and clawing with the porn star—for real, on camera—and hitting the production assistant who took the whiskey away from the drunken broad. Jeez! Sounds so much more fun to shoot instead of the soft-porn-style scene the threesome was supposed to do!

Oh, and if you're Booby's famous, current TV girlfriend, pretend you didn't read this.

And it ain't: Brody Jenner & Audrina Patridge, Lauren Conrad & Stephen Colletti, Zak Penley & Kenley Collins

Update May 31 - Ted eliminated Bret Michaels.