Friday, February 6, 2009

One No-Shame Same-Sex Blind Vice

New blind vice from Ted Casablanca today...


One No-Shame Same-Sex Blind Vice
This baby's sure to break a lotta hearts out there. Now, it's certainly not news that Nevis Divine is undeniably sexy. He's got a steady following from fans and paparazzi to a bevy of nearly naked gals, all vying for a piece of luscious Nev's sorta hairy frame.
Robert Pattinson Movie (Smile, Red) Poster Print - 22x34But as so often is the case with the hugely slobbered set, Nevis doesn't always look to the chicks to ignite his fire. In fact, we very nearly could have a potential Toothy Tile on our hands, 'cause just like old beloved Tooth, boy Divine was once as carefree with his attraction to guys as he now is with the fairer sex:
Nevis has been famous for a while now, but his white-hot infamy's only recently been building. And we just learned that only a couple of years ago, N.D. showed up to a very prominent Industry function, and as his date, brought along another man. Love this dude's nerve! As N.D. introduced his non-famous plus one, Nevis-babe was sure to label his companion a boyfriend, while the two were nonchalantly "couply" all evening, say those who hang with Mr. D now as they did then.
And no, we're most decidedly not saying this was a boy-date who was simply a friend, but a friend with nooky benefits, for sure. Pals close to our semicloseted heartthrob claim that N.D. would "fool around" with guys sometimes, but that he considered it "no big deal."
Which is ironic because, really, it isn't. At least, not until one of those fooler-arounders heads to the nearest checkbook-dispensing tabloid office.
And it ain't: Robert Buckley, Corbin Bleu, Penn Badgley

* List of eliminated as of 2/11/12 - Robert Buckley, Corbin Bleu, Penn Badgley, John Mayer, Daniel Radcliffe, Zac Efron, Shia LeBeouf, Justin Bartha, Bradley Cooper, Simon Baker, Kevin Connolly, Matt Dallas, Dwayne Johnson, Gerard Butler, Kellan Lutz, Chace Crawford, Hugh Jackman, Viggo Mortensen, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Ed Westwick, Emile Hirsch, Alexander Skarsgard, Hugh Grant, Diego Luna, James Franco, Tom Sturridge, Ben Barnes, George Clooney, Jake Gyllenhaal, Will Smith, Jim Sturgess, James McAvoy, Stephen Moyer, Ryan Kwanten, Ryan Reynolds, Edward Norton, David Boreanaz, Sebastian Stan, Olivier Martinez, Michael Cera, Eric Bana, Hayden Christensen, Mike Myers, Alex O'Loughlin, Keanu Reeves, Joshua Jackson, Hugh Jackman, Channing Tatum, Colin Farrell, Austin Nichols, Rodrigo Santoro, Ryan Gosling, Jude Law, Daniel Radcliffe, Austin Nichols, Paul Wesley, Ed Westwick, Chris Evans, Robert Downey Jr, Adrian Grenier, Channing Tatum, Jeremy Renner, Anton Yelchin, Charlie Sheen, Wentworth Miller, Cam Gigandet, Adam Lambert, Russell Brand, John Goodman, Henry Cavill, Orlando Bloom, Dominic Monaghan, Paul Rudd, Ryan Phillippe, Adrian Grenier, Patrick Dempsey, Josh Brolin.


* Our top suspect: Robert Pattinson


* Please use the label below for a link to all of the newer Nevis BVs.


* Proven by timeline of Ted's dates he was and wasn't a BV: Nevis Divine is Robert Pattinson.

162 comments:

Kristina said...

I believe this is about that guy from twilight Robert Pattinson. Have heard rumblings from hollywood sources he swings both ways and might be closeted. Explains why Camillia Belle was just a "friend". He has been on the scene for a while even though he only recently attained hearthrob status among the tween set.

Nancy said...

N.D. could very well be Young ND-ana Jones - Shia LeBeouf. When was the last time he was romantically linked?

Dayna said...

james franco

lorelie8 said...

I agree Dayna. James Franco fits.

lorelie8 said...

I agree Dayna. James Franco fits.

Anna said...

But then James Franco is already Crotch Uh-Lastic.

Mandy said...

I don't think James Franco is "sorta hairy" either... isn't he smooth-chested?

Anna said...

Me thinks this could be Adrian Grenier. He's the only hairy one I could think of at the moment!!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I thought your website problems were supposed to be resolved by the end of January? It's so slow! BTW, is Nevis Divine John Mayer?
—Anonymous in Dallas

Dear Mayorizing:
I know too much about Mr. Mayer to find him "undeniably sexy," as I do the real Nevis. And all our bugs will be fixed before Nev outs himself loud 'n' proud, thanks for sticking by."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Daniel Radcliffe?
—Visitor

Dear Homo Potter:
Sorry, sweets, ain't him. If any fey fellas wanna see Danny's privates, they can buy a ticket to Equus. Nevis is slightly harder to uncover."

Tits and Ass said...

It could be Robert Pattinson, think about it:
-crazy Twihards
-was sorta famous from Harry Potter
-has a hairy chest

Gin said...

Oh my god! Sorry, off topic but just saw this

Dear Ted:
What's the deal with Lance Armstrong and his baby on the way? The guy gets around. Is he as happy as he is saying?
—Earno
Dear Trick or Treat:
The guy has a revolving door of suitors. Would that make you happy?

SUITORS... isn't that specifically a term used for males? Did Ted out Lance Armstrong?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Does Nevis Divine have famous siblings and have a movie coming out soon?
—BMB

Dear Watering for Divine:
Define soon."

duffgrl said...

"Suitor" is NOT specifically used for males only. Don't think he is outing lance by using that word.

lupinsmoon12391 said...

I didn't think Robert Pattinson was particularly quiet about his bisexuality...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I was just watching HSM3 and my gaydar was off the charts when it came to Zac Efron. Any chance he's Toothy Tile or Nevis Devine?
—I

Dear Homofron:
Zac's too young to be Toothy. Fab guess on Nevis though, but wrong guy. Think less dimply."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I know you keep insinuating that Rob Pattinson is bi/gay. But to be honest, I think that's you just trying to throw us off or something. Is Nevis Devine from One No-Shame Same-Sex Blind Vice Shia LaBeouf?
—Ashley

Dear So Sure:
Shia has more out-there vices than cavorting around with secret boyfriends."

