Sunday, May 6, 2012

Blind Vice! Hot Celeb Thinks Different to Get Lucky

New from Ted on Friday May 4 -

Blind Vice!  Hot Celeb Thinks Different to Get Lucky!

Traylor McMuff is the kind of celeb dude who enjoys many of the trappings of Hollywood life. But the guy will probably never go home with an Oscar, that's just a cold hard fact.
Instead, Traylor gets to take back to his bicoastal abodes many other things, mainly lots of money, tons of friends who love his outgoing personality, and, um, just about every woman who he comes in contact with, both married and not.
What's his secret?
Traylor hangs out almost exclusively with gay men!
See, Traylor knows that despite his killer abs and face, both L.A. and New York are chock-full of gorgeous young men who are dying to show almost any woman a good time. And even though Traylor's bod is drop-dead tight (still) and his face is chiseled as they come, he is not, how shall we say, getting any younger.
He therefore loves nothing more than going out—sometimes several times in one week—with his friends to gay bars. Because Traylor knows full well that often where gay men go, also go their straight best girlfriends.
And these gals are usually so taken aback to find out Traylor isn't secretly gay (as many folks think) they're willing to do just about anything the McMuff asks.
Which just happens to always include taking them back to his pad and—how shall I put this?—having nooky that's not exactly great for everybody.
Just Traylor.
What a naughty boy in more ways than one!
AND IT AIN'T: Matthew McConaughey, Mark Wahlberg, Kanye West

Update 5/11/12 Ted has eliminated: Matthew McConaughey, Mark Wahlberg, Kanye West, Jeremy Renner.

Top suspect: 

24 comments:

blurry vice said...

Sorry for the delay this week, readers! This is a juicy one. We need more clues though, This could be anyone.

MISCH said...

Lets narrow it down somewhat, who ever it is, is 40ish or better..
An actor but most probably more popular than he deserves to be (little talent, no Oscar ever)
Keeps homes in New York & L.A
And not a great lover....
Lets go to work....

MISCH said...

P.S McMuff if this is a hint, Irish, Scottish ...

BlahBlahBlah said...

Screamed Mark Wahlberg to me, then I saw he was an AIA...so the AIA have M and W if thats anything to go on...

FrenchGirl said...

Gerald butler? The Rock? Vin Diesel?
maybe The Rock:he's black (like Kanye) and is working in a Michael Bay movie actually with Walhberg and has a great body (like McConnaughey)

FrenchGirl said...

and what is juicy here? that the guy isn't gay?

pikespeak said...

Jeez, this is a hard one. Could be anybody.

reallytotally said...

At first glance, The Rock/Dwayne Johnson and Vin Diesel would seem to be top guesses: they have secretive love lives, and consequently haven't they both had gay rumors floating about? They're also both unlikely Oscar-contenders, have killer abs, chiselled looks, and are 40+ so "not getting any younger".

On the other hand, I agree with MISCH that the McMuff moniker might indicate his background, especially when the AIAs Mark Wahlberg Matthew McC both have Irish heritage. Rock is African Canadian-Samoan, Diesel is African American-Italian, so no go there as far I can tell. How about Paul Walker then? Irish ancestors, 39 yrs, no Oscars in the radar, chiselled.

Well, since the scoop isn't too scandalous - selfish straight sex, that's a first! - Ted might just reveal this anyway...

Savannah said...

This BV is bizarre to me. Screams PR plant... So Traylor is a good-looking celebrity who regularly resorts to trolling gay bars for straight women? And Ted's logic is that because Traylor is getting older he can't compete with younger men? Even though the guy is a celebrity?

If an actor was regularly scene hanging out in gay bars, wouldn't there be stories about it all over the internet? I call bullshit. Ted was probably paid to try to 'in' someone.

Jack Ford said...

Two gyus that have been snapped at gay bars off the top of my head:

Keifer Sutherland and Daniel Craig. To me, Keifer is fug and Daniel Craig could possibly win an oscar so I dunno.

I agree with Savannah that this inning seems pointless and definitley not juicy. Add this to the "Alexander SkarsgÄrd is happy with Charlize" blind and I'm sooo bored.

Rebecca said...

Hey guys, I've been away for quite some time now...

Ehh, this BV is weird, I can't think of anyone!

PS: can you guys tell me which BV we think it's from the One Tree Hill Cast and Gossip Girl? Thanks.

Mrs.Chris Evans said...

I'm going with Vin Diesel. He goes well with the AIA.

Mark Wahlberg (Vin Diesel's real name is Mark Vincent.)
Matthew Mc (Vin is known for having a good body. He isn't a good actor.)
Kanye West (African ancestry)

MrsZab said...

About a week ago I emailed Ted and asked for some dirt on The Rock. The guy is gorgeous but you never hear much about his personal life! However, this blind is so OPEN

littlemizpoet91 said...

yeah, this blind doesn't really make sense from a logical standpoint. I have a ton of gay male best friends and i have only been invited to go to guy clubs with them once or twice. gay clubs really aren't the best place to pick up girls and thats a big risk for a celebrity to make just to get laid. if this guy is good looking AND famous why would he have to go to such an extreme when guys that are older and in nowhere near good shape have no problem picking up girls? i won't call bullshit yet but ted needs to give more clues.