Nikki said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Devine Justin Bartha or Bradley Cooper? Both of them scream formerly uncloseted, now closeted, gay to me.
— Tyler

Dear Screaming Mad:
Neither are Nevis! You’re getting very warm, though. So warm I’m mushy just tellin’ ya about it!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Simon Baker? If not, has he ever been a subject of any of your blinds?
—Michael, South Carolina

Dear Breaking Baker:
Nevis is a tad younger than Simon. As for Si's other dirty indiscretions? They're safe from me...for now."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
One No-Shame Same-Sex Blind Vice: I'd like to clear Robert Pattinson's good name. Is it Kevin Connolly?
—Coraline

Dear Not Clearing Kev:
Wrong Vice for Connolly, so sorry! His is a diff one."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
It's not that I'm dying to know who Nevis Divine is, what's killing me is the silence on your part as to who he is not. And in some odd and inexplicably psychotic way, I very badly want to protect Robert Pattinson's good name. So I'm asking again: Is Nevis Kevin Connolly? I was already embarrassed finding myself emailing the first time...must I do it again?
—Coraline

Dear Persistence:
Like I said, One No-Shame Same-Sex is the wrong Vice for Kev. Feel free to try again, babe!"

yohello said...

I don't think it could be Robert Pattinson. Ted said "Nevis is a tad younger than Simon." Robert is almost 20 years younger than Simon. I'd say 20 years is harldy "a tad".

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
OK, so I think maybe I actually figured this out. Schlong Sleaze-Wad is Ben Affleck and Nevis Divine is Matt Dallas. Also, Ted, beautiful Ted, I love you! I'm gay, 28, 6-foot and Italian. Need a pool boy?
—Scornedsunshine

Dear Ciao Bella:
No on Ben, no on Matt (close, though), and sorry, sweetie, no on the last offer, the Casablanca casa doesn't come with a pool. Do ya know how to program TiVo, though?"

chrissi said...

possibly Zac Efron or break my heart with Simon Baker??

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Your Nevis Devine is possibly the infamous Dwayne Johnson. It seems to fit. What do you think?
—Pearl

Dear Foul Smell:
I think you're in the wrong age group, dear. But right...eagerness. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Just wondering if Nevis Divine and Crotch Uh-Lastic have been in a film together? If yes, has it been in a film released in the past two years?
—BMB

Dear Movie Muff:
Not that I'm aware of, but if they had, Crotch would have had to have held back his excitement I'm sure."

poster_child said...

Taylor Kitsch from Friday Night Lights and now X-Men fame.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You keep alluding to the idea that Rob Pattinson has such a racy history. How could he—he's only 22! However, that causes me to ask you the same question about Rob that I asked a number of months back: Has Rob been a Blind Vice?
—Janie, Chicago

Dear Young Rebel:
Ever heard of Drew Barrymore? Babe was getting drunk and high before she could drive. Quite possible, hon. And the answer to your last query is affirmative."

guidedog said...

Nevis Devine?

Hello Scotland calling!

Slightly younger than Simon Baker/ b-day: July 30 1969

Hmmm

Gerard Butler/ B-day: November 13 1969

That's slightly younger.

And for those of you who are geographically challenged Nevis is a mountain range in the Highlands of Scotland.

DUH!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I read on Megan Fox's MySpace today that Robert Pattinson is in a relationship with a close friend of hers. I haven't read anything...what's your thoughts?
—Amie

Dear Pattinson's Paramour:
You'll be reading all about Pattinson's conquests soon enough.

Dear Ted:
I'm a fan of Ashley Greene and Jackson Rathbone, and after reading your last Blind Vice I was wondering if you were talking about them. Are they a couple? Please give me a straight answer on this one.
—luisshi99

Dear Talkin' Twilight:
Not a couple. Close tho, babe!

Dear Ted:
Love your style, Ted! I pay very close attention to your blolumn, and I think I have most of your Vices figured out. I have a little confusion on Nevis Devine. Does his first name start with a T, and do we spend our Friday nights watching him on the boob tube?
—Kendra, Kalamazoo

Dear Way Off:
Jeez, even luissh, above is closer, and she wasn't even asking about the dude!"

Jackie said...

Dear Ted:
Is One Franchise Fagola Rob Pattinson? Come on, we know you want to tell us.
—Etrockstad

Dear Wrong Franchise:
And wrong B.V. for Pattinson, babe.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I just can't shake the Blind Vice about Nevis Divine. It just seems too obvious as Nevis is a mountain range in Scotland. Also, he is supposedly "slightly younger" than Simon Baker whose B-day is in July of 1969. Gerard Butler is Scottish, born in November of 1969 and seems less socially awkward with men than women. Am I hot or cold on this?
—Dixiematlack

Dear Det. Kilt:
Slightly deranged would be my assessment."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I love your site, it never fails to brighten my day. Please will you tell me whether Emile Hirsch is our beloved Toothy Tile, and Kellan Lutz is Nevis Devine?
—J

Dear Too Suspicious:
Something rub you the wrong way 'bout those two babes? Close, physically (but not at all emotionally) on the first, and just completely way off—in every regard—on the latter. Nevis isn't exactly hugely hump-worthy on sight, like Kellan."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Nevis Devine has got to be Chace Crawford.
—Orchidscent

Dear Innocent Chase:
This B.V. isn't C.C. He wishes he had this guy's talent. "

Hermes said...

Nevis is Robert Pattinson. Pattinson's boy friend is Tom Sturridge. They've been going together for over 2 yrs now. I think they even live together.
Care to comment on that one ted?

singlemg said...

Nevis Divine is Orlando Bloom. Ted says Nevis has a sort of hairy frame. Orlando wears a wig in his new movie - "Sympathy for Delicious." Nevis is in the Caribbean. Orlando was in Pirates of the Caribbean. Divine is godly or from God. The DJ in Sympathy for Delicious has the "divine" gift of healing. The AIA Corbin Bleu works for Disney and Bleu sounds akin to Bloom. Pirates was a Disney movie. Ted said the Justin Bartha guess made him all mushy. Justin Bartha went to Bloomfield High School. Miranda Kerr is a beard - this photo op is obviously staged and they aren't even doing a good job of faking it. Look at all the pictures here: http://tinyurl.com/cemqvq Finally, I emailed Ted and asked him if Orlando Bloom has ever been the subject of a blind, and he emailed me back and said "of course!" I think if y'all look closely you may discover some additional clues Ted has given.

I feel kind of dirty since I figured it all out. I wish Orlando nothing but the best.

Michael
South Carolina

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I've been thinking long and hard on this: Nevis Divine is Hugh Jackman right?
—Mcbader

Dear Not Exactly:
Nevis runs in the younger crowd."

charlotte said...

Dear Ted:
Robert Pattinson is going to be 23 this month! Have you decided what you're going to get him for his birthday? How about giving him (and his publicist) an early present and confirming that Rob is not Nevis Divine.
—Imqaatdbru

Dear Birthday Boy:
That would be far too big a gift, even for my fave Robbie, don't you think?

Clearly Rob!

In regards to Orlando i wudnt exactly say hes white hotnow or recently maybe a couple of years ago

blurry vice said...

Yep - basically outing Rob P for this!

"Dear Ted:
Robert Pattinson is going to be 23 this month! Have you decided what you're going to get him for his birthday? How about giving him (and his publicist) an early present and confirming that Rob is not Nevis Divine.
—Imqaatdbru

Dear Birthday Boy:
That would be far too big a gift, even for my fave Robbie, don't you think?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Just love your articles! I so trust your Bitch-Backs and Blind Vices, and not just the ones I choose to believe. Yes, I too am a Robsten fan. Since I believe in all your articles, is it safe to say that Rob is not a man whore but someone who plays both ways?
—Twi Mom

Dear Come Again?
Both ways meaning for the cameras and his heart? Not quite sure what you're driving at."

lulu said...

Dear blurry vice,
If Ted believed that Nevis Devine was RP, why is he insisting that Robsten should come out of the dating closet?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Orlando Bloom? It definitely looks like that chick he is with is a beard! Process of elimination.
—ponder.this

Dear Not Bloom:
You haven't eliminated every hunk just yet, deary!"

blurry vice said...

may 8

"Dear Ted:
Is Viggo Mortensen Nevis Divine?
—anonymous

Dear Good One:
No, but fantastic guess. Think younger, different nationality."

blurry vice said...

Lulu -

I think it's clear that Nevis is bi or just tested the waters. This instance where he brought the date, was in the past. We aren't sure who Nevis is dating right now, man or woman. Right? Maybe I am reading it differently.

anony-2 said...

May 19

Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Devine also know as Jonathan Rhys Meyers? He totally fits the description!
—CSutherland

Dear Divinely Devine:
Not totally, he doesn't! Right on almost everything else.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Devine also know as Jonathan Rhys Meyers? He totally fits the description!
—CSutherland

Dear Divinely Devine:
Not totally, he doesn't! Right on almost everything else."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I miss all of your Nevis Devine talk. Is Nevis still confused or has he finally made a decision to stick with the fairer sex (girls)? Eagerly waiting.
—Ponder This

Dear Don't Understand:
Why must people who like to have sex with both men and women get constantly referred to as "confused"? Can't he just be a natural-born horndog!?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Someone seems to think that Ed Westwick is Nevis Devine. Can you confirm or deny this silly rumor?
—Need to Know

Dear Gossip Girl:
Very close. But we haven't written about Ed's vice. Yet."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
All you talk about is Twilight, Robsten, Robert Pattinson. Come on, tell us more about Nevis Devine. I miss him!
—Cibele

Dear Bringing Back Bi:
I'm sure you don't miss him as much as you think you do.

Dear Ted:
Has Robert Pattinson ever been a victim of your Blind Vice?
—Am

Dearing Damning Det:
Not sure I like your usage of the term "victim." It's a damn honor to be a Blind Vicer!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Megan Fox and Robert Pattinson? Ted, out of respect for Kristen Stewart, can you please straighten this out? Also, you know how the meanies love to call Rob a man-whore at any opportunity. Hasn't Robsten been through enough? I thought you were going to help them without putting potholes in the road.
—JD

Dear Road Bump:
What, you think Rob and Kristen don't have pasts?

Dear Ted:
I love your site. Can you please tell me if Rob is bisexual?
—NGuyenkim

Dear Rob Lover:
Would that change how you feel about him?"

wanabRPsmom said...

yikes! is RP really the bi Nevis...?
according to Ted's reply about KS new hairdo.
"Robert likes a boyish look."

Oui said...

Ted notted RP as Nevis today. In today's Bitch-Back, Ted says that Nevis has never worked with Reese Witherspoon. Rob and Reese worked on Vanity Fair together; therefore, Rob is not Nevis Devine.

thomasonclan said...

be Nevis as he worked with Reese Witherspoon in Vanity Fair...he played her son in a cut scene that lasted a good 7 to 9 minutes. Can someone with this column confirm this with Ted?? The question came in and was answered today in his column

thomasonclan said...

Sorry...my comment was cut off...Rob Pattinson CANNOT be Nevis as he worked with Reese Witherspoon in Vanity Fair...he played her son in a cut scene that lasted a good 7 to 9 minutes. Can someone with this column confirm this with Ted?? The question came in and was answered today in his column

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has Reese Witherspoon ever worked with Nevis Devine?
—Jennifer

Dear Reese-spicous:
Nope. She has worked with other Blind Vice subjects...and been one herself!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I am stumped with Nevis Devine. Can you give us another clue, please?
—Curious II

Dear Hunting Nevis:
He has a great coif."

blurry vice said...

I won't mark Rob as eliminated as NEvis until Ted says that clearly. Ted is known to not get facts straight. According to IMDB yes they were both in Vanity Fair but for Rob, the role is listed as "uncredited". And to the person above - you said the scene was cut out of the movie? I wouldn't be so sure Ted even realizes they were technically in that movie together.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You sneaky devil! I started reading your column out of boredom at work, and now I'm hooked on Nevis Divine and Twi gossip. Love it! What's the problem with this? Well, I'm a 44-year old (mostly) lesbian mother to two teenagers, and now you've got me all in a lather over hot bi guys half my age! I've got to know: Has Nevis Divine ever been to rehab?
—Queer Cougar

Dear Queer Cougar (Love It):
Not unless he's kept it superduper quiet! Which he does most things, but rehab is not one, I'm fairly certain. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Emile Hirsch? Please tell us, Ted!
—AMJ

Dear Speed Racer:
No, but amazingly fab and close guess. "

Shamá said...

Hey, what about Ben Barnes?!

cibele said...

Since it was a cut scene, I don't think Ted knows they worked together. Everything points out to RP. I wrote tons of mails to Ted asking if Nevis is RP and guess what? He never answered. This means he can't answer.

Paulita said...

i think Nevis Divine is no other than Stephen Moyer. They have similarities with Robert pattinson. So if ted hints that ND is robert, there's a possibility too that ted is actually hinting Stephen Moyer. For those who doesn't know him, he's the lead actor in True Blood in HBO

nellyb said...