PrincessTiff said...

This strikes me as Jude Law. What stood out to me was "cold hard fact." Perhaps it's just because I have a Renee Zellweger movie on right now, but I immediately thought of the movie Cold Mountain. He used to be a heart-throb, but he is definitely aging and the "naughty boy" comment reminds me of the shennanigans he had with his children's nanny.

FrenchGirl said...

Jude Law was nod twice

Kamil said...

@Savannah: I agree. Because call me crazy, but I expect there's a celeb just like ole' Traylor up there in every particular but one: Traylor2.0 is as gay as a tree full of parrots, and is about to have some gossip about spending all of his time hanging out with gay guys /in gay bars come down the pike, making this an attempt to have everyone think, "oh, it's the guy from Ted's Blind a few weeks back!" instead of, "Oh, that's odd. I wonder if he's gay too?".

Ted will in with the best of them, and I totally think that's what this is.

blurry vice said...

"Dear Ted:
I love The Awful Truth, but this is the first time I've emailed in. Is Traylor McMuff Jeremy Renner? Much love!
—X

Dear Renner Cop:
Nice try! But not even close, hon. Think, uh, far beefier."

Unknown said...

I mean, he is a soap star but I'm not sure how loaded he is to have bi-coastal properties, but, anyone think of Shemar Moore? He is in his 40s, very attractive and I think he is a "familiar face" to the average person even if they don't know his name.

Matthew McConaughey, Mark Wahlberg, Kanye West...well...Shemar is half Irish and black so maybe the Mc and Kanye reference this.

He was also spotted nude at a nude gay beach and if he is going to gay clubs and has been seen in them a lot then this EXCUSE for being there is necessary - though...at this point unbelievable. Even as a vice.

If its someone else...im not sure at the moment!

jadorephotos said...

The Kanye AIA is throwing me, but when I think of Mark Wahlberg, Matt Mc, and Vin Diesel I automatically think Paul Walker, who is super buff. Anyone have a clue what he's been up to lately? Think back to when movies like Fear, Cruel Intention, Dazed and Confused ect. were making the rounds b/c Mark and Matt became popular around the same time so I'm thinking it is possible that it is someone else that became popular about that time and Paul Walker did. The only thing is that the Kanye thing is throwing me. Then again though, Vin Diesel also sort of fits maybe even better! However, Jude Law, who I adore by the way, is not at all what I would call beefy! He appears tall and lanky. Here's something else I thought I would throw out Mark W was a rapper turned actor and Kanye is a rapper, so could this be someone that raps and acts? I know that would not apply to Matt Mc. but there could be another connection to him. Any ideas? I wish we had more to go on, there are a lot of possibilities let's start throwing out all the super muscular guy celebs in their mid to late thirties up to mid fourties (this could be anyone over thirty really b/c thirty isn't that young in Hwood at the same time though 40-50 year olds still get parts and it's easier for older men than it is for older women, so the STILL comment doesn't help except to know that he's not super young and probably been in Hwood for awhile) and see who we come up with. BTW I'm not aware who all has already been a Blind so if I add a name of someone that it can't possibly be then feel free to correct me!

Guesses So far that could fit (some may be too young or another vice star IDK just names of muscular guys I'm throwing out):
Vin Diesel
Paul Walker
Shemar Moore
Daniel Craig
The Rock
Gerard Butler
Henry Cavill
Orlando Bloom
Nick Lachey
what about MCsteamy? Eric Dane
LL Cool J
Channing Tatum
Hugh Jackman
Kellan Lutz

Hendrix said...

What about Jason Statham?

Actually Vin Diesel or the Rock are very good guesses. The Rock is known to be a total slut behind the scenes (even while married) and to like exceedingly kinky sex.

Which of these is known to be bi-coastal?

Pema said...

Michael C Hall?

He's got reddish hair, green eyes and definitely a ginger beard... 'Mc' could also be a pun on M.C. His initials.

He's not super beefy but he is fit and hot. He's in his 40s so no longer a spring chicken. And gay rumors have followed him about although that's not a vibe I get from him. But I'm often barking up the wrong tree, so to speak.

He's definitely A list TV actor but his movies have not set the world on fire so an Academy Award is not on the cards. Not imminently.

And Traylor could be a pun on 'trailer' where it has been rumored that MCH likes to get frisky in between takes on set. Not sure what evidence there is for that but it's definitely been rumored.

And maybe his gay friend is a good looking co-star on his current TV show, as they have been seen hanging out quite a bit together. And MCH seems to like them young looking... Young girls go to nightclubs?

He is definitely bicoastal. Works, lives and plays in both LA and New York.

Pure speculation and guesswork. And I bet I'm wrong! I'm new at this and finding it surprisingly entertaining...

Pema said...

Oh and he is most definitely 'chiseled', like Mark Wahlberg, who this isn't.

I've not looked at previous BVs yet, so am not up to scratch on any of them... Has Traylor McMuff been mentioned before?

nycgal212 said...

I would say Joe m. From true blood. Definitely chiseled and is good friends with Matt Bomer who is gay

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