Ben Barnes and Tom Sturridge have been eliminated on 07/08/09 B*tch Back!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Already sent my guess on Toothy Tile, now it's Nevis Divine's turn. He has to be James Franco. I don't know why, but I feel so sure (on both guesses).
—Wanda

Dear Let's Be Franco:
J.F. has his own vices to worry about. He's just as delicious as Nevis, tho!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
How about a twofer? Please? Is Nevis Divine Tom Sturridge? If not, is he Ben Barnes? Am I close?
—imqaatdbru

Dear Double Trouble:
No to both, and no, you are not close."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Hugh Grant?
—Lovely Libra

Dear "Almost," but Not Quite:
Wrong age group, darling. Also wrong style, mannerisms, 'tude, like, everything!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Diego Luna?
—Isa2des

Dear Divine Intervention:
Right idea, wrong out of this country stud. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Love you to pieces! I'll get right down to it: Rob Pattinson. Everyone makes a big deal out of him and Kristen sharing shades and shirts. There have been lots of pics that prove he and his "best friend" Tom Sturridge share clothes, too.
—Jules

Dear Wink-Wink:
And your point is?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has Robert Pattinson been blessed to be a Blind Vice more than once?
—Sally

Dear Technicality:
He's starred in one and guest starred in another—so I guess you could say he has. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Love your column, Ted, and not a day goes by that I don't stop by multiple times! I'm still stuck on the identity of Nevis Divine. Is he the oh-so-gorgeous Alexander Skarsgård?
—Jill

Dear Blind Vice Bloodsucker:
You and many people are, darling! Nevis is not what he seems to be; read the clues carefully. And that's a no on A.S., but close. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
So handsome, so sexy, so stinky (now that you've started smoking again). You've noted Bradley Cooper, Justin Bartha, Orlando Bloom and Shia LaBeouf as the divine one. Coincidentally, all four of these strapping young men are in the movie New York, I Love You... Can you just go ahead and confirm at this point that Nevis is not in this movie, even if he has been romantically linked with someone in this movie?
—Imqaatdbru

Dear Nevis, I Love You:
Where would the fun be in that be, honey? But I'll give you something else, instead: The real Nevis Divine sometimes has to use makeup on his bod parts to appear even more real. Get it?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Jim Sturgess or James McAvoy? A clue, a hint or an outright denial?
—Jandlinn

Dear British Wish:
James McAvoy is a fab guess, but no on both of those. Think less obviously humpy. "

thomasonclan said...

I thought Nevis was RPattz too until Ted said a couple of things including make the comment SEVERAL times that Nevis is not immediately humpy or hump worthy. Well, we all know Ted thinks Rob hangs the moon. Also, Rob was in a 9 minute cut scene in Vanity Fair with Reese Witherspoon and Ted said Nevis was not in a movie w/ Reese....also, Ted has NOT made a single comment to any of the questions or comments we've made to his post/blog asking him about this inconsistency.

thomasonclan said...

I keep wavering back and forth on is it or isn't it Rob. Many things Ted says leads me to believe it is him, but some things don't add up either...frustrating.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I enjoy reading your column although the hA.T.ers have been unleashed lA.T.ely and often I get really pissed reading all the stupidities they said. I really appreciA.T.e if you could answer me if Nevis Divine is from England or Australia?
–LA.T.ina

Dear Divine Digging:
WhA.T. makes you think ND's Continental accent is from one of those places?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I'm a fairly new reader of A.T. and love thA.T. you not only deliver the juiciest gossip, but also share bits of your personal life (the beautiful tribute to Butch ) and political views (Prop 8). I am dying to figure out the identity of Nevis Divine and hope you will answer this question: Besides his acting skills, is Nevis also known to be musically talented?
—Ange

Dear Divinely Goods:
He is, but thA.T.'s not whA.T. he's known for."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Just wondering if Nevis Divine is none other than Stephen Moyer? Or perhaps Zac Efron, who admits using makeup both onscreen and off? Hope you'll confirm if either is N.D.
–Mary

Dear Devilish Divine:
Think younger and more in-your-face good-looking than Stephen. "

- no clear answer on Zac.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Ryan Kwanten by chance?
–Misyol

Dear Bloodthirsty:
Such a delicious thought, and close you are, but Nevis isn't that ripped. "

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has anyone considered Ryan Reynolds as Nevis Divine? He looks all painted up for his next project.
—Sally

Dear Not So Divine:
I can barely keep track of every guess bitch-backed to me, but rest assured Ry's free from Nevis' vices. Mr. Divine ain't hitched, even though you'd barely know R2 was by the way he keeps it hush-hush."

Littlelilac said...

I was intrigued by this blind vice and I see Orlando Bloom was eliminated. I had read at the E! forum that Ted something about ND having a Continental accent and when asked if BV was from England or Australia his reply was whatever gave you that idea which isn't a complete denial. I wracked my brains trying to think who is a hunk around the age of those indicated by the various clues and was from Europe. The only actor that came to mind was Olivier Martinez, he who cheated on Kylie Minogue whilst undergoing breast cancer treatment but from his imdb page he doesn't seem to be busy enough or hot enough right now in Hollywood. However when I googled his name under the news section I got a few articles mentioning that Orlando Bloom and Olivier Martinez are best pals and been out bike riding together recently. Given someone's wonderful
recap on how Orlando Bloom fit the clues???

Tite Ju said...

These are the guys that I think fit more the clues and I would like to discuss it with you guys !
- Jamie Bell
- Gaspard Ulliel
- Dominic Cooper

Tite Ju said...

I forgot an other important one that i thought was already ruled out but.. not yet:
Hugh Dancy!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Are you sure Nevis Divine never worked with Reese Witherspoon? R.Pattz was in a deleted scene with Reese in the movie Vanity Fair.
—Soft Ball Fan

Dear Sneaky Sneaky:
Do you really think I'm that dumb? Just for that, I'm not even going to answer you with a hint. Smooth. "

-- So Ted is sort of eliminating Rob here... saying that is not dumb and wouldn't have missed that. But not really clarifying anything at the same time.

Ted also mentioned that readers are way off on Nevis Devine. So I am keeping Rob as a top guess, but he is definitely not confirmed for this. Stay tuned...

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
My head is spinning with all the Nevis Divine chatter. I started back at the beginning and now have a Divine notebook full of facts! This is my best guess: Sebastian Stan. Did all my hard work pay off?
—curiousgman

Dear Hard Work, No Payoff:
Don't quit your day job. Think much higher profile, babe."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Olivier Martinez?
—ladylch

Dear Divine Guess:
But Nevis is less dripping with sweat than Olivier."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Longtime reader, first-time caller (I think...). Love the column! Certainly the time spent on reading the tabloids must be good for something...Nevis Divine? Michael Cera?
—Natalia

Dear Sweet, Sweet Natalia:
Nevis is far more attractive than that one-trick pony Michael Cera. And haven't I answered this one already? Think far more well-rounded, chiseled."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
How is Nevis Divine's love life going?
—Jennifer

Dear Dating Divine:
Nevis's love life is confusing, as is the case with any good-looking guy who can sleep with probably anyone (and any gender) he wants!"

blurry vice said...

"
Dear Ted:
Is Alexander Skarsgård Nevis Divine?
—Pfuente

Dear Divampire:
Nope. Too Swedish. And not nearly mysterious enough.


Dear Ted:
Does Nevis Divine have a movie coming out in August?
—Melanie

Dear Summer Hope:
Perhaps. He's a very busy boy.


Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Ed Westwick? I think I read something about Nevis Divine being a bit hairy, and, well, I think we all saw the Rolling Stone pictures.
—JNT

Dear Right Track:
Wrong mate.


Dear Ted:
In your Tornado Watch, you say Australian men are "sexy, sweaty, hot and delicious." Then you left a clue in your Bitch-Back! about Nevis Divine being "less sweaty" than the Olivier Martinez! That a clue? I'm going to guess Nevis Divine is Eric Bana! Close?
—K From Kali

Dear Aussie Mystery:
Oh, puss, you're reading far too much into that. This is a simple blolumn, not a perfectly crafted web of carefully placed clues. Think less muscled, but just as deliciously dark—in some ways.


Dear Ted:
I have to ask, do you always speak in double negatives? Being someone who works with language professionally, I notice these things in a slightly different way perhaps than your average fan—it can make one's life rather complicated unless, of course, those close to you understand the doublespeak. It leaves you deliciously having said something that could be read any which way—a total noncommittal. Like all your clues for dear old Nevis Divine. Will you just tell me whether you pay as much attention to the words you choose (and even the punctuation) as your fans (and haters) do? On another note, love the new pup. How is it working out? We had a rescue dog for a while, but it started trying to bite everyone who came near us—lovely to us, but with lots of kids around we couldn't keep it. Our trainer fell in love with her and kept her.
—Anon

Dear Language Love:
It's an art, my dear. Confusion is the name of the game when you're playing with Blind Vices! Glad you got your guy a new home, too, thanks."

Angela said...

What about Ryan Gosling? I don't think this Alex guy is nearly famous enough to have a real pap. following...

Ellie said...

Dear Ted:
I have gone over your clues for Nevis and everyone's guesses. Talk about being all over the dart board! Young, old, light, dark, muscles, skinny. Here's my guess. Another shot in the dark, but Alex O'Loughlin? Australian. He was a vampire in Moonlight and is now in Whiteout (white-hot infamy?). He was in August Rush with Jonathan Rhys Meyers and plays guitar. He broke up with his longtime girlfriend in January. He's not especially "cut" and not immediately humpy, but I find him dead sexy. Close?
—Ebby

Dear Sure:
But not close enough.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I'm not sure if you have answered this, but is James Franco Nevis Divine?
—Jennifer

Dear Franco-furter:
Yes and no. Guess which answer is to which question."

(JF has already been eliminated)

Erin said...

I don't really see how Pattinson is anything but excluded.

Jitta said...

I don't see how Orlando Bloom IS excluded. All Ted said was that not everyone ELSE had been excluded. He never said that Orlando WASN'T Nevis.

-The initial AIAs point to a last naming beginning with B. (Buckley, Badgely, Bleu)

-The Matt Dallas guess was close? How can Matt Dallas be close to anyone resembling Nevis --- except that, if OB is Nevis, it fits that both Matt Dallas and Orlando Bloom both have American cities in their names: Orlando, Dallas.

-He reportedly dated Kirsten Dunst while they were filming Elizabethtown.

-He has 4 projects in various stages of production right now on IMDB, and Ted stated that Nevis is a busy boy.

Meh?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I believe your friend Nevis Divine has to be Keanu Reeves. And Toothy Tile is Jamie Foxx.
—Pearl Mae

Dear Duuuuude:
Close, but no B.V. cigar, dollface. Nevis has a wee bit more personality than Keanu (or at least post-Bill & Ted Keanu). And Toothy is not the Foxx, although Jamie has been a B.V. of his very own of just-as-delicious variety."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Gerard Butler a good guess for Nevis?
—Moflo

Dear Close:
Excellent."

Erin said...

I'm going to throw Rodrigo Santoro out there. His 300 co-star Gerard Butler was an "excellent" guess and Diego Luna was close. He's commonly mistaken for Olivier Martinez, and RS would probably be considered the less "sweaty" of the two. He's younger than Simon Baker, Hugh Jackman, Hugh Grant and Viggo Mortensen and The Rock. He's "close" to JRM in that they've both portrayed real life heads of state multiple times.

He's been recognized in the US since the Charlie's Angels sequel and Love Actually, but not really by name until 300 (which included tons of body paint and exaggerated muscles). He played the infamous Paolo on Lost for a minute. He could be called "sorta hairy, and definitely has a decent coif.

His two high profile couplings could be that model he broke up with and maybe even Nikki, perhaps. He's never been married and has never acted with Meryl or Reese.

He's got a movie coming out in August, Post Grad, co-starring the "sexy-enough" Alexis Bledel (Miss Costar?)

blurry vice said...

"Dear Awful Truth:
Is Nevis Divine Colin Farrell?
—Castro

Dear Colinoscopy:
Nope. Think less vulgar and less sex-tapey."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Awful Truth:
I think I get what is the big deal with the love triangle Sophia Bush/Austin Nichols/Robert Buckley. It is not Sophia/Austin vs Sophia/Robert, but Sophin vs. Robsten. Is Austin Nichols Nevis Divine?
—Bobby

Dear Divine Intervention:
Austin's not Nevis—he wishes he were as popular in the mainstream as ND! Must be what he's hoping for by clinging onto his costars for some press."

"Dear Awful Truth:
I got it. Nevis Divine is Rodrigo Santoro. It's cool, I won't tell.
—StellsBells

Dear Lost in Nevis:
Well, it's a good thing you won't tell, because you're wrong."

olivia__d said...

It has to be Robert Pattinson! I still can't think of anyone else who matches all the little cryptic clues ted has given.

- confirmed as foreign

- when asked if ND was Ed Westwick, Ted said this guess was close. Ed Westwick is also English, and they almost have the same look. Both rising to stardom.

- "There have been lots of pics that prove he and his "best friend" Tom Sturridge share clothes, too."

Dear Wink-Wink:
And your point is?"

= not a denial

- said the guess of Alexander Skarsgård was close. A.S also plays a vampire in True Blood.

- confirmed to be musically talented


I did see the thing about working with Reese Witherspoon so this kind of rains on my whole theory. but stilllllllllll

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
It's been a long time since we've heard anything about Nevis Divine. Does Nevis' current lady know about his bisexuality? Is she bisexual, as well? What's the word for a bisexual man dating a bisexual woman? Brangelina?
—Awful Truth Researcher

Dear Clever One:
Good one! Or quadrosexualism, if you prefer. And the other answer is definitely a yes."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I have such a love-hate thing going on with your Blind Vices. I'm obsessed with finding out who they are, and at the same time, I'm disgusted with myself for even wanting to know. I know you can't reveal most Vices, but will you help me get a little closer to overcoming my obsession by telling me if Toothy Tile is featured in your Blind Vice Superstars gallery? And is Rob Pattinson's B.V. Twilight related?
—Way Too Obsessed

Dear Pushing It:
On the first part, I'll give you this: probably. No comment on the second."

P.M. said...

Did he ever eliminate Jude Law for this one?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I think I have figured out who Nevis Devine is: Chris Evans!
—Apollo James

Dear Wrong:
Don't quit your day job!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Thank you for being the best human you can be for speaking up that there's just no excuse for violence. Having said that, I just can't let a day pass by without checking A.T. I heart Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. Question for you, love, is Jake Gyllenhaal the infamous Nevis Devine?
—Catz

Dear No on Nevis:
Jake's got his own B.V.-worthy secrets to worry about."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Haven't heard about Nevis in a while. What's the sitch? Anything new to dish about? With that in mind, I offer up a guess: Gael García Bernal. Close?
—Orng

Dear Diddling Nevis:
That's not a coincidence, he's been keeping a low profile."

Novia said...

Have you ever had a Blind Vice on Robert Pattinson?
—Love from Norway

Dear Up Front:
Kind of.

------------
I know it's a mistake to read too much into Ted's casual remarks, since he's deliberately misleading, but -- if Robert Pattinson were Nevis Divine, how could that possibly be stretched to "kind of"? That would have to be "yes".

Surely this means RP has to be part of one of those tangled Twilight BVs, and not Nevis.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Need your opinion about some of Robert Pattinson's fans. I was reading some posts in his IDMB board, and they were actually shipping him with one of his best friends Tom Sturridge. They hate Robsten but going gaga over the prospect of RobStu? Do you know if there was something more than friendship going on between the two hotties back when they were just unknown in London?
—J.J.

Dear Gay Rob:
Can't two guys be really good friends anymore?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Do Toothy Tile and Nevis Divine know each other? Not just "business" know, but personally? As in "hang out"?
–Jennifer

Dear Hot Idea:
But no, they don't know know each other."

blurry vice said...

In response to Novia - yes we are aware of that letter. Ted has contradicted himself. In the past he has said that Rob had a starring role in one BV and a supporting role in another. Now ted's answer is "kind of". Very disappointing for Ted to change his answer on the subject. See the comments under "people who ted says are a bv" from august.

blurry vice said...

Ted hinting that Nevis is a "foreigner".

"Dear Ted:
Everyone is hot for Nevis, but who does N.D. really want? What is his deal if he is not "gay, gay" à la Toothy, and he only got up to some mild experimenting back in the day, then why blow it (pardon the pun) out of proportion? Or is he really a stealth player like Crotch Uh-lastic. And if so, will the lady in his life ever be enough to satisfy him? Isn't that just called denial?
—River in Egypt

Dear Valid Q:
I chalk it up to more of a foreigner thing—they're way more open about sexuality than we are here in the states. I think N.D. is still searching for what's really out there...he isn't convinced either way just yet. But he'll find it on his terms."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
There has been a bit of discussion going on re: Nevis Divine and the definition of what a Continental is. Some seem to think that it's a generic term for a European, as opposed to a European who is from mainland Europe (the Continent). Continental USA excludes the islands and Continental Europe does too, does it not?
—Africanuk

Dear Phrase-tastic:
Lets keep it simple—Nevis is from across the pond, but not too far across the pond."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Sandy Boob Peter Gallagher? And is Keanu Reeves Nevis Divine? Love you!
—Mariana

Dear Double Whammy:
Wrong and more wrong! Younger. Love ya right back."

blurry vice said...

cancels out my taylor lautner guess

"Dear Ted:
Does Taylor Lautner have his own Blind Vice?
—Jaime

Dear Taylor Badass:
Nope, still young and innocent. I don't think H'wood pressure has gotten to him yet, but it's only a matter of time."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Would you say that Nevis is bi for pay, but gay all the way?
—Kiss

Dear Rhyming Guesses:
Nevis is most definitely not bi for pay or gay all the way. Lots of guys on the other side of the pond experiment around. It's not as big of a deal over there."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Release me from bondage, and my own personal hell, by telling me that Ryan Gosling, he of recent commando fame, is not Nevis Divine. I've never seen anyone guess him: He's not American, has only been in two serious relationships, is a total hottie and seems definitely like enough of a free spirit to swing both ways! You ignored my last email asking about him, so I'm definitely freaked out that I might be right. End the torture! Is Ryan N.D.?
—Rum

Dear You're Released:
No, Ryan doesn't play for Nevis' team. What a waste, really. Isn't that what all you straight gals say about gay guys?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I've never guessed a B.V. before, but I'm gonna take a stab: Is Jude Law Nevis Divine? Also, totally agree with you on Zac Efron. Saw him in 17 Again (I know, I know...it was a discount theater and the only thing playing), and was kind of impressed by him. He's not just a pretty boy, he's got charisma! I'd imagine he can have a long career with proper management (whatever that is). Also think his new coiffure helps him look more mature.
—Susan

Dear Bye, Younger Years:
Don't be ashamed, Taryn actually owns 17 Again. It's good! As for Jude Law, that's a terrific guess for N.D. But Nevis is more Divine than Jude currently is right now."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has anyone guessed the identity of Nevis Divine yet? My guess is Sam Worthington. And how's Lloyd Boy-Toyed doing lately? Is his propositioned journalist still on his radar? Merry Christmas!
—Curious

Dear Guessing Game:
Of course, out of all of you readers you think no one has correctly guessed Nevis' identity? Duh some of you have! I just won't necessarily print it—or respond. As for Lloyd, no updates on said journo. Think Boy-Toyed is preoccupied right now with himself."

Anonymous said...

I think it is Orlando Bloom, everything seems to fit perfectly, and I didn't see anywhere where he was eliminated, Ted never said No, it's not him, he said something like you haven't eliminated everyone yet or something like that, I can't remember exactly but it didn't seem like to me that Ted was denying that OB was Nevis.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Devine Daniel Radcliffe?
—Kerrie

Dear New One:
Great guess! But wrong guy. Thanks for bringing Nevis back though, actually forgot about him (he's been burying himself in boys and booze for a bit)."

Gemini850 said...

To people who think it is Orlando Bloom it isn't Ted notted him along time ago...."Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Orlando Bloom? It definitely looks like that chick he is with is a beard! Process of elimination.
—ponder.this

Dear Not Bloom:
You haven't eliminated every hunk just yet, deary!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Would Chris Evans be a good guess for Nevis Divine? His last name can be rearranged to Nevas which is sort of close to Nevis. Also, does the "Divine" part have anything to do with Divine, the star of Hairspray? Hang in there!
—Limi

Dear Word Play:
A for effort, but superstud Evans isn't our bisexual babe. Think less beefy. Like, lots."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I was watching the Jimmy Kimmel Live special after the Oscars, which he had Robert Downey Jr. on, and I noticed something about RDJ. I suspect he is a B.V. superstar, perhaps he may even be Nevis Divine, or Toothy Tile. Am I close?
—Sherri

Dear Sherlock Holmes:
RDJ is a Vicer, but you're off on his moniker. Was a while ago, though."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Could Nevis possibly be Adrian Grenier? He's totally not beefy.
—Sam

Dear Vegetarian:
You're on the right path in terms of body size, but think more relevant. Nevis definitely has a more recognizable name than Grenier."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Jeremy Renner? Just a wild guess. Love you!
—MM

Dear Love U Back:
Looks like you've been paying attention to the goss lately. But no, J.R. is not our Nevis. Nevis has never been nominated for as big of an award as Jeremy, but he sure would love to be."

bitteliten said...

"Now, the hint. This hint is actually from Ted C's blind item from March 5. Last week I got an e-mail from one of my friends who is a reporter at a tabloid that said only this:

Ted C. Blind Item
He neglected to mention the V.D."

(CDAN March 16th)

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Anton Yelchin? He's been around for a while, but been really busy lately in New York, I Love You. Born in Russia. Young. On a "Most Beautiful People" list. Am I close? I have rescued 3 dogs and a cat.
—Jessica

Dear Space Case:
The Star Trek stud may be getting more recognition lately, but he's far from Nevis' level of notoriety. Like...eons. Think bigger, more dazzling really."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I read you every day and I love that you support so many shelters! I got my dog at the Humane Society, they really are the best dogs! Anyway, my question: Is Nevis Charlie Sheen? Your last post about him said something about "rehab" and then you said he was on TV a lot.
—Jess

Dear Boozy Babe:
Nevis is a far friendlier drunk than Charlie Sheen. Plus, when N.D. hits the bottle, he's still fairly attractive—albeit a bit sloppy."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I think I've figured out who Nevis Divine is! Is it the yummy Wentworth Miller? He is not an obvious choice because he was born across the pond but grew up in the United States.
—Karen

Dear Brit Born:
Nope—but nice try. Nevis has far more name recognition that the Prison Break star—more hair, too."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I recently heard about Nikki Reed backing out of K-11, a project starring Kristen which was written (and being directed) by Kristen Stewart's mom. All of a sudden Nikki reports to no longer be associated with the project. See here. Any news on what happened there? Also, I don't have a pet that I rescued, due to a supersmall living space and lots of work travel time, but a coworker of mine rescued a 3-year-old yellow lab with tons of behavior issues who's doing really great. Could you tell me if R.Pattz's BV is specifically vamp-related or more open-ended?
—Rae

Dear Late to the Party:
Geez, someone might want to let Hollywood Life (aka the new Star) know that we reported that Nikki stuff back in February. Check it out if you want to hear Kristen's thoughts. She's still trying to make the film happen, but it's clear Nikki's over it. Not getting the feeling all is well yet with these two babes (at all). As for Rob, his Vice isn't specifically vamp-related."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
So, is Nevis Divine Jude Law? Am I in the right ballpark, at least?
—BB

Dear Divine Intervention:
Not quite, but Jude Law and Nev definitely share at least one significant quality."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I know Rob is not Nevis from all of your clues, and everyone would know it too if they would just pay attention. I think it is Cam Gigandet, what do you think?
—H

Dear Wrong-O:
Sorry, babe, but Nevy isn't quite as ripped as sexy daddy Cam. Good guess though—actually, really good guess."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has Nevis Divine changed teams since his younger days and now started dating one woman?
—Leo

Dear Multiplayer:
I don't think Nevis really believes in teams. Isn't that the point of his no-shame same-sex Blind Vice?"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Adam Lambert Nevis Devine?
—Lotta

Dear C'mon:
Clearly not, Adam hasn't kept his guy-loving ways a secret since he ditched Idol. Think much less out there, gay-wise."

Do these people read these blinds? Seriously?

bitteliten said...

Dominic Cooper?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Russell Brand? My apologies if you notted him. He just seems like a perfect fit to me.
—Rachel

Dear Not So Perfect:
Sorry, Rach, but Brand isn't the B.V. star. Nevis would never allow his antics to be as public as Russell's have been. He's got a big image (and even bigger fan base) to uphold, after all."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I think I've cracked the case. And now I feel like an idiot because it was so obvious. Nevis Divine is Jonathan Rhys Meyers. If you don't post this, I'll know I'm right. Love you Ted. Take care.
—Bubble

Dear Detective Divine:
Hate to break it to you, Sherlock, but you haven't quite solved this crafty case. Now would be the absolute worst timing for Nev to need a rehab stint—unlike JRM."

blurry vice said...

That was a repeat elim for JRM.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
You've posted several Blind Vices that are specifically named as being Twilight saga stars. But I'm wondering, have any of the Twilight actors starred in Blind Vice posts where you didn't mention them as being part of the Twi films?
—Casey

Dear Blind Sided:
Of course, babe. That cast is très naughty."

blurry vice said...

""Dear Ted:
My beloved rescue kitty, Burt, is sick, and we are awaiting test results. I'm trying to take my mind of off the situation (like I could ever do that) by surfing the Internet. I saw some recent photos of John Goodman. Any Vice material here?
—Sad Susan

Dear Susie's Q:
I'm so sorry to hear about poor Burt—feel better, love. I'll give you a few freebies about the newly slim John: He's not Nevis Divine, Crescent Cumquat, Tobey Yum-Yum or Toothy Tile. Does that help? My thoughts and prayers are with your puss!"

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Henry Cavill Nevis Divine?
—Stephanie

Dear Tudorific:
Nope. Think much more well-known, but equally mysterious."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I'm a rabid Robsten fan and pretty much lose my pants every time I see Robert Pattinson. However, his slightly less-than-impressive abs in New Moon made me want to throw his ass in a gym! Will Summit make him buckle down before all of the pillow-biting action in Breaking Dawn?
—Sarah

Dear Bulking Up:
Don't count on Rob becoming a gym rat like Tay-Tay. While Taylor's main claim to fame in these flicks is his bod, Rob's got his underused acting chops to fall back on—oh, and his hair, duh."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
We all know Rob Pattinson has been a Blind Vice. Is he still involved in his Blind Vice? And is it the same one? Sorry I can't offer you any pets for favors. I've got huge allergies in my house. We do have three fish...
—Punk

Dear Status Update:
Yes, doll, the same B.V. he's always had. And say hello to your fishy friends."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Has Nevis Divine ever filmed a movie with Reese Witherspoon?
—BB

Dear Moviegoer:
I haven't seen one."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is my beloved Jonathan Rhys Meyers the most famous Nevis Divine?
—Cat

Dear Sex Tudor:
Nope, that he is not."

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
When looking at pictures of Robert Pattinson, what may I ask, is your favorite part to look at?
—Kay

Dear Greaser:
The hair, darling. That guy's got some great, great f--king hair. And the dimples. He's an infectiously happy boy."

x said...

"Dear Ted:
Does Nevis Divine have famous siblings and have a movie coming out soon?
—BMB

Dear Watering for Divine:
Define soon."

i think this points to RPatz as he is currently filming water for elephants.

x said...

"Dear Ted:
Does Nevis Divine have famous siblings and have a movie coming out soon?
—BMB

Dear Watering for Divine:
Define soon."

i think this points to RPatz as he is currently filming water for elephants.

The Spie said...

Now that Blurry was able to track down the date of the "RPattz isn't a BV" statement, we can do process of elimination on it. Supposedly, someone has done this before, but not here (I believe it was at the E! site). So let's lay it out.

Pattinson wasn't a BV, according to Ted, on 23 December 2008. On 2 April 2009, Ted said that he was. This means that he has to be a new BV identity published between those dates. Let's go through, in chronological order, all the new BV identities published during that time, eliminating repeats and all obvious female blinds:

Smokey Shooter: In a relationship with Mimi Kitten, and there's a significant and well-noted age difference between the two. Not RPattz.

Crescent Kumquat: AIAed. Not RPattz.

Wally Wallup: Wrong ethnicity and nationality. Not RPattz.

Crawley McNugget: TV star. Not RPattz.

Nevis Divine: Obviously, the one we're discussing. RPattz has never been AIAed for this.

Schlong Sleaze-Wad: Married, plus RPattz is explicitly mentioned in the BV itself. Not RPattz.

Judas Jack-Off: AIAed. Not RPattz.

Brain-Fry Noodlestein: Implied to have had a long career in the business. RPattz not eliminated, but does not fit the description at all, enough so that we can say Not RPattz.

No-Beave Steve: AIAed. Not RPattz.

Schlong Fenn: Doesn't fit the description in the least. Not RPattz.

Bart Farts-a-Lot: AIAed. Not RPattz.

That's it. The only one that RPattz fits or hasn't been AIAed for is Nevis. The moment that Ted AIAed Bart Farts-a-Lot, there was no doubt.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Have you seen Vanity Fair starring Reese Witherspoon?
—Jen

Dear Sneaky Bitch:
Nope."

-- This is fantastic! Totally clarifies the "not been in a movie with Reese" thing "not that I've seen". Love it!!! Totally a hint for Rob as Nevis!

blurry vice said...

Spie - it was Heather, underneath the most recent Nevis BV I think.

The Spie said...

Blurry: Since I wasn't following the most recent thread at the time I wrote this, I didn't know that Heather and I had done the same work at virtually the same time. But that wasn't what I was alluding to. Supposedly, though, months ago at another site, someone did the same thing that Heather and I did and came up with the same conclusion. That person, though, did it prior to RPattz being AIAed for Bart Farts-a-Lot.

blurry vice said...

repeat elim

"Dear Ted:
Is Ed Westwick Nevis Divine and is Jessica Szohr Miss Costar? Am I close?
—Stine

Dear Szhor Thing:
Nope, but what fantastic and close guesses those were! Kudos!"

reddevil said...

Dear Ted:
When Nevis Divine, his GF and his BF are all together in the same city...who do you think usually ends up with Nevis behind closed doors? I can only assume he's generally with his girl when the paps are around. But who lights his fire more when the shutterbugs aren't privy?
—Hannah

Dear Bi the Bi:
Well, when that happens it's kind of split. Nev has done the nasty with both, of course, and picks depending on his mood. We totally root for Barrington though; they're so adorable together! Not sure how much bedroom time he's been banking with either though, of late.

reddevil said...

'Not sure how much bedroom time he's been banking with either though, of late.'....well that just eliminates RPattz completely now, if some of the previous clues weren't enough for some people...in the midst of Montreal loving and Bel Air love nest/another secret place, which Ted has reported on as well, plus all the 'obsessed' love for Robsten from Ted, this goes against RP as ND theory. So many obvious clues against, time to start thinking outside the box

Mspriss said...

The last BB pretty much cancels out Robert. He has spent a lot of time recently with Kristen and also been around Tom so Ted's comment of 'Not sure how much bedroom time he's been banking with either though, of late.' pretty much confirms that it's not Rob.

This is one he will probably never reveal.

Ivana said...

This Nevis Devine thing is bugging me so much!
If Rob is Nevis how come Ted says he is not immediately hump worthy, or that he's less good looking than James McAvoy?
And how can Justin Bartha, Bradley Cooper, Cam Gigandet and Gerard Butler all be good guesses?
This is confusing, damn it!

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Is Dominic Monaghan Nevis Divine?
—Cecilia


Dear Nev-er Ever:
Nope. Dom is a different—much more (socially) innocent—Vice."

robert said...

I want to bring up one hint from Ted C. Either Ted totally messed up giving this hint to Nevis or everybody is wrong. Ted said that Nevis has never played a gay character before, yet Robert played a gay character in Little Ashes. So did Ted mess up or is everybody guessing wrong?

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
Tell me a little more about Nevis Devine and his relaysh with his girl. Are they likely to go the long haul? Any concerning signals that they may not make it? And if so does this mean maybe his relationship with his fella might be more durable in the long haul since you've suggested its not quite as serious? You know, as a looser commitment, it might therefore withstand time apart, temptations, other more standard relationship testers?
—Steph

Dear In Order:
Doubtful; debauchery and alcoholism, maybe?; he's even less of a long shot, trust, so the last one doesn't really apply, sorry!

Dear Ted:
How long has Nevis Divine been famous: five years, 10 years, longer? Has he done any TV jobs?
—C

Dear Fame Game:
Dude's been in the Biz for awhile now, but the height of his fame has been in the last five years. And no to jobs on the boob tube; Nevis is all about the big screen.

Dear Ted:
New Year's resolution: I'm giving up trying to figure out who Nevis Divine is. If the obvious answer isn't right, as you've said in the past, then I've got nothin'. So, who's going to be the sexy new Blind Vice in 2012?
—EA

Dear Not So Divine:
Why give up now, doll? I think 2012 may be Nevis' Viciest year yet. Here's a hint: It will be a big year for his career as well.

Dear Ted:
Is Nevis Divine Bradley Cooper? He seems so Vicey to me. If not, am I warm or cold?
—Sutherland

Dear Not So Nevis:
Sorry, S, but Bradley Cooper's no Nevis Divine. He is just as hot though and very Vicey—you have that much correct.

Dear Ted:
Since Nevis Divine has been a popular topic and I'm sort of new to the BVs, I had a few questions: Why is 2012 going to be a big (you put it in italics) year for him? Project- or relationship-wise? Thank you so much!
—Allie

Dear New Year's Resolutions:
Project-wise, doll—I'm sure his relaysh front will be just as kookoo crazy as always in the new year! In fact, count on it.

Dear Ted:
Before we get to the real question, just want to say that I'm so glad to hear that your colleague Giuliana Rancic is doing so well...bless her. My question is about Robsten: In the past you've made them sound like a couple who are totally monogamous, abstaining from all others...could this really be true?
—Leigh

Dear Robsten Plus One?
I've said it forever and I'll say it again: These two don't cheat on each other. But they're hardly the traditional type and make no secret of their Vicey behavior. That's why they're the perfect match."

Just Call Me Alex! said...
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Just Call Me Alex! said...
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